To keep sending DS to nursery

[elsiewoo]

DS has been going to nursery for 2 days a week for the past 18 months - he is 3.5

He has cried every single morning at drop off. Recently the tears before nursery have got much worse sand he is completely hysterical by the time I take him in. He can't explain what he doesn't like but he doesn't socialise well with other children and doesn't generally enjoy large groups. Until recently however he has got through the day ok and is generally in good spirits when I collect him.

I'm wondering if the recent ramped up hysterics is because he has just gained a new sister 4 weeks ago (which he is not happy about). Although I'm not at work currently i do need him to be there so I can get to grips with my new DD. But I feel like the worst mother in the world dragging him into nursery screaming every week.

He will start school in September- august birthday - so I hoped nursery would be good preparation and he has learned a lot. It is a lovely nursery and the staff are very good with him.

Should I take him out or try to find another nursery, or hope he settles down?

I just want him to be happy to go and to enjoy nursery but it feels impossible.

I really feel for you because my dd was exactly the same and it is heartbreaking to see them so distressed. It must be really hard coping with a new baby as well and totally get why you'd like a bit of time while ds is at nursery, but if it's not working out you have other options, we had to go down the route of phasing nursery in very gently, one morning for half a term, and one morning with a lovely childminder where she was happy and at ease alongside just 2 other children. Then 2 mornings at nursery for the next half term and still one morning with the cm, which is what we still do now she's 3 (she started in September). Go with your instinct and if you feel it is too much for him then reduce his sessions to half days or take him out altogether - have you considered a childminder, or a smaller nursery?

I personally think some professionals like hv' s or childcare providers and I stress SOME these days are too hot to label children with a problem just because they might not settle as quickly or be as confident in these settings as other kids. We're all different and I think it's perfectly normal at such a young age to find the chaos of nursery overwhelming, I remember it well myself when I was a child. Some children are just shy or sensitive or just don't like crowds, noise etc, nothing wrong with that imo xxx

Spag's post just made me actually lol