to give this child a birthday present

[Justforlaughs]

Context, 13 yo went to a friends "party" 2 weeks ago. I was away at the time and left arrangements to DS and DH. Turns out they didn't buy anything, even a card. I didn't realise this until this weekend, when it was DS's birthday. He recieves a card with a small token gift (joke). If it hadn't been for DSs birthday I would have bought a gift for the other 13 yo when I realised that we hadn't in fact given him anything, now I feel awkward about it. Should I just leave it, should I explain to his mother that I wasn't there or should I buy him something?

If this is a longterm friendship, I'd give the mum a card with something like a book token in it and explain that your DH and DS are frankly useless.

I would.

Do you think that it might look like a hint that I think they should give MY DS a gift?

Yes, give him something. And have a word with DH and DS, in a tactful way, about their not bothering with card or gift.

I think you're overcomplicating things, just do what you think is right to fix the mistake your DS & DH made.

If you know the parent then speak to them and just say you left money but they didn't buy anything (joke about useless etc). But if you don't know the parents just leave it - your 13 yo didn't think it was an issue and there was no issue back so - count yourself out of it. I think 13 is about old enough to decide whether or not to take a present to a party. And if you can get out of a round of needless presents just after Christmas then all the better.

Maybe you could treat the boys to something another night instead - fancy icecream on a film night in or something.

get a card and gift and tearshreds over your husband and son why didnt they remember

def get a present and explain what happened. but seriously - your dh and ds have something to answer to!

Yes, I would buy something and explain. My son always gave his then best friend nice gifts on his birthday. From him we received a book on one occasion (the type you would pick up in a discounted type book shop) and absolutely nothing, not even a card the second time, again just as in your case the mum was away for a few days. I wouldn't be able to do that. The boys family are loaded so no money issues.