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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have unprotected sex even though we don't want to conceive.

69 replies

Seekingsense · 12/01/2014 19:42

Planning to ttc in the near future so had Mirena coil removed in November so I could give my cycles chance to regulate prior to ttc.

Definitely do not want to conceive until at least March (various reasons).

LMP was 1st January and previous cycle was 38 days long. Been monitoring LH levels and no LH surge today.

Had a 'special' evening planned for DH and found out an hour ago that we've run out of condoms Shock Local shop does not sell them and nearest supermarket is 30 minute drive away!

WIBU to go for it anyway? Realistically, I'm unlikely to conceive at this point in my cycle, am I?

Ahhhhh. Frustrated.

OP posts:
thenightsky · 12/01/2014 19:43

Ah just do it. I did. Got pregnant instantly Grin

NatashaBee · 12/01/2014 19:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PissesGlitter · 12/01/2014 19:44

Only have unprotected sex if you are willing to get pregnant

I don't care where I am on my cycle I never have unprotected because there is no way in the world I would be happy to have another child

TwatWeevil · 12/01/2014 19:45

You are about 99.99% guaranteed to get pregnant if you do.

I wasn't ovulating when we conceived DC2...Grin

FalalalalalalaFiggy · 12/01/2014 19:45

If you thinking about it soon anyway why not (says I who got pg last year on exactly the type of evening you suggesting in similar circumstances)

SauvignonBlanche · 12/01/2014 19:46

I thought I didn't need to bother going into the next room to get my diaphragm.
DS thought otherwise, only risk it if conception wouldn't be a disaster, it wasn't for me, just earlier than planned.

BigBirthdayGloom · 12/01/2014 19:47

Thing is, even with no surge today, you could get one tomorrow and the sperm would still be ready and waiting. If the reasons are really strong to wait til march then either postpone the "special evening" for an hour while one of you goes to the supermarket and back. If not-go for it.

BertieBowtiesAreCool · 12/01/2014 19:47

Can't you ask him to get some on the way home from work? Root around in drawers etc :o are there really none in the local shop, they may have them behind the counter.

Misfitless · 12/01/2014 19:48

How important is it not to conceive till March?

You must have set that deadline for very specific reasons.

If you'll be pleased to conceive tonight, go for it...otherwise, it's a no-brainer, surely?

NorthernLurker · 12/01/2014 19:48

Sure go for it. Autumn babies are the oldest in the school year Grin

Misfitless · 12/01/2014 19:49

Sorry to be so boring and practical...I've no room to talk, believe me!

ShreddedHoops · 12/01/2014 19:49

You say yourself that your cycles aren't yet regular due to the coil, so it's definitely a risk. I guess if it were a disaster if you got pg though you wouldn't be asking, so go for it! Just make sure you do a POAS thread in a fortnight Wink

Having said that, DH and I avoided sex for a week each month before we ttc, then when we targeted ovulation time then I got pregnant first time. So I do quite like the rhythm method or whatever you want to call it, as long as it's not essential that you don't fall pg. but if your cycles are irregular then you can't realistically know when you're ovulating until they settle down.

zizzo · 12/01/2014 19:50

You don't have to go all the way, you know!

Oral, MM, etc.?

PicardyThird · 12/01/2014 19:51

We used the rhythm/calendar method successfully for several years, but I had very regular cycles of the textbook 28-day-give-or-take-a-day-or-two type and so was able to predict which period wouldn't be safe and give it a wide berth (or condoms) with a day-ish either side for safety.

I wouldn't have risked it in your situation if I really, really didn't want to get pregnant.

Now to March is only two months. Does it make that much difference?

BertieBowtiesAreCool · 12/01/2014 19:52

You could.just have anal sex :o

Thegreatunslept · 12/01/2014 19:53

My friend thought the same got pregnant the 1st month after coil was removed.

newyearhere · 12/01/2014 19:55

Sperm can live for a few days, so even if you don't ovulate for a few more days, you could still get pregnant. The egg only lives for 12-24 hours after it's released.

WitchWay · 12/01/2014 19:57

It's nearly March - relax!

Rosencrantz · 12/01/2014 19:58

I'd do it. You want a baby right?

If you categorically didn't want a child, you wouldn't be considering this. But you do, so do it.

If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, it doesn't. You don't need to actively try until March, but up until then you can not not try, Iyswim?

ToffeeOwnsTheSausage · 12/01/2014 19:58

YWBU, you would be daft.

You want to wait until March so why are you doing the opposite?

ToffeeOwnsTheSausage · 12/01/2014 19:59

YWNOT BU

Original poster
Seekingsense · 12/01/2014 20:01

The difference of a couple of months makes a massive financial difference with contractual mat pay entitlement etc. so the sensible answer is that I'm obviously being unreasonable, aren't I?

I've had some wine so can't drive to supermarket. DH is apparently in the mood, but not enough to be arsed to do an hour round trip Hmm

Will have to come up with something else to do this evening Wink

BertieBowtiesAreCool last time we tried that, it didn't agree with me.

OP posts:
WitchWay · 12/01/2014 20:03

Give him a blow job

Famzilla · 12/01/2014 20:03

I "wasn't ovulating" when the condom split, 2 days after coming off the pill.

I'm now a mother.

trashcanjunkie · 12/01/2014 20:05

You could do 99% ie everything but the deed. Lots of fun Grin

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