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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can't believe what I am reading...

358 replies

SmileItsANewYear · 03/01/2014 18:16

Some people think that it's ok to give a child alcohol (as long as over the age of 5)

What the actual fuck?

OP posts:
Binkyridesagain · 03/01/2014 19:13

The best thing about going to my Nans on Boxing day was the Snowballs, it was the only time I was allowed one, It was a tradition from when I was about 5yrs old.

Really fancy one now, or a Baileys, sadly I've drunk both bottles over xmas.

HaroldTheGoat · 03/01/2014 19:14

Why would you say you feel sorry for the child? That's just plain ridiculous.

MarmaladeBatkins · 03/01/2014 19:18

I think "I feel sorry for your child" is supposed to be cutting, a way to make you think about what an awful person you are.

Instead, it makes the person saying it look like a pompous arsepart.

ohmymimi · 03/01/2014 19:19

Snowballs and port and lemon were always Xmas treats at neighbours' homes. I've never been drunk in my life. It's about context.

Madambossyboots · 03/01/2014 19:19

I do believe, I'll be corrected if wrong, from 14 years old children can have certain alcoholic drinks with a meal in a restaurant or bar (that permits children) provided they are accompanied by adults. I think its is fine.
I also think that a small amount of alcohol on (special) occasions is perfectly acceptable. It removes the curiosity and IMO takes away the need to be sneaky, because if children ask to taste alcohol, more often than not they do not like it, but they know if they ask they can have it.
Furthermore sensible parents do not need to be told what amount is ok, grant parents some credit fgs.

Original poster
SmileItsANewYear · 03/01/2014 19:19

Well it's clear we have different views on ridiculous.

OP posts:
Pixel · 03/01/2014 19:21

What I don't get is if there is a tiny amount of alcohol in a drink for a child that it tastes like pop, why not just give them pop?

Mine was never disguised as pop, I was allowed to taste the proper drink. Quite liked neat southern comfort as it happens.

themaltesefalcon · 03/01/2014 19:21

My nana used to let me have some sherry trifle at Christmas.

How I survived such abuse, I'll never know.

HaroldTheGoat · 03/01/2014 19:21

We certainly do, what a stupid thing to feel sorry for a child over.

BIWI · 03/01/2014 19:21

My goodness, there is a lot of hysteria and ignorance about alcohol here!

First, if you put wine (or any other alcohol) in food, and heat it up, the alcohol will be cooked out. It is in there purely to add flavour.

Second, a small glass of alcohol on a special occasion (i.e. only occasionally rather than several times every day) will not harm anyone. And, as the poster who talked about doing this on the other thread (TAAT is very bad form) made clear, it was a small glass, diluted with ice, drunk over a long period of time - and also after food.

Calm down, OP!

MarmaladeBatkins · 03/01/2014 19:22

Babycham is called Babycham for a reason.

happytalk13 · 03/01/2014 19:22

Hang on ...nope, sorry, I don't have any of those...

Original poster
SmileItsANewYear · 03/01/2014 19:22

And for the record I am not saying that it makes her a shit mum I am only saying that I think any parent giving a child of 8 a drink which is 17% alcohol has hugely misjudged how to appropriately introduce alcohol to a minor.

An 8 year old doesn't need to understand alcohol IMO. That comes later in life.

OP posts:
LtEveDallas · 03/01/2014 19:23

Yes you are nearly correct Madame. The law is beer, wine or cider with a meal in a restaurant at age 16 as long as they are accompanied by an adult.

At home a child over the age of 5 can be given alcohol, it doesn't specify what kind.

Philoslothy · 03/01/2014 19:24

I would never give my children Baileys, I would buy then the Lidl version

HeadfirstThroughTheTimeVortex · 03/01/2014 19:24

Saying that you feel sorry for someone's child for having a small drink as a one off is ridiculous. Whatever your views on allowing children small amounts of alcohol. It was an unnecessary jibe.

HaroldTheGoat · 03/01/2014 19:25

It's baileys not buckfast.

Even if you wouldn't personally do it I don't get why you would say that. Saying "I feel sorry for your child" is totally inferring you think someone is a shit parent else why would you say it?

You could just say, well I don't agree with that or similar.

MarmaladeBatkins · 03/01/2014 19:25

You've come across as quite pompous and arsey, OP. On this thread and the other one.

You told me to grow up for mucking about and not hurting anyone, then you said you felt sorry for LtEve's DD.

I bet you're a right bag of laughs. :)

jacks365 · 03/01/2014 19:25

I want a baileys too now problem is the onky bottle in the house is my daughter's. Creme caramel one is delicious.

I did allow my children from a youngish age to enjoy a glass of wine with us ( watered down) but since the only drinking that goes on is on a sunday dinner if we have guests the dc got a pretty good example of responsible drinking and emulate that themselves now. Dd1 who is at uni gets fed up with some others attitudes to alcohol and the excess they drink.

So op what age do you deem the absolute minimum for a sip or a very small glass.

happytalk13 · 03/01/2014 19:26

As an aside...my DC1 once had a full glass of wine at 2 - exDH had left it on the floor - the mess the next morning.

Still, it was a better choice than other things exDH would leave on the floor - drain cleaner, methylated spirits, nail guns, knives.....

HeadfirstThroughTheTimeVortex · 03/01/2014 19:26

Saying that you feel sorry for someone's child is implying that they are a shit parent. It's insulting.

HaroldTheGoat · 03/01/2014 19:27

"Can't believe what I'm reading "

"What the actual fuck"

"I feel sorry for your child"

Yep, as pompous as it gets just about.

And if it wasn't enough to have a dig on the thread in question you've started a whole new one.

RhondaJean · 03/01/2014 19:28

What ws this original thread anyways?

Weller · 03/01/2014 19:28

How things change, I used to make home made baileys with my great aunt at the age of 8, always had a taste and have never really thought about it being appropriate. Teenage years seemed to be the influence for my friends drinking and my own nothing to do with having baileys or snowballs at christmas and new year. My parents definitely did not introduce diamond white which was the choice drink of my friends at the time.

morethanpotatoprints · 03/01/2014 19:29

My dc had their first sip of sherry about 4 years old, whenever the glass went down they had a sip, they loved it for the sweetness.
2 are grown up now and don't have a drink problem, in fact they are very conservative with alcohol.
They also had a glass of wine on special occasions as teenagers.
I agree with posters who did likewise and said their dc didn't raid their drinks cabinet, or go to parties that ended with them chucking up.