To think if dh can go to footy match on NYD..

[Orangeanddemons]

I can have justb3 hours to myself to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallowes?

Dh was out from 12-6 yesterday. Then his friend came round until about 7.00. I looked after dd when all this was going on.

So... I settle down to watch Hp, thinking Dh would deal with dd and take her to bed. But no, I had to deal with dd
Singing
Talking
Talking to her Furby and it talking back
Moaning
Dancing in front of tv
Standing in front of tv
Giving me Polly Pockets to dress
Jumping around and being as noisy and disruptive as possible throughout the whole thing

The point of that film, is if you take your eyes off screen for a minute you miss something.
Dh meanwhile sits in the other room and performs satellite parenting. Ie not there, but muttering ineffectual "be quiets' to dd, which have no affect at all. He then decided to take her to be at 9.45 pm!

I never ever watch tv, and hardly ever get time to myself. He on the other hand had had about 7 hours doing what he wanted with no interruptions!

Did you tell him to come get her so you could watch it in peace?

Yes, several times

Yanbu my dh also went to watch a match yesterday but he's been looking after the dc all week while I've been working, doing most of the cooking and cleaning and last night while I bathed the dc he hoovered and cleaned up the days mess so that we could both sit down and relax when they were in bed.

Can you go out for a few hours by yourself today? Sometimes the only way to get "you" time is by actually leaving the house.

Well did you not tell him to come and get her so you could watch the film?

Next time he wants to go to football, he's going to have to take dd with him.

Then you get a few hours rest.

Then why didn't he? Satellite parenting - not heard that one, v clever, that's exactly what my DH does. Dd is only 7 months though, but still, she's fun to play with, and she rolls so fast you really have to be down on the floor interacting or she'll suddenly appear underneath the Christmas tree eyeing up the lights' cable...

Yanbu! I'd be pissed off as well.

What did he do when you asked him to come and get her?

Said "in a minute" every time. But I could only ask him in the advert breaks, if I tried to call him in the film, I missed what was happening.

Go out to the cinema today on your own and watch a film in peace and quiet with a large gin popcorn. Your DH can do some parenting. If he is working today then book the ticket for the weekend.

Couldn't you record it and insist on uninterrupted time to watch it later? Obviously he's used to ignoring reasonable requests and that needs addressing. No reason why he shouldn't go to match but ignoring the request was rude. If you don't address that though you enable the behaviour.

The problem lies with you I'm afraid OP. You let your dh ignore you

I know, but I was gripped, and couldn't bear to leave it for a minute! But I did tell him earlier it was the only thing I wanted to do all holiday, so he knew. He just chose to ignore!

I hate it when he does that be quiet thing. As if it makes any difference. It's just because he thinks he should be doing something, and that's the only thing he can do with no effort

So what was the outcome?

make him buy it on DVD for you then put dd to bed early and watch it all again, with headphones on the TV so you can't hear anything else.

YANBU
When the DDs were small I'd vanish to the sales for a day and leave them with DH.

DH wouldn't have been anywhere like football, but he would have cooked and chatter to and quite possibly wandered off on Boxing Day with my DDad.

He finds small DCs plus visitors stressful and he finds over excited DCs plus visitors very stressful.

That's fine, I'll watch DDs and talk to DMum who has arthritis and can't go for a walk.

But I get my day at the Sales as soon as they have gone!

I should add that DH and my DDad happily talk science and engineering for hours so vanishing into the study or dinning room to natter is pretty much equivalent to football or pub (both if which DH would hate).