To be sad I didn't get any Christmas presents ?

[Timetogetup0630]

DD made me something cute, but no one else got me anything.

I' m not a materialistic person, but a nice box of expensive chocks would have gone down well.

Next year I am buying a gift for myself, I hosted all my siblings and their Dp and DC and DMum and MIL. Mum bought me perfume realised I was allergic to it and returned it and said I will buy you another in the sales am still waiting Dsis bought and lost my gift and Db could not afford anything not even a hand drawn card by dc and DP is over sea's with military and did not manage even a card or a skype ex and DSC got one though And all arts and crafts from school were for DP and ended up costing me a fortune in postage
OP I am putting £2.00 a week into a jar just for me next xmas, maybe do that it is the least you deserve

LaGuardia I believe that is a good example of a goad which is more of a hijack than my sharing of experiences to make the OP feel less alone in having a bit of a bummer at Christmas.

Yes, I would remind dh not to just leave gifts lying in the street but to be honest I think he's gutted enough so for now I'll just show him some extra love.

Thanks for your input though. Love and peace

yanbu. buy yourself one next year x

Treat yourself to something nice, that is what I do. Best way to get exactly what you want. . OP, YANBU. Hope you had a nice Christmas anyway.

Just wondering if mothers day is like this too? My dh is rubbish at making a fuss and I get so upset as I feel he doesn't teach the kids to show mummy how much they all care. :( so this year I am going to write him a detailed list of how Mother's Day should be - bit for me but to make sure my kids grown up to care! Aibu?

LaGuardia ODFOD

thecliff that's so sad, and easily done, I left a pair of shoes I had saved up for and wanted for ages by a bench, I was gone for 5 minutes max before I realised and rushed back and they were gone. DP bought them for me ages later as a surprise, was the most touched I'd ever been. Hopefully yours will buy you another bottle and surprise you some time (fingers crossed!)

What a nasty fucking post LaGuardia to someone who has just shared what a horrible year they have had. What an empathetic soul you seem

OP sorry you are feeling sad. DH and I rarely buy each other presents. Financially it's a tough time as we have two DCs birthday the same month. We have started to book a weekend away at Xmas as our resent to each other. We do it for some time n Feb/march, so it is not to far way but far enough to make sure we've paid off the Christmas credit card and have enough to pay for the lovely hotel.
So I don't get anything either but I do have this to look forward to. Can you do this? Book something like a spa day or a treatment or a night away, that you pay for when you get it but have it booked so you know it's coming.
THECliff that is shit for you and DH. I remember when I was in college buying a CD for my parents that I thought they would love. It wasn't expensive but a fortune to me at the time. I wanted it just as a sort of general surprise tanks for everything gift. I was so gutted when I got home and realised I'd left it somewhere.

Don't worry about LaGuardia, her posts are like that with everyone. You can only show empathy if you've been shown it yourself.

timetogetup0630 someone said it was childish to expect gifts and I think that's just as nasty. It's not the gift that means so much but the thought and the feeling that you are appreciated. To have family and friends and yet have not one of them think to buy you a little something is awful.

I would save your money in future. If you bought any of them gifts then don't next year, instead save your money and spend it on a treat for you and your dd, like a trip to see Santa or a meal in a restaurant, just the two of you.

Christmas is what you make of it and now that you know that gifts aren't going to be forthcoming you can go all out to ensure that next Christmas is as special as it can be. And should some kind soul nominate you for Secret Santa, you may well find a few little treats for you under the tree after all

I got one present off my mum.

Nothing else. We have zero money at the minute.

It's ok. Next year when we have money (here's hoping) I will get spoilt

Do your parents/siblings not buy you a present?

Now we have children and have less disposable income with agree what to give each other and it's always something we need, rather than want (I had a new kitchen knife and sharpener). That's fine, but not particularly exciting.

I think it's important for our children to see us giving each other something for Christmas. I remember feeling really sad when neither of my parents had anything to open on Christmas day.

to all who didn't get presents. I never get any either.

Op here.
Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts and for sharing your experiences.
All I really wanted was a couple of wrapped, surprise gifts under the Christmas tree.

I did buy myself something small and useful, but I didn't gift wrap it !

Husband is a high earning cheapskate,and thinks christmas is a waste of money.
If I told him to buy me a specific item, he would. But I think after 20 years of marriage he ought to know me well enough to be able to buy me some small surprise gift.

My parents are dead.

In laws are ill.

Children are lazy teenagers with no cash to hand, hence my daughter using her imagination to make me a gift. She is always very loving.

Suspect I should be laying down a few ground rules here about Christmas and giving..........

Try not to feel to sad, there's always other years to be able to get presents, chin up

I'm a lone parent and I buy myself what I want!

No presents here either.

Lone parent and DC too young to buy anything and I had no spare cash to spend on myself. Close friends were also watching funds so we agreed not to swap presents.

It was my first christmas ever without a present, I'll admit I did feel quite sad!

Next year come to us with your lovely dd and leave the rest of them to it.

A waste of money? Showing your appreciation to your wife of 20 years who, by the looks of things, has worked hard bringing up two children and being a selfless, kind and thoughtful individual.

Also, just a thought, but how about next Christmas you volunteer to help out at a homeless shelter on Christmas Day? It might not be your idea of fun but it would send out a clear message to your family that you are not their skivvy because I bet you did everything for them on that day? It will make you feel better about your lot and your dh and kids will just have to survive without you for a while, it might make them a bit more grateful.

And as for your dh, I think you need a heart-to-heart with him. It's not the material goods you crave, it's the appreciation. Feeling loved and valued. He can at least do that, after all I bet he feels valued in his job and is told how good he is at it. Who tells you that? Who boosts your morale? If he refuses to do things differently then I think you need to make sure that you are somewhere else on Christmas Day, either volunteering or staying with friends - anywhere but at home where you run around after everyone whilst they take advantage. Let him sort out his own meal and let him feel what it's like to have no-one there on Christmas Day.

It makes me mad that even in this day and age, people are still treated like rubbish by those who are supposed to care the most

Aaaah,TheCliff' thanks.