Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 ··· 10 11

Original poster

To think ds will be eaten alive if he wears his team scarf to the match?

274 replies

BettyBotter · 01/01/2014 19:21

We live near Blue Town. Ds (15) supports Red City FC but has never been to a premiership match. For Christmas we got ds and the whole family tickets to see the match between Blue Town and Red City when the reds play here.

Ds is insistent that he will wear his Red City scarf and cheer loudly for the reds despite us being seated right in the middle of the Blue Town stands. He thinks because he's only 15 and cute the blue fans won't mind.

I haven't been to a match since 1986 for a while, so have no idea what to expect. Will we actually get out with all our limbs intact if ds does this? Should I ban him from wearing anything red or is football now family-friendly entertainment where the home crowd ruffle the young lad's head and congratulate him when his team thrash the home team?

(For context Blue Town is fairly well known as 'rough' and there were no options to get tickets in family friendly seats.)

Tips, advice and sneering derision constructive comment welcome.

OP posts:

Maryz · 01/01/2014 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Greythorne · 01/01/2014 22:36

SSD
You are the one defending it.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:37

for the last time maryz, I'm not defending it, I'm saying thats the way it is.....the best of it is I dont bloody like football, I just have a family of males who do!

MrsSteptoe · 01/01/2014 22:38

I'm sorry, SSD, I think you must be a plant because you haven't spelled any of your post wrong and everyone knows that people who follow football are mindless with no education and their knuckles are too smashed up from football hooliganism to type anyway. You're busted.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:38

ach fine, think what you want.

op, have you been to the game yet? or is it on saturday?

Sirzy · 01/01/2014 22:39

People know that's the way it is but your posts do come across as defending it and accepting that. I don't see how anyone can happily accept a system whereby people are judged by the team they support

MrsSteptoe · 01/01/2014 22:39

Ah, all clear now, SSD - xpost. You don't like football.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:43

mrssteptoe, you'd laugh if you could see me, dh and the kids watch football all the bloody time, on sky, btsport, whatever..and go to lots of games, I would be the last person talking about football online you could imagine, dh would laugh his socks off if he could read this! Unfortunately living in glasgow there is a whole unpleasant side of football anyone with half a brain protects their kids from, whilst accepting their kids and dh love a team and follow them everywhere

AnAdventureInCakeAndWine · 01/01/2014 22:43

You didn't say it wasn't wrong, ssd, true. You did very specifically say that it wasn't sad or ridiculous.

How many morally abhorrent things have been justified with a shrug and a "that's just the way it is" over the centuries?

Walber139 · 01/01/2014 22:44

This must be a BIG NO!!! I'm a big football fan & I'm lucky to know a few local premiership players, so I often go to games....I can't emphasis this enough, DO NOT LET HIM!! He would be put in to a dangerous situation!! Please don't let him

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 01/01/2014 22:48

mrssteptoe

fwiw, i think it's awful someonecwould be beaten and abused for being in the "wrong" end, but I don't think it would be enjoyable at all

MrsSteptoe · 01/01/2014 22:49

SSD I think there's a different flavour to cities that are divided by two dominant teams, perhaps - don't know for sure, haven't lived in one. We're in London and DH was such a fan that I went native and followed him into the tribe for his team, which happens to be our local team, which in turn happens to be premiership. But we have about 11 teams in London, and six in the premiership - I think the dilution across all those teams probably stops a lot of the more aggressive clashing. I'm only theorising, though.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:49

anadventure, I'm not hereto justify history, christ! I;m just saying to the op, as a mum of boys who go to games with dh, dont let your son wear the opposite coolurs to all those sitting around him, sad or ridiculous it may be, but it wont go down well with the other fans around him.

why does saying how it is at an actual game equal justifying something? I dont get it here. I'm saying how fans of football are like, I'm not saying anythings right or wrong, I'm saying what its like.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:53

mrssteptoe, yes I can see that, unfortunately in glasgow its green or blue and very very heated, theres areas you wouldnt walk in with the wrong colours, even the local asda in one town isnt popular cos their sign is green (seriously!!) and its hard when your kids and dh love one of the teams and you want them to enjoy their game, but all the time being aware or the real dangers being naive (like the op's son) can be.

ssd · 01/01/2014 22:54

sorry of the real dangers

SuperSaint · 01/01/2014 22:56

I've been to hundreds of football matches over the last 30 years. I can count on one hand the amount of times I have felt scared or intimidated. I don't hesitate to take my ds to matches home or away and he loves it. However there are 2 areas in a ground - home and away - and common sense suggests you do not go in the wrong end and show your allegiance. Football is very emotional and add alcohol into the mix and some people will act like idiots.
By the way, any spelling mistakes are the fault of the Kindle not my lack of education

ssd · 01/01/2014 23:00

thats one good thing about here, no alcohol is allowed in or sold during games (some of the fans are crazy enough)

flowery · 02/01/2014 06:36

"as an aside, they still have a neutral area at Fulham. I've sat there as any away fan in colours, next to home fans, on three or four occasions, and never seen any trouble. I've always wondered why Fulham are the only team (to my knowledge) with the confidence to try this and to make it work?"

Anecdotally, we know several people who buy Fulham season tickets despite supporting another premier league side. Fulham season tickets are apparently relatively cheap without a huge waiting list, and these people can get to see regular football including their own team when that team visits Fulham. Don't know if that's anything to do with it.

I'm intrigued at the conclusions that have been leaped to on this thread and interested to find out that I apparently am pathetic and think violence and abuse against teenagers is acceptable. All part of prejudice against football fans I suppose.

aderynlas · 02/01/2014 09:26

Supersaints post is spot on. Use your common sense at football same as you would anywhere else. For this season only, we have mates asking if we can get them seats with us. Not to support our team but to have a look at the away team. A very polite no is the only answer.

hels71 · 02/01/2014 09:33

Why is it that football has such a problem? I have been to many rugby matches, including internationals, wearing the colours of my teams and been sitting amongst the opposition with no issues at all. I have cheered when my team scored etc and nothing more than some friendly banter from the opposing fans. Why are football fans so different?

MrsSteptoe · 02/01/2014 09:34

Oh, I didn't read supersaint's post in that way - I read it that you behave discreetly if you're among the opposition. Not sure now!

MrsSteptoe · 02/01/2014 09:38

hels71 I have been thinking about this. I think I'd probably start with the notion that football has the biggest number of followers by far, and wonder if that is connected to the behaviour. Then i'd probably consider the idea that rugby and cricket are less affected by tribalism because it has a clear home in football, so that's where people with a tribal mentality tend to go, where those that take their tribalism to the extent of physical aggressive behaviour become a noticeable minority among the enthusiastic but not violent majority. Finally, I think if you deleted football from the world, aggressively tribal fans would all go to rugby or cricket and it would be start to be the centre of behavioural problems. In other words, with sport as with all things: it's possibly part of the human condition, and the object of its focus is getting the blame.

Genuinely interested to know if that makes any sense in answer to your question.

DottyDot · 02/01/2014 09:40

Sorry I haven't read all the comments and it's completely ridiculous but sadly, I wouldn't let him wear his scarf. It's really sad but I wouldn't take any chances and even a small 15 year old might be a bit vulnerable - if he was a tiny little one you might get away with it but not at 15.

Totally stupid that you can go to a cricket match and sit next to opposition team fans and have a good old chat (and probably the same with other sports as well - I only go to cricket matches!) but football is so bloody aggressive...

Marylou2 · 02/01/2014 09:41

I naively bought my husband, an Arsenal fan tickets to see them at Wigan last season. We sat with the Wigan fans in a really familt oriented area and the atmosphere was friendly and polite. Didn't wear scarves or cheer. Sounds like we had a lucky experience for some of these posts.

SilverApples · 02/01/2014 09:44

'I hate the attitude on here about football like its all scum that watch it, any 15 yr old that thinks he should be able to wear the opposite teams colours to a game need to wise up,'

Whereas to me, anyone that uses violence towards someone over which team they support would be scum.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 ··· 10 11