Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What would you have done in this situation?

21 replies

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:06

OK, so I meet an ex BF for lunch. We're still friends, were never going to be great lovers but have a strong friendship.
I call for him at his place and after a brief chat etc, we start cuddling/kissing. All good so far.
I ask him if he wants to go upstairs ( we are both free agents). He agrees and we tear off to the bedroom.
The snogging/fondling progresses to undressing etc, but oh, there is a knock at the door. I tell him to ignore it but no; he promptly gets dressed and goes downstairs.
Minutes later I hear the tinkling of tea cups.
20 minutes later I call my friend on my mobile. she tells me to get my arse downstairs and gather my things and leave. I wait perhaps anther 20 minutes, by which time I'm fuming. I get dressed ,sort my hair, and make up and proceed to the living room where he is chewing the fat with a friend.
The friend is aghast, " Stuart ,you never told me you had company". I replied, " Well it's clear he prefers a cuppa than a bit of afternoon delight, now may you move your car so I can get out".
Guest jumps in his car and lets me out, guest can't leave quickly enough.
Text on my phone about how I humiliated him ( ex) caused a big show down, we are only friends after all? Is this how you treat only friends?
Part of me thinks this is laughable, the other part of me thinks this is plain weird. Anyone got anything to say on this matter?

OP posts:
TheNightIsDark · 31/12/2013 00:10

What a rude bastard.

I would've done the same as you OP

Bogeyface · 31/12/2013 00:11

Your mistake was giving air time to this asshole.

His guests reaction tells you everything and thats why he is kicking off, because he knows he behaved badly. He is not a friend.

BlackDaisies · 31/12/2013 00:11

Yes it's weird, disrespectful and rude. He's not your friend and I would give him a wide berth in future.

ILoveAFullFridge · 31/12/2013 00:12

He was incredibly rude to you.

MaeveORave · 31/12/2013 00:12

I would never sleep with an x.
Either i dislike them, they dislike me, both, or it would b too humiliating. Dont sleep with somebody if their heart isnt really in it? Would prefer a cup of tea to sex with an ambivalent sex. That's just me of course.

pricklyPea · 31/12/2013 00:12

Bizarre
He's an ex for a reason. Don't humiliate yourself further. He left you upstairs while he had tea; was he expecting you to just stay there until he'd finished.

If you offer yourself up so easily then don't be shocked if people are less than respectful.

MaeveORave · 31/12/2013 00:12

Ambivalent ex i meant

Xoticdreamz · 31/12/2013 00:16

How rude. He is no friend , with benefits or not.

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:16

I am not in love with ex. The relationship was short lived and we both realised we should be friends only. I do feel humiliated and I'm cross that he acted the way he did. No way, do I consider him a friend now. I naïvely thought we could have had a bit of no strings attached sex, but he must have had other ideas.

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 31/12/2013 00:17

Not very gentlemanly

And passive aggressive IMO

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:20

My instincts tell me passive aggressive. God, do I feel cheap.

OP posts:
wheretoyougonow · 31/12/2013 00:26

Don't feel cheap. I think you handled it very well. I don't think he'll mess with you again! (don't respond to his texts)

LaurieFairyCake · 31/12/2013 00:31

You're not cheap. You're a liberated person who wanted an equal and consensual shag.

He lives in the dark ages and doesn't really like women much. His intention was to 'go one further' and try to humiliate.

LaurieFairyCake · 31/12/2013 00:32

He had plenty of choice remember. To call up to you and say Oh Derek's here, come down

To pop to the loo and whisper Derek's here, do you mind him knowing your here?

Bogeyface · 31/12/2013 00:33

You would only have been cheap if you had waited for him. He thought you were cheap. WRONG!

If you want a laugh and to make a point though, text him to ask for his friends number Wink :o

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:33

He's not that complicated, in fact I suspect he has Asperger's. But that is no excuse for treating me this way.

OP posts:
pricklyPea · 31/12/2013 00:35

He obviously thought he could keep you up their like some sort of possession or weird control. Good you've seen this now before wasting any more time on the idiot.

It's embarrassing.
Arsehole.

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:39

I had to go downstairs for my boots, coat and car keys, it was so humiliating.

OP posts:
pricklyPea · 31/12/2013 00:50

Just forget about it now. We've all done something we regret.
Sounds like his friend wasn't impressed with him either

Typical that he's annoyed with you, little turd.

AmIatwat · 31/12/2013 00:57

yeah, I'm going to put it all behind me. I'm not that upset, just bewildered. Yes he's a prize turd alright.

OP posts:
Xoticdreamz · 31/12/2013 01:18

I thought your quip on leaving was great actually . Don't feel cheap, head high, nose in air please :)

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread