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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in wanting to do bad things to this selfish cow?

43 replies

RageRageRageAndRageAgain · 30/12/2013 23:36

My poor little PFB managed to pull a metal pizza tray down on top of himself earlier. It has sharp edges and the corner has cut his beautiful little face :( I took him to the Acute Clinic (not in the UK) which is like the out of hours/minor injuries clinic in the UK. There's no triage as it's not A&E, that's down the road at the main hospital. You take a number and wait your turn.

There were 5 people ahead of us when we got there. The first was called in just as we arrived. The second asked if anyone minded, nobody did, so he swapped his ticket with mine so that the very distressed baby covered in blood could be seen quicker. Then another woman arrives with her mother and takes a ticket. We get called in and as I go to enter the treatment room, with my little one crying in my arms, she pushes past me and insists that her mother needs to be seen first as she's feeling very unwell and shouldn't have to wait as she's elderly, it's late and she needs to get home.

The nurse was so stunned she just closed the door with this woman and her mother in the room and then treated my little one in the corridor. How can someone be so completely up their own arse. If it were life and death I could understand, but then she wouldn't be at the acute clinic, she'd be at A&E down the road.

OP posts:
Original poster
RageRageRageAndRageAgain · 31/12/2013 01:08

FFS! You're making stuff up now just to be right and make me feel like shit. THERE WAS NO DYING PARENT!

OP posts:
Original poster
RageRageRageAndRageAgain · 31/12/2013 01:15

Could be they didn't know where various types of medical places are in the area, and just went to the first one they found.

None of the medical centres are drop in, not even A&E. You go to the one you're sent to by the triage nurse you have to ring first, your GP (or the emergency operator). They have to 'book you in' before you go.

OP posts:
MidniteScribbler · 31/12/2013 01:16

So you went in and were fifth in the line, then someone swapped with you and you were allowed to go in second. If they hadn't swapped, then you'd have been waiting even longer than you did. And when you were seen (more quickly than you would normally have been), someone came in and was a bit of a twerp, but the staff still treated your son before them anyway.

So what is your actual complaint?

Bettercallsaul1 · 31/12/2013 01:18

So sorry to hear about your little one, OP. Whatever the rights and wrongs of the other lady barging in, you are not being unreasonable to feel so emotional and protective of your baby - that's the nature of mother love. It goes straight to our core when our child is injured and this is a totally normal and proper reaction, showing how closely you are bonded.

Comfort yourself by concentrating on the positives. It was very fortunate the cut was beside your son's eye, rather than on the eye itself and, given the capacity of children's cells to regenerate, it is likely that he will be left with no visible scar.

And, to maintain your faith in human nature, remember that all the other patients in the waiting room wanted your son to be seen first - there is always the exception in any situation but don't let that blind you to the good feelings of the majority.

Bettercallsaul1 · 31/12/2013 01:19

So sorry to hear about your little one, OP. Whatever the rights and wrongs of the other lady barging in, you are not being unreasonable to feel so emotional and protective of your baby - that's the nature of mother love. It goes straight to our core when our child is injured and this is a totally normal and proper reaction, showing how closely you are bonded.

Comfort yourself by concentrating on the positives. It was very fortunate the cut was beside your son's eye, rather than on the eye itself and, given the capacity of children's cells to regenerate, it is likely that he will be left with no visible scar.

And, to maintain your faith in human nature, remember that all the other patients in the waiting room wanted your son to be seen first - there is always the exception in any situation but don't let that blind you to the good feelings of the majority.

MinnesotaNice · 31/12/2013 01:22

Don't know what country your in OP, but at least in both the UK and the US there are HUGE GINORMOUS signs that say what services are available. Especially for an A&E!

The not knowing where various types of medical places are in the area, and just went to the first one they found just doesn't wash.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that they were just rude fuckers for pushing in front of you.

Original poster
RageRageRageAndRageAgain · 31/12/2013 01:26

Bettercallsaul your post has triggered the release for all my pent up tears. I can't bear to see him hurting. He's dozed off again now but is still wimpering in his sleep. It's breaking my heart.

OP posts:
BlingBang · 31/12/2013 01:36

I think what some of us have said is that whether it's A&E or not - some medical places and situations can bring out the worst in folk and major stresses and emotions. As I said I nearly lost it big time in the queue in the chemist and with the doctors receptionist.

Just might have been easier for the OP to consider this rather than think that the woman was just a rude, selfish person. Might stop her being upset and seething, and I'm a seether so I probably would have felt the same if it was my child.

Bettercallsaul1 · 31/12/2013 11:01

I am glad that you are managing to cry, OP - it is the best thing for you. Cry as much as you need and get all the anger, grief, and frustration out. You will feel much better as a result - tears are truly therapeutic and a vital part of the emotional healing process.

The strong emotions you are feeling do you credit - they are the other side of the love and protectiveness you feel for your baby. He is a very lucky little boy to have such a devoted mother, and he will reap the benefit of your love for him in the years to come.

Accidents cannot be prevented - they are an unfortunate part of life, and every child will have their share. Very, very few children live through their childhood without several visits to A and E. But it is not the accident that matters - it is the way a parent deals with it, and you did exactly the right thing, immediately taking your son to the appropriate place and, when there, not hesitating to fight his corner. You are an excellent mother and should feel very proud of yourself.

This emergency will pass, and your baby will be none the worse for it in the long run. But what this crisis has brought out is your strength and determination to protect your child and that is an excellent sign for the future.

Doodledumdums · 31/12/2013 19:43

I absolutely do not think you are being unreasonable. I am surprised at the responses on this thread.

Your baby is 8 months, can't talk (and so can't explain how he feels etc) and had a head injury which was bleeding, on what planet does that not take priority over an elderly woman who walked in??!!

Besides which, it wouldn't have hurt the woman to just be polite to you, you must have been distressed and did not need her rudeness.

YANBU- I think people are looking for a backstory where there isn't one.

summerlands · 31/12/2013 19:47

Yanbu.

StephenKatzCrackerHat · 31/12/2013 19:56

You poor thing, I can see why you were upset. I'm 99% certain that woman was simply a rude cow.

Have lots of cuddles tonight and comfort yourself with the fact that for every rude cow out there, their are also several people willing to let an upset little child go in front of them without question.

MammaTJ · 31/12/2013 20:31

Focus more on the nice people who were happy to let you jump in front than the nasty one that pushed in. There are certainly more nice people in the world than horrible ones.

moldingsunbeams · 31/12/2013 21:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

depankrispaneven · 31/12/2013 21:50

What on earth is all this nonsense about how the woman and her mother might have needed to be seen more urgently? The old woman ca,n't have been that ill if she walked in. And surely if you're that concerned the way to deal with it is to talk to the person at the desk about whether you can jump the queue, not just making an assumption. I hope the nurse made them wait till their proper turn in the queue.

AngelaDaviesHair · 31/12/2013 21:56

You are not being remotely unreasonable. The woman was rude and inconsiderate.

spookyskeleton · 31/12/2013 22:00

I cannot believe some of the responses on this thread Shock some people are just rude, ignorant and selfish and there doesn't alwats have to be mitigation for their behaviour!

The OP said that the reasons the woman gave for pushing in were because it was late and she had to get home, not because her mum was at deaths door so I think it is fairly reasonable to assume she was just rude!

Hope your baby is ok Sad Sad - this will all be a bad dream this time next year Smile

CrapBag · 31/12/2013 22:51

Yanbu! They were fucking rude and clearly the nurse thought so too.

Hope your baby is OK.

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