To think its not called nagging if you have to ask more than once?

[roses2]

Why when you give someone advance notice and it gets closer and closer to the deadline and they still show no signs of doing it, you suddenly become a nag for having to repeatedly ask when they are going to pull their finger out?

What other way is there for going about this without being called a nag?

I wish I knew. I'm sick of having to remind people to do things and being called a nag. But then finding them
Not done because they forgot.

Grow a penis? nagging seems to be generally a bit misogynistic

Yup, more than one reminder is called nagging, sometimes the first mention is called nagging too, (horrid ex). Well, JUST DO IT THEN if you dont want reminding.
But you wont win.

Anyone else fed up of then going to do the ask to be told "i was just about to do that" grr.

Either you asked them to do it to save yourself time in which case as you have finished what you were doing you might as well do it.

Or you say "it's ten o clock at night, just how much longer so I leave it before realising it's not actually gonna get done"

Drives me frickin crazy

'Nagging' is a lovely way of putting women in their place.

My ex accused me of being a nag when we were together. I said if he'd just bloody do it/or not there wouldn't be anything to fucking nag him about!!

The first and only time I was called a nag I went into a massive teensy rage and told DP to "never use that misogynistic word in my presence again" and to do his f*ing job. Was probably quite extreme but it's been very effective!

I have just stopped. I will not tolerate being accused of nagging so if things don't get done (that don't affect me) then they don't get done. I am responsible for myself and my DS as he is too young, but I will not be responsible for a grown up in full command of their faculties. So I sort the stuff that directly impacts on me and DS, and ask once and once only about everything else.

Clothes that don't get put in wash basket don't get washed. Appointments don't get made. Birthday cards don't get bought. I know they need doing but then again so does he. Why should it be my responsibility to sort it?

Not my problem. I am not his mother or his maid.

Men can revert easily to mothered teenage boy if allowed. I don't allow it anymore.

The catalyst for all this refusal to fit in the "her indoors" box came when DS was born and the realisation that my perceived "job" had suddenly expanded to fill all my time 24/7.

Men can revert easily to mothered teenage boy if allowed. I don't allow it anymore

I think your right there. I feel like I have three children sometimes and I can't trust anything to be done when I need it done because he will point prove and do it in his time. [ angry]

Or get annoyed cos I go and do it anyway.

Callani Mon 30-Dec-13 12:20:06

"never use that misogynistic word in my presence again" and to do his f*ing job.

DH doesn't often say it but on occasion when he does it is the singular most enraging thing on earth. I plan to use this ^^ next time.