Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU RE cleaner?

27 replies

Elfina · 29/12/2013 10:46

I'd not given it much thought until my SIL mentioned she thought I was being UR!

I haven't ripped my cleaner any kind of Christmas bonus. I bought her a box of £5 chocolates and gave her a card. Apparently I was meant to pay her double? Sounds like I've made a big faux pas? I gave her the sane gift I gave to the amazing key workers who look after my PFB at nursery, so to me it seems weird that I'd give the cleaner more? I hope I don't sound like a brat, but It's a push to afford £80 a month for a cleaner anyway, so couldn't really afford a bonus.

DH works a lot and I'm finishing a doctorate and working with a 1 year old DD - having a cleaner just about stops us completely descending into chaos...

WIBU?

OP posts:
ViviPru · 29/12/2013 10:49

I always thought tips were discretionary. Perhaps I'm wrong...

Nancy66 · 29/12/2013 10:50

Most people will tip their cleaner. But if you can't afford it then you can't afford it and the chocolates were a nice gesture.

Lottiedoubtie · 29/12/2013 10:51

I wouldn't tip double, but I did give an extra tenner. Cleaner seemed very pleased with that.

I think you've acknowledged cleaner at Christmas and that's ok.

Mikkii · 29/12/2013 10:58

I have never tipped my cleaner. I do buy her children a present each. The RRP of the 2 presents together was £30, but cost me less.

HandragsNGladbags · 29/12/2013 10:59

I pay her for the week she doesn't come, so I still paid her even though she didn't come last week as it was Christmas eve.

Bakerof3pudsxx · 29/12/2013 10:59

I don't tip anyone.
Ever.

Mikkii · 29/12/2013 11:00

Incidentally my cleaner does also buy my 3DC a gift too. She bought H&M trousers for DS and an H&M cardigan for each of the girls.

A few months ago she also gave me some school uniform for DD1 as her daughters school had become an academy and changed colours.

Rumplestinkskin · 29/12/2013 11:02

I'm a cleaner and I haven't had a Christmas bonus or even a box of chocs for a few years........... but, I'm treated very well by my employers, given holiday pay and a decent hourly rate which is far more important.

You've acknowledged her hard work and that is ample IMO

BonaDea · 29/12/2013 11:02

I used to pay her the week's money plus the same again in a card. But as we're now paying £30 a week I thought that was crazy so I put £20 in the card.

As someone else said, tho, it is discretionary and there are no rules. I just figure she doesn't earn much and does a hard job so I'd give her some cash. Plus she no doubt loses work at this time of year as people don't want the cleaner coming when they have family staying etc.

MrsGeorgeMichael · 29/12/2013 11:05

These threads always interest me - are you all talking about your self employed cleaner?

WooWooOwl · 29/12/2013 11:11

A tip is always what you want to give, and it is never compulsory. There isn't a rule about how much tip to give, because that would defeat the object of a tip being in return for particularly good service.

It's a nice thing to do if the cleaner has gone above and beyond what you have expected as a basic level of service which you are already paying for, and you have done that by giving her chocolate and a card.

You are right that it would seem crazy to give a cleaner more than you give the people that care for your child.

Iwannalaylikethisforever · 29/12/2013 11:12

I worked as a cleaner whilst at college, never expected a tip or bonus, but was very happy to receive lovely tin of biscuits, I'm easily pleased ....
Buying gifts for cleaners children is very thoughtful.
I think you made a nice gesture, is irrelevant what others do, that's their choice, nothing is compulsory in these circumstances.

PublicEnemyNumeroUno · 29/12/2013 11:16

I'm a cleaner. Some people gave me cash for Christmas (not double my wage, one gave £10 in a card, one gave £30 in a card) another gave me a box of chocs and a present each for my kids.

I was greatful for each of those things because I wasn't expecting anything.

If somebody is not happy with a box of chocs then I think they are ungreatful

Xfirefly · 29/12/2013 11:23

used to be a cleaner. never expected a bonus. always had a box of chocolates or biscuits and was very grateful but never expected it.

NightFallsFast · 29/12/2013 11:23

I gave a tin of biscuits and a card too. I'd read about paying the cleaner double, but she's only been coming fr 3-4 weeks so I thought that was a bit excessive.

Joysmum · 29/12/2013 11:25

Tipping is moving more and more out of favour, and I'm glad.

Tip if you want to, it shouldn't be expected.

WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 29/12/2013 11:28

handrags why didn't your cleaner work Christmas Eve? It's a normal working day (I was in the office)

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 29/12/2013 11:43

Lots of people didn't/don't work Christmas Eve, the cleaner is self employed, she can choose not to work when it suits her. Odd question.

I don't have a cleaner at the moment, but when I did I paid them for the days they didn't come over Christmas/New Year & gave them a token present (wine/chocs) of if they came on those days gave them a token present and/or cash depending on how long they'd been with us/how good they were. No set rules - ignore your SIL.

PublicEnemyNumeroUno · 29/12/2013 11:46

I didn't work Christmas eve, I finished on the 20th and am going back to work on the 3rd. Perks of being your own boss.

Bowlersarm · 29/12/2013 11:46

I gave my lovely cleaner a weeks salary as her Christmas gift.

Flossyfloof · 29/12/2013 11:47

I have sometimes given my cleaner an extra tenner, sometimes a box of chocs. She has often given me gifts which I really don't like and I was a bit relieved when she became short of money and hasn't given me anything for a year or two - I hate the thought of anyone wasting money. I gave her a little pearl bracelet this year. Actually she bought me chocs and wine for my birthday, I feel a bit mean now. I will get her something nice for her birthday I think. But I don't think it is a good thing to set a precedent anyway for tipping or giving. Give what you like if you like. There is no law that says you have to give anything. I don't pay her if she doesn't come.

Flossyfloof · 29/12/2013 11:49

I did give her the full money a few weeks ago when she wasn 't able to do the full time but came anyway. I feel a bit less tight now.

NearTheWindmill · 29/12/2013 11:56

Always give ours an extra week's money. Would feel dreadful not doing that. She didn't work for me last week and for me the extra week feels like the week's paid holiday that I get and therefore only fair. Although she has worked for us for years.

Original poster
Elfina · 29/12/2013 12:11

Thanks everyone, been interesting to see responses. Yes, she's self employed. Interestingly, she's a lovely person, but a bit of a rubbish cleaner, which is why I'd baulk at giving her double. To be honest I've considered getting someone else but I'd feel so guilty, as I'm sure no one does a cleaning job for the love of it...

OP posts:
banana87 · 29/12/2013 12:15

I used to tip about £20 to my cleaner. This year I've changed cleaners and get only started in nov so they got nothing, not even a card!

Swipe left for the next trending thread