to think that if you post about something deemed to be trivial it doesn't necessarily mean

[babybelle11]

That you need to get a grip if you only have this to worry about.
No one knows what the op's life is about. She may be posting about something trivial but could still have other problems.

YANBU. But some people like to put the boot in wherever possible.

YANBU

My pet hate on MN is any variation on "First world problem, much?!"

And anyway, how fucking depressing would MN be if all anyone posted about was serious issues?

There would be no penguins, no pom bears, no slagging off the Weasleys for being bad parents etc etc!

It's why posters have to put (lighthearted) in the title.

Those put-down responses say more about the responder than the OP usually.
YANBU.

Yanbu but you know how the competitive miserying is on here sometimes

OP - I agree with you completely.

I once posted a bit of a whinge about my neighbour. Just airing my moany mind. Some random mumsnetter told me I was petty. Petty! Moi!

I will never get over this. Ever.

No, it doesn't necessarily mean you need to get a grip. But it might well be the perception of some posters from the information given that you do in fact need to get a grip, and posting about not getting the perfect expensive gift from your third cousin twice removed/your kid not having the star role in their infant school nativity play/etc etc on a forum titled AIBU? does rather invite that response.

YANBU and I hate the fact people now feel obligated to put in "Light-hearted" so that hatchet-faced soul-less dementors don't leap in there and start passing the OP a grip.

And in most cases anyone with half a brain can work out that whatever trivial bollocks is in the OP is actually a displacement for something much bigger. There's nearly always more going on.

And in most cases anyone with half a brain can work out that whatever trivial bollocks is in the OP is actually a displacement for something much bigger. There's nearly always more going on

Well done on your psychic powers.

YANBU. I agree.

My pet hate on MN is that when a poster has a complaint about a parent someone always comes along and says something along the lines of 'be grateful they're not dead - mine is'.

No one ever says that about any other person to person or relationship problems.

No psychic powers, tragically - and the "most cases" is probably over-stating it. Some posts are just trivial - but then why the hell not?

But you often see a post about something fairly petty - and before long you work out that the petty thing is part of something much bigger.

I agree. Also hate when people come on to a reasonably phrased AIBU thread and froth at the OP about "getting so worked up" about the issue.

Invrariably the only person who is worked up is the one who is making that accusation.

The one that pisses me off is where OP is having a good rant about a relative, and someone chips in with 'Think yourself lucky, I'd do anything to have my mother/MIL/whichever back but she/he's passed on'.

Of course I get how bloody awful one feels when you lose someone. For the first year or two after my dad died, and then my brother, it was a very very raw place, and guilt about not having spent enough time with the deceased is a classic part of it too. But I managed never to bring my feelings about my loss into someone else's thread about the utter infuriating-ness of their still-very-much-alive relative.

I don't think people should have to put lighthearted in the title.

I think MNHQ should be allowed to forcibly add 'bossytwat" to the name of anyone who seriously posts "is this all you have to worry about" or ''firstworldproblem" to someone who's obviously just passing the time with lighthearted trivia.

And enforce a week long no-name change to that person so they have to just live with it.

Not against trivial posts, hassled, but sometimes posters do seem both to be posting about something trivial AND being very unreasonable about whatever the issue is. Given the name/nature of the forum, I don't understand why some people seem to get awfully upset when others say that the OP is being clearly unreasonable. They asked the question!

And yes, if a poster is clearly being lighthearted then that's one thing. But posts about trivial matters are often far from lighthearted, and in that situation I don't think it's unreasonable for somebody to respond that the matter in question isn't a big deal.

Oh and my mum is driving me completely bananas at the moment. Yes, I am going 'Oh shit' when I see it's her on the phone. And yes, I also know I will feel massive guilt in some years time, when the phone goes and I know it will never be her again, to tell me in exhaustive detail about the lives of her neighbours, the bowel movements of her dog, and a resume of the plot of last night's Coronation Street.

YANBU.

Love the bossytwat suggestion!

I don't like the recent phenomenon of "(lighthearted)"in thread titles.

But I suppose it's one of the things that arrived with lots of new posters not so long ago (along with much more 'lol'- ing, more 'huns' and more casual blasphemy).

The site is only what people post, and if the PO are in the ascendancy now, that's how it is. Harking back to what the site was like a few months ago (or years, or whatever time you focus on as better) isn't going to make on whit of difference to what new joiners bring to the site.

But you future posts might...

I love the bossytwat idea! Will report your post with a recommendation they implement it.

The thing I hate is when someone says something (usually passive aggressive) and follows it by "No?" I can just see the head tilt - makes me want to smack them.

hatchet-faced soul-less dementors

That is a wonderous title for them.
I am going to nick that and post it when some snidey begrudger pops up on a thread.

Some posters do need to get a grip though tbh.

I also hate it when posters put 'name changed, regular on here, Pom bear etc' to justify their thread because there will invariably some accusations of bridge dwelling.

And 'lighthearted', yes, because we have to justify ourselves to everyone. Ffs.