I have been living away from family for some time and have recently arrived back in the place where most of them are. I seem to have been having a strained relationship with my sister and am now wondering whether its time to let go of the "but she is my sister" sentiment and just face it that the relationship is just over.
My sister is quite a shallow person in lots of ways, she is a bit of a social climber and very concerned about status and appearance and material things. I am older, grumpy and frumpy . (see Im not just pointing out her flaws).
I have put some weight on whilst away and this obviously bothers her, as does my lack of need to demonstrate my income with outward appearance.
I find that she visibly sneers at me and often smirks when I say something and then generally snaps at things I say. She comes "geared up" and I see her physically "get her back up" when she somes near me. It could just be simple things like all making dishes in the kitchen at Xmas and she makes a nasty put down at the way I am preparing something, put downs about my professional expertise or about where I may have bought something or the smirking. Its certainly wearing me down.
Im quite sad , as she is my sister. DH reckons that isnt relevant and that if this is the way someone is going to be, then I should let go. He sees it too and , after I brought it up, agrees that she does "look down her nose at me".
AIBU in thinking even sisters need to be "let go"?