to be hunting for a microwaveable turkey dinner for DD

[nessus]

Your honour(s),

Although DD(12) is an unrepentant carnivore, I plead to be excused from the botheration that is xmas dinner assemblage.

The defence offers up that I am a veggie that hardly eats at the best of time. We are a 2 person household. I paid for DD to have xmas dinner at school before breaking up. I have offered to drive her to her dad's for xmas dinner and spend the day after she opens her pressies at home with me. We are spending 27-29th with family where she will have a zillion post xmas turkey honouring dinners. I am a lazy bint. I will gag if I touch raw meat (it's bad enough making meat containing pack lunches).

As a concession, I am willing to go hunting for a microwave meal after I drop her off to guitar lesson in a few minutes. Yes, I am the saddo that intends to shout surprise as I offer up a ready meal to my child on xmas day...Though I may be judged harshly by the jury, I ask that counsel refrains from calling SS upon sentence being passed.

Marks and spencer do a perfectly good microwaveable turkey dinner.

Right you've chosen to be veggie, fair enough. But at 12 your daughter as the mind to chose for herself, so would like meat. As her mother it's not unreasonable for her to expect you to cook her some meat.

Its christmas, you could have gotten her a nice little chicken or turkey as a nice meal.

Would you say you have a healthy relationship with food OP?

I think it's a bit mean to give her a microwave dinner, especially on Christmas day. and even moreso when she suggested turkey slices which you seem to have ignored.

Feel a bit sorry for her.

What do you in the holidays usually?

Are you relying on the school dinners or do you cook? I think perhaps you need to make an effort with the vege cooking because there is no reason why your dd shouldn't eat and enjoy them and she shouldn't miss the meat that much either.

I think in all of this the biggest issue I have is that you are asking today, 23rd dec.

Christmas doesn't move. You have had 12mths to work this out nicely. Therefore you ARE lazy, silly or any of that kind of language aren't you?

This whole issue should not have crept up on you and said BOO! Today should it?!?!?

M&S have ready prepped turkey drumsticks that comes in its own foil tray. They also do mini mushroom wellingtons & other veggie mains for you to eat to

This really isn't about turkey.

Yes yabu and a bit lazy buy yourself s but roast and your dd a turkey portion in a tray. Why should she miss out because of your food choices.

i feel sorry for her too :-(

And saying you've offered to take her to her dads to spend the day there instead... just because you're not willing to cook a bit of meat? Or get some packed slices?

The more I read it the more I am

all sounds a bit joyless and self absorbed on your part op and yes you do sound like you have issues with food.

It isnt about turkey and unfortunately with a young teen its sending the wrong message about food - not the vegetarianism bit but the not eating bit. They pick up and copy these ideas so easily.

LIDL do a very nice poultry pate for dogs. Comes in a foil container. Detach from container onto a plate, microwave, add pre cooked vegetables, cover in Bisto type gravy...sorted!

My Jack Russell loves it...she is twelve years old too.

We're having Chinese takeaway.
I also don't each much sometimes when my IBS is playing up, however I have explained this to my 12yr old DD so she does understand.

Your DD is if an age where your attitudes to food could do her very real harm, and that is without the thought of a mother who doesn't wish to cook her food she would enjoy, one of the greatest enjoyments of family life.

I just think it's a huge shame not to be sharing a meal together on what is supposed to be a special day. I understand you don't want to cook meat, so cook all the accompanying bits and buy her a packet of sliced turkey, like she suggested.
I have to say that anything less really gives the impression that you don't give much of a shit

We're having Chinese takeaway.
I also don't each much sometimes when my IBS is playing up, however I have explained this to my 12yr old DD so she does understand.

Is Chinese takeaway really better for IBS than meat and veg?

As another poster has pointed out M&S do nice turkey dinner ready meal. I had one many moons ago when I was working all over Christmas and so couldn't travel to see my family for a proper xmas dinner. Would she be happy with that? Christmas doesn't have to revolve around food, the OP can obviously take it or leave it.

Sorry Sooperdooper, I meant generally when my IBS is bad I don't eat much, it's ok atm.
We have chosen the takeaway dishes together, and I have bought all the traditional nibbles too (smoked salmon, pate, cheeses, pickles, mince pies, choc etc).
I am planning to do the big dinner for us on Saturday, this just takes a bit of pressure off.
I've had a tough few months, with my health and also lost my Dad in October so making things easier on myself

Not really fair for your dd to suffer because of your eating disorder, is it?

Buy sliced roast turkey from any deli and serve with usual accompaniments.

It's Christmas Day, the least you could do is sit down to a proper dinner with your DD.

Presenting her with a ready meal that she has to sit and eat alone,whilst you decide whether you may or may not eat a bowl of muesli doesn't make for a Happy Christmas IMO!!!

You need to seek help for yourself, I think. Your attitude towards food sounds unhealthy and could cause disordered eating in your DD. I think your veganism is probably more a self-harming thing than either a principled stand or a healthy one.

Your poor poor daughter :(