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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask if any of you are a doctor?

83 replies

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 09:31

Sorry but I'm besides myself with worry. I'm abit of a panicker.
What started yesterday as a simple conversation with my husband about std check has escalated into me thinking I may have had chlamydia for a number of years and throughout both my pregnancies gone completely undiagnosed (Dh told me he hadn't ever been checked)
Im worried now that both my children could have it if I end up having anything.
My Dd is almost 5 and ds is 6 months. Can't get tested till Monday and I feel so worried.

OP posts:
Writerwannabe83 · 22/12/2013 11:29

I didn't think it was tested for in pregnancy as isn't chlamydia only detected via swabs as opposed to blood tests? I certainly didn't have any vaginal swabs taken. IN my Green Notes there is a list of 11 things that can be tested for, all of them have been circled yes except the chlamydia screen. It has been circled No and the reason given says: "Age".
I guess as I'm viewed by professionals as being outside the age that is considered risky for chlamydia.

tiredandtiredandtired · 22/12/2013 11:29

Chlamydia is only tested in pregnancy if you are under 25. The only std checks normally are for hepatitis and hiv. Try not to panic, get tested and I'm sure you are worrying over nothing

nostress · 22/12/2013 15:23

Op. Please go to GP and talk not about std worries but about the anxiety you are facing. I had similar experience following the birth of my second son. It was bascially OCD around health worries. Constantly checking google for symptoms etc. It is a fairly normal reaction for your body to start to worry to protect your babies. But in the modern world there is less real things to worry about so all the worry gets channeled into more random areas. That is, you are not fighting for survival hunting/finding food/looking out for preditors etc. You have to basically ignore the urge to seek reassurance. If not there will be another random worry. The more you seek to reassure youself the worse it becomes. My worries lasted for years but they did get better with help.

TheBigJessie · 22/12/2013 16:05

Either go to the doctor, and get your health anxiety sorted out, or start taking lots of science and maths qualifications to help you assess the the significance of google information and How Stuff Works. The former is easier and quicker, and less likely to backfire.

Neither of your children have chlamydia-related infertility, I promise. My mother developed a similar fear a few years ago, after an ex from before I was born told her he'd had it. My mother started insisting she must have had chlamydia too, and that it was responsible for all kinds of things that were actually caused by her 40 a day smoking habit and that I must be infertile too, as a result. I told her what people on this thread have told you, but what she needs is support with the source of the anxiety.

AnyBagsofOxfordFuckers · 22/12/2013 16:18

Your Dc cannot get it from you. It is called a SEXUALLY transmitted infection because it has to be transmitted sexually. The genitals of babies passing through your vagina when you gave birth (I am presuming they were vaginal deliveries) does not count. And consider this - if you have had it for ages, and it affects fertility, as you worry about your DD, then how would you have got pregnant yourself? You are simply not thinking logically, and it makes no scientific sense either.

You do need to see your GP urgently, but for your anxiety and intrusive thoughts. If you are checking google for symptoms, trying to convince yourself of the worst, imagining your children dying from a sniffle, finding it difficult to merely look at your DD without thinking you have ruined her life, etc., etc., then you need help. It has clearly taken over your life. I have anxiety and OCD (the intrusive thought kind, too), so I do know what you are going through.

But please heed this: whilst you are working yourself up worrying about non-existent or impossible awful or fatal health scenarios for your DC, you are actually adversly affecting them. Paradoxically, by obsessively sorrying about protecting them from harm in this extreme way, your anxiety will start to harm them. It is not a healthy, positive way for them to live, and could make them nervous and feel like life is unsafe, etc. Again, I know this because my own mum has always been the same way as you describe. It has really badly affected her children, even into adulthood.

stubbs0412 · 22/12/2013 16:27

How old r u? Don't have 2 tell us but when I had my booking in appt last year all under 25's are tested for std inc clym.
I'm too old .... I wasn't tested, don't think it's standard & prob depends on postcode lottery .

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 17:28

I was under 25 with my first but not my second x

OP posts:
Writerwannabe83 · 22/12/2013 17:48

Well if you were Chlamydia free the first time round then it's safe to assume you don't have it now either - unless you or hubby have been naughty with other people between having your 2 children? Xmas Grin

MrsWedgeAntilles · 22/12/2013 18:30

OP, I agree with r3dsquirrel and what I said on your last thread mirrors what she said.
Please stop worrying, get yourself off to a GUM clinic, get tested. Even if you are positive you won't have given your DCs genital chlamydia. If you have it yourself, you and your DH will be treated with a single dose of antibiotics and that will be that, end of story as far as the chlamydia goes.
However, like everyone else I'm a bit worried about how anxious you are. Even with reassurance from folk who work in the field on two separate threads you still feel very uncomfortable and fearful about this. I've been where you are and I strongly recommend seeking help for this as well. Testing for STIs will make you feel better in the short term but the anxiety will come back sooner or later, just about something else.

Skogkat · 22/12/2013 18:38

I would advise you to go to the GP. I have health anxiety. It can be very hard to recognise but, especially on your first thread, there were things you were posted that resonated with me iyswim, especially with the obsessive worrying, over reasonable thoughts, but taking it further kind of.

rootypig · 22/12/2013 18:41

AnyBags I agree that the OP is extremely and overly anxious. But it can be transmitted in some form to DC, and you can have chlamydia without being infertile.

WhereIsMyHat · 22/12/2013 18:44

I found out I had chlamydia after having my first child. I must have had it since my first cheating arsehole of a boyfriend. I was assured by my doctor that my child was fine and had not contracted it.

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 20:29

Whereismyhat did they test your dc to see if she/he had it?
Also how old was dc when you found out?

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Kundry · 22/12/2013 20:56

OP, I'm another doctor here and I'm worried that you are ignoring the clear advice here that your DC haven't got it and don't need testing and instead asking more questions.

What you almost certainly have is health anxiety, where you think you need more information to reassure you but actually more information leads to more questions and more worries. I think you need to see you GP about this and not the chlamydia (which your children have not got).

harriet247 · 22/12/2013 21:01

Have you ever thought that you might have OCD too worried? I had it before pregnancy but im way worse after giving birth- I check things compulsively and I get intrusive thoughts if im stressed/tired etc but im trying my best to get on top of it and try and squash the anxiety that I have. Fwiw all my compulsion s are based aroynd keeping dd safe too x

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 22/12/2013 21:06

OP you are ignoring the advice of medically trained people (which you asked for!) who have told you your DCs won't have it, but at the most babies can get conjunctivitis.

If you want to get tested them go ahead but you do have to deal with your anxiety over health issues, which you do need to chat to your go about.

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 21:09

I think I do have ocd and or an anxiety disorder.
If any if you where to ask my the things Iv asked on here I could give you a clear level headed answer and come across like I don't worry. However if there's abt chance something might hurt my dcs I just turn into this mess!
I have serious germ issues (don't like public toilets, lift buttons, door handles etc) but I never let my dcs see that. I do worry it will affect them though. I know I'm probably in need I'd some help but u feel too ashamed to go to the gp. I want to come across as strong and confident and like I can handle all this but it does rule my life abit..

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tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 21:11

Sorry, didn't mean to be rude and ignore anyone. I'm very very grateful for any advice people have given.
I feel like my doctor would just laugh at me if I went in and said I'm worried all the time.

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TheBigJessie · 22/12/2013 21:17

tooworriedforwords
There is absolutely no way that your children's internal reproductive organs would have been affected by you having chlamydia. And you have no evidence you even have chlamydia yourself!

if I told you it was raining outside, would you worry my children were getting soaked indoors? That is what your question is like.

To contract chlamydia, you have to have your genitalia doing jiggy things with someone else's who is infected, i.e. sexual contact.

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 21:22

I think my hormones play a big role in my anxiety. I seemed to calm down abit after I stopped breastfeeding Dd (might just have been because she was older and had stopped worrying as much by then)
Currently breastfeeding 6 month old ds and plan to do so until he's 2-3 so I need to get it under control..

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TheBigJessie · 22/12/2013 21:23

Love, just seen your last post. It is your doctor's job to help people with their health problems. You being anxious after a bad time in the last few years won't seem silly.

Doctors are trained to deal with people who turn up needing a light bulb removed from their vagina! Now, that's silly. You're not silly.

harriet247 · 22/12/2013 21:45

Bigjessie you are so right! There are books available about cbt so you can try and help yourself with anxiety and scary thoughts. Ive always kept my 'checking'hidden because I come from a family of mental health workers! But mow the idea of my dd taking an hour to leave the house or go to bed etc is starting to worry me so thats why im trying to get on top of it. Dont get down on yourself, these things are born from love and not being able to channel worries the right way, it isnt embarrassing or silly x

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 21:55

Thanks for support everyone. Just had a chat with Dh and he agrees that my anxiety has escalated lately. I will make a gp appointment after Xmas

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harriet247 · 22/12/2013 22:13

Good for you - pm me if you ever fancy a chat about it x

tooworriedforwords · 22/12/2013 23:26

Thank you Harriet :)

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