To accept a job as PA to someone I have a dreadful schoolgirl crush on?

[MeantToStopAtTwo]

I've fallen for someone wholly inappropriate in an embarrassingly adolescent way, to the point where I find myself doing ridiculous things like saving his voice-mail messages to re-listen to and getting excited about using the same pen as him ('cos he's actually touched it too).

I am self-employed and he is an occasional client. I ended up chatting to him at an Xmas lunch today. He mentioned that he is thinking about getting a PA in 2014. I jokingly suggested that maybe it could be me. To my surprise he has seriously taken me up on this and sent me an email this afternoon pretty much saying the job is mine if I really want it!!

OMG it is tempting. Imagine getting the opportunity to spend all day with - and organising the life of - somebody you are that nuts about. Yet career-wise it would make no sense. I am much better off in every way working for myself and have worked hard to build up a good client base, which I would have to abandon. People would wonder what the hell I was doing. PAing isn't even related to what I do.

Don't take the job. But help him find a PA. Don't rush, either, you might need to really take your time.

I think this would be a very bad idea!

Absolutely do not do it!!!

Oh dear.
Perhaps try and focus on the rest of your life.
Job is a complete no go.
Are you single and is he? If so, does it have to be a crush?

That way madness lies.

Don't do it. No good will come of it. You have admitted yourself it makes no sense career wise. Please don't!

Neither of us is single, no. I am honestly not looking for it to be more than a crush. I could never do that to my family.

I've often thought that my ideal in this sort of situation is to be a fly-on-the-wall of the person's life. And what better opportunity to do that than this?!

Look, this is a bad idea in the same way as it would be a bad idea to persuade my husband and children we should move to Oslo and start a new life there, because of lives there.

Given neither of you are single, why tempt fate? Stay away from him!

Honestly, you're sounding like a bit of a tit, and I'm sure you aren't usually.
Have you thought about why you're having such an intense crush-what's lacking from the rest of your life?
Fantasies (which I have no problem with) are often a lot better than reality. Don't cross the line.

No way, as you're not single it's just asking for trouble. You may also find once you see more of him your 'crush' goes away and you don't like him at all. You're then stuck doing a job you don't want, with someone that may be a total PITA. I'd only take it if it was a serious career move I wanted to make, not for any personal reasons.

Erm I did this once, I was single, boss wasn't. It was emotionally horrendous; loved the job and colleagues but the whole situation became unbearable as it was reciprocated but neither of us would ever act on it. Better to move self away from the situation. It caused me so, so much pain - don't do it please!

Say thanks for the job offer but I'd rather have a shag but we can have dinner first if you insist

How on earth did you actually think that emphasizing yourself as a pa, as opposed to a person to do business with was a good idea?

What was this telling him about your business skills, and stability of your livelyhood? You were basically telling him you are giving up your career/business and look to arranging diaries, meeting and the wife/mistress's flowers???

Crazy idea. No.

Even if you were both single and it was a good career move for you, it would be risky.

Given that it's career limiting and you are both attached, it would be insane.

Let your crush burn out at a distance. Build your career in the direction that suits your skills.

Errr, No! doh!

Are you serious? What a ridiculous idea.

I think the OP would get over her crush ridiculously quickly once she had to work full time with this guy... Occasional clients are much less attractive when they're your only and full-time client. It would shatter a few illusions!

I'm with flatfaced. Working closely with this bloke would soon cure you of your crush.

Not sure why you've re-cast yourself as a PA from a business person with clients, though. No disrespect to PAs, but why?

i have been a PA the whole of my adult life, and once i was in this situation, its amazing how quickly you go off a person when you work so closely to them. you see every single side of their personality, you hear them on the phone to friends and family, you see them with colleagues, you read their emails, you will probably find out he isn't mr perfect, and that will be that.
BUT it sounds to me like taking the job isn't the best thing for you career-wise anyway.

Is it Charles Saatchi?

Thanks Quintessential. Way to belittle all the pa's out there.

FYI a lot of pa's are very intelligent, have degrees, are paid extremely high salaries and are basically the right hand of the person at the top. They run the show when the boss is away and a lot of places would be in real trouble in the absence of the pa.

We don't organise flowers for the mistress.

Isnt it the lovestruck OP who offers her pa services (without knowledge of the skill involved) on a plate to a business associate when she gets a little tipsy on a lunch,who is belittling all the PAs out there?

I am sure you like to think you "run the show". But OP has her own business, and in that context it looks odd and unprofessional to forward herself as a clients PA.