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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be raging about this

20 replies

scratchandsniff · 15/12/2013 17:37

So, I've been in bed poorly all day with D&V bug that's steadily got worse as day gone on.

DH has taken toddler out for afternoon. I phone and ask him to get me pepto bismol, at end of call he says he's going to pop to his parent's, this was about 2.30. Ok I say but food shop delivery coming between 5 and 6.

Fucking sods law the delivery man turns up whilst I'm sat on the loo with head in bucket. No sign of DH abd no way I'm in any state to get to door.

Manage to get out bathroom by which point delivery man gone. Phone him on mobile as have missed call on mine. Explain situation and he basically says tough shit I'm on my way elsewhere. Not his fault.

Phone DH and say where the hell are you? Explain delivery man been and gone. DH says you didn't say you needed me to come back! Argh, please tell me I'm not unreasonable to really pissed off with him. By the way his parents are only a few minutes away. He knew how rough I was feeling.

So, now we have sod all food in the house and god knows when the delivery will happen now.

OP posts:
MrsLouisTheroux · 15/12/2013 17:52

If the delivery was due between 5 and 6 was your DH back at 5?
Food delivery drivers usually wait until the time of delivery. In other words, if the slot is 5-6 and they turn up at 4.50, they wait until 5.
If he turned up early and didn't wait until 5 YANBU.

MrsLouisTheroux · 15/12/2013 17:54

Sorry, take it DH wasn't back. You should have agreed for him to come home for the delivery. :( Sorry you're ill.

Sirzy · 15/12/2013 18:07

He probably thought he was being helpful by keeping the toddler out of the way. It was just unlucky that you were unable to get to the door in time.

Hope you are feeling better soon

Tinks42 · 15/12/2013 18:12

Im also sorry you're ill but screaming at him for not knowing what to do etc. isn't the answer.

Ruffcat · 15/12/2013 18:13

I don't think j it was clear you needed him back, although it was a bit obvious.

LifeIsBetterInFlipFlops · 15/12/2013 18:26

He didn't think...they need it spelling out.
Hope you feel better soon.

PuppyMonkey · 15/12/2013 18:30

Yeah they need it spelling out - all your fault for not expecting a grown man to be able to understand a trifling thing like the shopping delivery time. Confused

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 15/12/2013 18:31

Oh fgs! Of course he should have been home. Did he expect you to tie a bucket round your arse while you dealt with delivery? What did he think you were reminding him about the delivery for?

And as for 'they' need things spelling out. Who is 'they'? Please dont say men. Please. How insulting.

HyvaPaiva · 15/12/2013 18:40

'they need it spelling out'

Who is they? If you mean men, I'm offended for my lovely, very capable (because he's a grown-up) DP and all others like him. I feel like I'm forever Hmm at women on here saying this sweepingly general crap to excuse unreliable men.

Sorry, OP, your DH should have been home on time.

LifeIsBetterInFlipFlops · 15/12/2013 18:43

Ok apologies for the s

LifeIsBetterInFlipFlops · 15/12/2013 18:44

Sorry for the sweeping generalisation - OP's DH needs it spelling out though.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 15/12/2013 18:48

No he doesnt. Why would he? Confused He needs to think "why is she telling me about the delivery between 5 and 6? It must be relevant to me. Why could that be? Hmmm, i must have to be there for it." That is if he genuinely is slow on the uptake and doesnt automatically know that his sick partner shoulnt be expected to deal with it.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 15/12/2013 18:49

However OP, dont rage about it. Leave it for him to rearrange and you get to bed and let your body recover.

HandragsNGladbags · 15/12/2013 18:55

YANBU

If I told ill DH I was going out and he said that's great but food delivery coming at 5 I wouldn't need him to add - so you need to be back as I have a bug

You shouldn't need to add that.

Me and DH have these convo's occasionally. "Well you didn't TELL me to empty the dishwasher". He gets a rude reply concerning eyes and using them.

Hassled · 15/12/2013 18:55

YANBU but it's his problem now, not yours. Hope you feel better soon.

tumbletumble · 15/12/2013 18:59

Sorry, I don't think you made it clear. He obviously thought that even though you were ill, you'd be ok just to open the door for the delivery man. I'm not saying this just because he's a man btw.

He probably thought he was being helpful keeping your toddler out of the house as long as possible.

onepieceoflollipop · 15/12/2013 19:01

YANBU. In fact if you had also asked for him to bring medicine he should have popped back with that earlier. Get well soon.

Gileswithachainsaw · 15/12/2013 19:08

Yanbu.

How stupid is this man that he couldn't figure out to be back in time.

If you can't get out if bed you can't deal with the shopping. Bloody obvious ffs :(

PorkPieandPickle · 15/12/2013 19:39

I think it should have been totally obvious to him you needed him back- he shouldn't need it 'spelling out', he's and adult!! it would be obvious to me from your exchange that he was expected to be back for 5.

also, my DH would not want me handling the household food when I had d&v?! He would make sure he was back!!!

DoJo · 15/12/2013 19:41

YANBU - how did he expect you to deal with the delivery when you were unable to stop throwing up? Even if you had had a lull enough to open the door, no doubt your shopping involved chilled and frozen food which needs to be put away on arrival and someone with a stomach bug shouldn't be handling food if it can be avoided anyway. I hope he is suitably sorry and sorts it all out while you take yourself back to bed.

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