AIBU to not want to sign this birthday card?

[Callani]

It's my boss's birthday coming up, and one of my female colleagues bought him a birthday card for everyone to sign.

The thing is, the card is really rude, references blow jobs and I really don't want to sign it (plus I think the card's massively inappropriate for a male boss of a full female team)

Do I just keep schtum and sign, or do I get another card? I genuinely don't know what I'd write in a card like that!

I too would say I'd already got a card,then say that if anyone wants to sign your card,they're quite welcome.

I think people will gossip/wonder why she is giving a separate card. If she explains why, they will think she sees herself as above them. I don't agree with these conclusions but in a workplace, it is what I imagine others would think.

I would not be signing it, and also dobbing them in to personnel anonymously, if it was a big enough company that there was some sort of HR. Totally inappropriate for a workplace!

well, if I was OP's colleague I wouldn't be thinking 'stuck up bitch' I'd be thinking 'thank God she has come up with a solution to this hideously embarassing situation bad-taste colleague has put me in'
....and judging by this thread I wouldn't be alone.

Pretend to sign it, but actually draw a massive cock.

Hey presto! Problem solved.

Sounds like a crude jokey card but by not signing it you will stand out like a sore thumb.

Oh dear, yuk. YANBU. Get another as suggested. He will prob feel embarrassed getting that card from his employees.

just say "are you fucking kidding me, thats grim and im not signing that, I dont care what you say"

and dont sign it. Dont be meek about it, or theyll gossip. Say its gross and they can sign what they want, but youre not

As with the Merry fucking Christmas thread , aside from anything else it's not funny.

And hugely inappropriate for a work environment.

yanbu can you imagine a man buying similar for a female boss?

I might sign it as 'well one things for sure, your birthday will be better than this card, have a good day' and leave it at that.

Yuck, I wouldn't sign that

It will look odd if you buy your own card and give it separately. Really odd.

You shouldn't sign theirs if you find it inappropriate or offensive. If pressed, you could just say you'd prefer not to thanks. He's hardly going to be counting signatures is he? So if you just don't sign it, it will go unnoticed or under the radar. If you give your own card, you will look a bit sanctimonious because you would really be making an issue of it, rather than just quietly not signing.

Grown men do not really care for birthday cards IME. They'll laugh at a joint one in the office but that's as far as it goes. There is really no need for you to send a card and you will look silly if you do.

No, I wouldn't sign it... and I have a filthy sense of humour.

I can imagine my own male, mid-late 30s boss would be pretty unimpressed if he received that from our largely female staff.

Gawh! If my husband got that card fri ngus enokitees, I would be like and

"fri ngus enokitees" should naturally be "from his employees"

Dont know why I suddenly started typing in Klingon.

Quintessential your -Klingon is considerably funnier than the card.

Lol!

If that card had been sent by a group of men in an office, surely it'd have been regarded as unacceptable misogyny? I wouldn't sign it - it's uncomfortable.

Thanks for your input everyone - thankfully this morning I got into the office and someone else has bought a more "work appropriate card" as she put it, so it seems that the question is null and void now

He may think you bought it.
Beware and don't sign.

Oh, just read your update, good outcome, but wtf about the other card? Bizarre.

That's good

Looks like you weren't alone in your sentiments then.

Good! Always reassuring when you aren't the only one to think wtf.

Good on new card development. Of course you weren't being unreasonable, OP. I'm just gobsmacked at the number of people on the thread who would prefer to put their names to a completely professionally inappropriate, misogynistic piece of crap rather than 'look odd' by standing out from the crowd. That's pretty depressing.