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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be angry that the school bus driver dropped my 5yo DD 3/4 mile away from school?

76 replies

Bigbootbingo · 11/12/2013 21:22

There was a traffic jam caused by an RTA and he gave the girls on the bus the option to get off and walk the remaining 3/4 mile to school or remain on the bus until he could get through. Many of the girl's chose to walk and my 5 year old decided to go with them. Many of the girls are in the seniors and apparently one held DD's hand all the way. I just feel sick to my stomach, what if none of the girls took my DD under their wing? Should I just be relieved they did and get on with it or should I report the driver. (The bus is on a school contract.)

OP posts:

formerbabe · 11/12/2013 21:52

Oh my gosh...I get a cold chill going through me at the thought of it...terrifying, unacceptable and completely shocking. 3/4 mile is a bloody long way as well...
Those girls who helped him sound like diamonds

dementedma · 11/12/2013 21:54

Well done to senior girls for minding the wee one

waltermittymissus · 11/12/2013 21:56

Fucking hell I would go all kinds of crazy.

How dare he?

I would feel sick thinking about what could have happened.

Those seniors did a great job looking after her.

ConferencePear · 11/12/2013 21:58

Please be sure to make sure that the head of the secondary school knows and gives credit to the girl who held her hand. In my experience it can sometimes be a girl who isn't necessarily the apple of the school's eye that does this sort of thing and it might give her a great boost.
Report the driver of course.

pixiepotter · 11/12/2013 22:01

I am guessing he probably made sure she had an older one to look after her.Niot that that makes it ok but it would be some mitigation

ZombiePenguin · 11/12/2013 22:04

YADNBU.

He probably made sure someone was responsible.

But he couldn't know, he couldn't watch them or make sure that whatever they said, they'd be responsible, and he shouldn't trust them with a little child, however lovely the girls were.

Report.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 11/12/2013 22:06

Definitely report. I would have freaked out if it was dd1 (who is 5) and she would have been scared too. Not good enough.

Lilacroses · 11/12/2013 22:07

That is awful! Dropping a 5 year old that far from school?! I would be amazed if the driver wasn't disciplined.

pinkdelight · 11/12/2013 22:08

I got hit by a car in a similar situation when I was nine. School coach made impromptu stop to drop us off. I crossed the road. Didn't walk again for six months. Bloody lucky I survived. It was years ago so no one thought of suing. These days if it was my kid I'd go batshit. It must break every rule in their book. What the hell was he thinking? Thank god those other kids took good care of her.

TalkativeJim · 11/12/2013 22:08

Your DH thinks you might be overreacting... Maybe ask him how he thinks he'd be reacting now if those girls had raced off chatting and laughing, not noticed your DD and at 3.15 pm you'd been faced with the sentence 'we don't know...the last time she was definitely seen was this morning, getting off the bus alone on x road...we don't know which way she went, only that she didn't manage to find the way to school...'

Original poster

Bigbootbingo · 11/12/2013 22:11

My thoughts indeed Jim. I am so grateful to the older girls who took care of her, I certainly will be making that known to school. They are a credit to the school and their parents.

OP posts:

ReallyTired · 11/12/2013 22:11

I think its lovely that the older girls looked after the five year old. However there is no way the driver should have allowed the five year old off the bus. I have no idea how old the senior girl was, but most state schools insist that a five year old is picked up by someone over 16.

Sometimes five year olds can be naughty and potentially the driver was putting an older child in a situation that they would not be able to cope with.

TheJollyReindeer · 11/12/2013 22:11

Huge complaint. I feel sick just thinking about that.

LEMisafucker · 11/12/2013 22:12

Is this a public bus?

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 11/12/2013 22:13

Oh god - that has chilled me to the bone. My little girl is 5 - I just can't imagine it. Yadnbu.

LEMisafucker · 11/12/2013 22:13

Ah missed last line of thread. Yanbu report

Quoteunquote · 11/12/2013 22:15

Worrying that the driver thought it more important that they get to school on time rather than safely,

Make sure that the county council, change that policy clearly.

How old were the girls that took her?

NoComet · 11/12/2013 22:26

YANBU to report this.

I wouldn't worry because we only have one primary bus and the DCs all know each other and the older ones would take perfect care of the little ones.

However, I'm assuming your in a town, city, not a small village.

DH has written a stinking Email about our senior school bus dumping DCs back at school (because some children were being very silly) no one came out to check they all had a way home. There is no public transport had I been out it's a five mile walk with no pavements along dangerous roads.

Also this was the second time something like this had happened, the first DD got off 2.5 miles from home to walk rather than go back to school (she says she insisted and not to complain that time).

No the children should be stupid and no it isn't the drivers fault the bus takes an hour to do a 20minute trip and the DC get fed up, but he shouldn't dump 12y girls in random places.

LindyHemming · 11/12/2013 23:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Idespair · 11/12/2013 23:10

You absolutely must speak to the head about it urgently. Otherwise, the school could think you were responsible for your dd arriving at school in this manner.

I am astonished the driver allowed your dd off the bus.

Twoandtwomakeschaos · 11/12/2013 23:18

I am not sure, but it might have been differently bad had the little girl been left on the bus on her own. Not sure how that can be guarded against.

steppemum · 12/12/2013 09:15

maybe twoandtwo, but I did wonder if she was the only primary aged child on the bus? Surely there were others?

marmaladeandguitars · 12/12/2013 09:54

Absolutely report this. My DD also gets the school bus (rural area) and there is absolutely no way this would be allowed to happen. On a few occasions where no parent has been there to pick up the child from the bus, the bus driver has waited 10 or 15 minutes, then turned around and taken the child straight back to school, where they can wait in safety until the parent/carer has been contacted.

The school bus route is absolutely set in stone- the bus driver can be disciplined if he deviates even a little from the set route- for instance, driving into a cul de sac instead of waiting at the end.

Utterly shocking behaviour from the bus driver. Thank goodness for those lovely older girls- what absolute gems, bless them.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 12/12/2013 11:12

Another one saying report the driver and commend the senior girls who looked after your dd. And a big, fat reality check for your dh. Yes, nothing bad happened - but so much could have gone wrong. Ask him if he'd be happy for her to be wandering round the town on her own?

Original poster

Bigbootbingo · 13/12/2013 00:03

Evening. My daughter is the youngest on the bus. There are four of them in primary altogether on the bus. I have reported it. The school shared my concerns and are acting on it and are also passing on our heartfelt thanks to the older girls. My DD can't see any issues at all, she has told me she is not a baby and it was a big adventure. I wish I was 5 again and could live in such happy ignorance :) Thanks for your thoughts everyone.

OP posts:

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