to dread dh going back to work

[imissredwine]

Leaving me with a newborn and a 3 1/2 year old. Dh had his 2 weeks paternity leave and bow has to go back having had his request for special leave and parental leave refused. He doesn't want to go back either he works nights so weekends are goingito be full on. We're doing ok but no2 is breast fed and can have marathon feeds while no1 has become somewhat boisterous and naughty. Realise this is normal but I could bloody strangle her!

Any one have top tips on how to amuse a 3 year old while trapped on the sofa bf-ing? Or generally about gow to get through this bit?
Or just take a big shot of man the fuck up?

Read to her?

Get a sling and lean how to feed no2 in it.

Play music

Watch TV

I don't have two, but I'm sure I read on here about a special bag of books / toys that was only to be used when nrw baby was feeding.

Is dd in nursery? At least for her free 15 hours?

YANBU - my DH is back today after 2 weeks and I'm not looking forward to it although we only have 1 child so don't have your dilemma.

I had an EMCS and still sore plus I have anaemia so feel extra tired

DH has been great while home which makes it worse.

Sure we'll be ok but I'll miss him x

I had DC2 when DC1 was 2.5 years old.

It was easier than I thought, as I was more confident about breastfeeding. First time round I had no idea.

DS was plonked in front of CBeebies more than I perhaps would have liked while I got learning about sleep, feeding, looking after DD, but I had to let some of my standards slip a bit.

Slings are helpful, although I NEVER managed to breastfeed in any of the 3 types I had I used them for when DD was clingy and I had to get lunch ready or do bit of housework.

It's great OP that your DD is 3.5 years. She will love helping you fetch nappies, bring you things and her seeing you care for her sibling will be a great lesson for her :)

It's hard at the beginning - I remember finding it so hard to get them both dressed and out in the car on time - but it's so worth it!

I used to get a drink, a snack for me and my toddler and we'd read.

Sometimes we'd be reading for an hour.

I used to make sure there were toys around as well, in case.

Cbeebies and DVDs and don't beat yourself up about it! When your baby will settle try to do something focused with your older DC. Playdough, baking, painting and then at least they've had some attention and have done something they like. Also try and get out so the older one can run off some energy every day and it will make you feel better too.

I presume your older DC is doing the 15 hours at pre school? At least you're on countdown til sept when it will get a lot easier! It's so hard handling the older ones bad behaviour when you're tired and sat breastfeeding. It sounds like you're doing a good job OP and this too shall pass.

No1 doing 2 days at nursery which she loves.
I have a sling, can I put a 3 wo in it? Would help enormously. Suddenly it's all got a bit tricky as we both thought we'd have a lot more time as a 4 before work beckoned. 2 weeks paternity leave ffs!
I suppose my beautiful routine will return but for now will just be a much missed memory!
Thanks all

Imissredwine- you can put a newborn in a stretchy sling, if that's what you have. If it's a buckle carrier then you need to read the instructions- some require a separate insert for newborns.

You can get stretchies for about £20 on eBay if the sling you have isn't suitable for a newborn.

Cbeebies is your friend. It saved me when I was in that situation.