AIBU to be worried about my mother's idea on food safety? Or am I acting the wanker?

[Wombmates]

I decided to 'host' Christmas at my house this year as my brother is with his wife's family and it's not fair for mum and dad to always cook... However, mum has said she will buy the lion's share of the food (very sweet offer).
We are not exactly traditionalists and every year, we have the same thing - chicken breast ''rolled and stuffed' - if I had to guess I would say it was about 5-7lbs of meat, which we eat for the roast and then have as leftovers.
Mum has already bought this joint of meat and frozen it, so I said to her, I shall collect it on the 23rd so that I can defrost it in my fridge in time for the morning of the 25th. Mum says to me ''No bother, I shall defrost it on the worktop on the 24th and you can collect it on Christmas Eve night''. I said, "oh, I don't think it should be defrosted on the worktop - isn't that unsafe?" Mum breezily assures me that is the way she does it every year ''a day on the worktop and it's fine''. To be fair, we have never been sick from it (what we don't know...)

In 2007 I got seriously ill from chicken from a pub which was later found to have been kept in cold water in the filthy sink instead of the fridge (ok I was nicely compensated but the almost three weeks in hospital weren't great). Since then, I've probably been a bit ''over the top'' with food safety.

Since she said about leaving it on the worktop for ''a day'' I've been freaking out.

Sorry if this seems pathetic - but it's causing me no end of worry. Any advice? Do you think I should just tell her the 24th is no good for me and collect it -frozen- on the 23rd and just defrost it myself in the fridge? Again, I realise this may sound trite when there are so many other things to worry about, but any advice would be great. Thanks

we always defrost stuff on the worktop and then put it in the fridge afterwards.

Even the nhs website mentions defrosting out of a fridge

www.nhs.uk/livewell/healthychristmas/pages/healthy-christmas-tips.aspx

I defrost food on the worktop sometimes, it's fine!

Seriously, it's not worthj freaking out over. presumably your mum has always done this and so far, you've survived. When people defrost massive turkeys do you really think they defrost them in the fridge - I bet they wouldn't be able to fit them in there :)

It would probably be fine but it worries you and after being so ill with food poisoning it's understandable you're cautious.

I'd just happen to be passing by on the 23rd and pick it up while you're there. If she says anything just explain that you're not doubting her you're just very anxious about raw chicken since you got sick from it.

I always defrost on work top. Overnight then put in fridge following day

I defrost all meat and fish out of the fridge.

I nearly walkways defrost at room temperature, no problems here either

*always lol

Oh, I always defrost out of the fridge! Unless I'm doing it overnight then I might put it inside the microwave to hide it from the cat

This is how I defrost all items. Always have done. Never any illness here.

I will be doing this with one of our turkeys.

It would probably be fine, I defrost things on the Worktop all the time.

However , given what happened to you with such bad food poisoning, I think I would probably be more cautious. If it makes you feel better then get it from your mum on 23 rd.

Our fridge is so damn cold that I cant really defrost in it! Arent there risks of stuff taking that long to defrost?

I always defrost on worktop, although in an unheated room. As long as it doesn't hang around after it's thawed, it'll be fine. Cooking will kill any bugs.

I've tried thawing things in the fridge but they never thaw!

I always leave things on the worktop to thaw out, then straight in the fridge when it's done (or oven if cooking straight away).

I always defrost on the work top during the winter. Defrost in fridge during the summer. Our kitchen is freezing in the winter and boiling in the summer. We've never had food poisoning or anything.

Defrosting on the worktop is fine.

Super apologetic and excessively grateful is the way to go.

As in: I'm so sorry, I know I'm being weird about it but would you humour me on this one thing as I was traumatised by the pub food chicken thing? I know I'm being unreasonable and thank you so much for understanding. Sorry sorry and thank you.

I always defrost on the worktop. Especially this time of year.

I have had food poisoning in the past and the one thing I do hate is how my in-laws put the turkey on a worktop beside a radiator after Christmas lunch and leave it there until the evening. Nicely brewing up lots of germs. I always remove it to somewhere cool.

I defrost worktop as well. Aside from chickens.. They defrost in the microwave in half an hour.

Another one that defrosts on work top all the time.

Forgot to say, defrost on worktops is in fact fine but I totally understand why it's not fine for you personally.

I understand why you're concerned given your experience! However, I think the posters above are correct that it is fine provided it is not left and left and gets warm. I think the key is something to do with not allowing the food to spend time at a too-warm internal temperature (I can't remember what that is), at which bugs can breed. I often, for example, take chicken or fish out of the freezer at breakfast time, defrost it (in its packaging) sitting on the draining board and then put it in the fridge ready to cook with. I keep checking to make sure it is still cold and do not let it get slightly warm.

If you're really worried though I'd find an excuse to pick it up from her earlier and defrost it in the fridge as you want to - it won't hurt and she might understand why you are so concerned?

I always defrost out of the fridge, so does my mother, so did my grandma and none of us have ever contracted food poisoning or even a slightly dicky tummy from things cooked and prepared by us.

After my Mum has picked the (fresh) turkey up from her butcher, it stays overnight in the garage before being stuffed on Christmas Eve and then it goes in the fridge until we put it in the oven before we go to bed.

I wouldn't be so harsh as to say that you are acting the wanker, but you are worrying needlessly :)

To be fair, the chicken you ate probably wasn't cooked properly. I think the statistics are that around half of all chickens carry the salmonella bug which is why it's so vital to cook it properly.

Defrosting at room temperature is absolutely fine. All you need to make sure is that the chicken is cooked all the way through.

I also defrost on the worktop. But if you're happier defrosting for longer in the fridge that's fine too. Neither of you is being unreasonable or unhygienic. You might need to take the chicken out of the fridge on Xmas morning to make sure it is fully defrosted before you cook it.

Thanks everyone, I thought I would get annihilated for this post - you've all been very reassuring. The fact that she's ''always done this'' makes me laugh - I have never been sick from anything she ate - I guess it's just because I know that's what she's done it's making me panic. :) I s'pose I should be worrying about the bigger stuff now like how to buy presents for 8 people when I only have £150 available :) Hope you all have a lovely bacteria-free Christmas !!