To be livid :(

[cls77]

DD's Granny (Ex's side) was absolutely vile to DD last night. DD text to ask when she could see her again, as its been weeks,and was told If DD isnt seeing her DF at the moment, then she didnt want to see her. DD and DF are currently not really communicating (DD is 11) as he has hurt her so much this last year, since he left, that she doesnt want to talk or see him at the moment. She has said that she needs some time. He only used to see her for 3 hrs once a month and then its to take her to his new GF and her two DC's home He then leaves DD with GF's kids and goes upstairs with GF leaving DD to play? The other DC are 7 and 9, so DD is an ideal babysitter me thinks angry
I am constantly telling DD to make contact with DF family and him, and that they can work through things, but DD doesnt want to and I have to respect that, I honestly didnt think Granny would treat DD like this though? Its broken her heart sad What do I say to DD?
Any advice on how to ignore the "Your mother is poisoning you to not see your father" comments too would be greatly received.

She's using emotional blackmail on your dd and that's not on , I'd be livid too but I guess you could try contacting her granny and explaining how your dd feels , if this woman is still vile then let her get on with it

That's shocking, a grown woman would emotionally black-mail her own granddaughter like that. I'd be seriously inclined to be spitting some serious vitriol in her direction, but then that's not really in your girls best interest.

Perhaps just phone her and say 'If you want to be like that, then fine. You won't be seeing her. Your choice, not hers. Which is a shame really, and on the more pathetic side of childish.'

With regards to the poisoning thing? Please don't worry too much about that. Assuming your daughter is intelligent, she'll see through the stupid mind games and realise who the real poison is in time. People like this always get bitten in the arse- they let the fascade slip eventually because it is fucking exhausting being evil.

I can see why she doesn't want to see her father.

Give your dd a massive hug. Her granny is a twat.

I would suggest that maybe you should take a deep breath and contact the grandmother yourself. Explain why your dd isn't seeing her father at the moment and point out that for her to get a relationship back with him in the future would be a damn sight easier if she was having contact with other family members.

Tell her you are livid that a grown woman would emotionally blackmail an eleven year old child but that you are willing to accept it won't happen again and let it pass but that your dd really wants a relationship with her grandmother.