who is BU? patient, hospital, local authority, family, welfare retrenchment or no one?

[TheXxed]

I am not sure what to make of this, I am not sure who's problem it is, I am not sure what the solution is but I do feel that the hospital is not the best place to deal with this.

here is the link

The son. He can spend the 40k on making his house suitable.

You don't pay taxes to pay for your long term care though. We could do that, but we'd all have to pay a fuck load extra tax.

This lady has savings. That's what is meant to pay for your long term care. But people don't like this as it means no inheritance.

Why should you and I pay for someone else's nursing home if they have the money to fund it themselves, just so their family can have a nice inheritance?

God I hate that " I've paid taxes " arguement! Yes you have, and they were spent a long time ago. They're not being kept in a box somewhere with your name on them. The taxes you've paid aren't enough to pay for your long term care, unless you're a millionaire who's aid hundreds of thousands in tax (and if you are then you'll probably have enough of your own money to pay)

I understand kundry it does seem as though the son is going to a lot of effort to protect his inheritance .

She also made a comment about buying a sleeping bag and sleeping outside the hospital which makes me think she feels quite helpless and needs round the clock care something the local authority or her family cannot provide.

Yep, most of us won't pay enough tax to cover our lifetime state expenditure - we are relying on the top 5% of tax payers to bail us out. No-one likes to think this though.

We're like the out of touch politician who doesn't know how much a loaf of bread costs. Well we don't know how much the NHS, long term care, road maintenance and a host of other things cost but we all believe we should have it, it should be perfect at all times, we should be able to complain ferociously about it and we shouldn't need to pay a penny or lift a finger.

quite helpless and needs round the clock care something the local authority or her family cannot provide.

The DM article says she is keen to keep her independance which is why she is refusing care homes which she has been offered as she is only interested in sheltered accomodation

The 'paying taxes' thing is such nonsense. What if she was a SAHM her whole life, which was pretty common for her generation? No taxes at all. Long-term care costs a fortune. I bet SS have been tearing their hair out trying to find her something suitable, spending workers' time on this rather than on other older people who might be in very bad situations.

Suspect she is unrealistic then about her needs. We often have people wanting to go into a nice sheltered flat who are very upset when we tell them this won't work and they need a nursing home.

Of course there is nothing stopping her going to a care home temporarily while she waits (or pays for) her dream home, seeing as she doesn't need to be in hospital.

Alternatively if she is independent enough to manage in a sheltered flat, £40,000 would easily cover the adaptations needed to her son's home.

I work in a hospital and the longer fit people stay there, the more chance they have of picking up a bug......it is full of sick people after all. Nothing is more upsetting than watching an elderly person, who is well but still there because of waiting for housing, get a hospital acquired pneumomia.

The argument of paying taxes your whole life meaning you don't need to pay for care is very simplistic. You don't have to pay for nursing care - if you need that then the social services pay the part of your costs which relate to nursing - but why does paying taxes your whole life mean that someone else should pay for your accommodation, meals, heating etc as well? It doesn't.

If I was ill, I wouldn't expect the social services to pay for someone to hoover the house, do the shopping, make my beds and pay my mortgage. That is my responsibility so long as I the funds to pay for it. If I don't then I would hope the social services would find somewhere to house me but fully expect that to be somewhere of their convenience, not mine.

This country doesn't have the money to keep people just so that they don't have to spend their own money. That's why you save up - for your old age. If you don't have it then of course you should still have the basics - somewhere to live, food and heating etc. But we can only afford to pay for those who can't, if those who can, do.

The family are.

My Nan went into hospital from sheltered accommodation, but couldn't go back because she couldn't look after herself. My mum wanted her to go into a particular care home but knew it was unfair my nan and the hospital to keep her in there until a place came available. As soon as my mum found a care home that was nice, clean and offered good care my nan moved. It took about 2 weeks. (I know that is super quick)

We all want the 'ideal world' scearnio I think, but it is not always there and you can not wait indefinitely.

I wonder how many people have been turned away while she has been blocking that bed?

I am surprised that the hospital have her in a neuro bed. Most hospitals now have a rehab ward for the elderly who have been admitted but have recovered medically. They are normally moved to the rehab to help them regain their independence, then Social Services find a place in a local residential care home to carry on the rehab, temporarily till they can return to independent living in the relevant environment.... This is what happened to my Mother so I speak from experience.

The son has stated that the OH had deemed his property unsuitable for her needs, so please do not place blame at his door, he also stated he made hundreds of phone calls and sent god knows how many emails over the last 7 months to try and sort the situation out. And again from personal experience I can fully empathise with him there, been there, bought the tee-shirt etc. There are massive gaps in communication within the relevant agencies that they are having to deal with it is a nightmare.

Yes she has been offered 3 properties by the council and not taken them, were they near her family and friends? a bedsit????? common this woman has worked in the field that she is now needing the use of. Her only other option would be to buy a leasehold on a privately run sheltered housing appartment, whether £40,000 would cover it I don't know, this is what we have done for my Mother, sold her house and buying one but it cost more than that.

So please have open minds on this situation regarding the family and the patient.... it is the system that she is stuck in that is at fault.

I wonder why the family can't organise a care package for her so she can still go into accommodation. You can't just keep refusing what's on offer.

I've had families who have refused to the their children home because they want a bigger house.

*take their

She and her family are being unreasonable.

£40K pays for quite a few months in a care home, or if she is fit enough for a sheltered place it would pay for her to live in a hotel until somewhere was ready.

On a side issue I would be appalled if an elderly relative of mine was in a national newspaper in a hospital nightie. Can't the son even do a bit of washing?

How ironic that six months ago they were in the national press moaning she wasn't been given enough help with eating and now they're moaning saying shes well enough to be in sheltered housing not a care home.

If that's true then why in the DM link is the granddaughter having to hold a cup to help her drink? Either she's well enough to manage it herself and the photo is exaggerated for effect or she should be in a care home.

I suppose maybe she's improved over the last few months to be able to eat without help but the cup holding thing stands.

Yes Viva, she can't eat a sandwich because of previous throat cancer but she can manage that big bit of cake! Something doesn't add up.

I am not sure why the son keeps going to the press, what does he gain from this?

Does the bloke have the press on speed dial?

And reading the first link. Surely if it was that bad he wouldn't want to leave his elderly gran in hospital

So my answer is the family.