to think this is a bit shit actually?

[AliBean]

So DS1 was sick this morning and couldn't go to preschool so I text DS2's childminder (after trying to phone but no answer) to say I was keeping him home as I couldn't get DS2 to her (20 minute drive away) without loading puking DS1 into the car too...the response is ah sorry for you...I will have to charge as it's in the contract. Only don't charge if DS2 is ill or if I (cm) is ill.
Fair enough but two weeks ago she could have DS2 as her DD was ill. Obviously its a pain if I can't get him to her just as its a pain if she cant have him if one of her own DC's is ill...but I didn't expect a free session to make up for my inconvenience so am I being unreasonable to expect to not be charged for today?

Yabu. My childminders charge whether the child is there or not. Mine even charges for bank holidays even though she doesn't work them. Now that really pisses me off.

She couldn't work when her child was ill, which is exactly what happened to you. And practically ever parent I've ever met. Even those with family/friends to help out have days where nobody is able to help. She's very good not to charge you when your other DC is poorly.

What a cow putting her own child before yours.

Op, you signed a contract which is far fairer than any I offer. In my setting if you miss a session you have booked you pay.

If I have to cancel then you don't and I'll contact my childminder friends to see if any of them can help but I certainly wouldn't be sending my child offto grandparents (or wherever) so o could look after someone else's child.

Of course YABU.

What a bizarre theory.

Your ability to access her is not her concern. Again I hugely inconvenience my work if I am unable to come in to work due to either my own or my dc illness. My work could technically not pay me for parental leave. However, on some days we are quiet, things have been cancelled and I am merely spodding about. But I am available to work and am therefore paid. Because I have a contract.

Your cm has a pretty standard contract (apart from actually being very generous with regards to mindees illnesses). You pay her if she is available to work. If she is unavailable, you don't. It really is that simple (and fair).

daylight hours are gold to all of us op......al of us.....you think you are a special case

Well it seems on this occasion I am in fact being unreasonable. I have no intention whatsoever not to pay, I do know I am very lucky to have a l I vely CM who adores my son and I realise I have been quite niave about the CM/Parent relationship. So thanks to you all for your responses. Wine time...

My childminder charges if DS is ill & if I'm ill and if she is ill.i agree its annoying but I think it's fairly standard in afraid x

I just re-read the whole thread...its quite amazing how vitriolic some posters are...
it also appears that the majority of you see me as someone who can afford alternatives and that my childminder is less well off than I am due to the very nature of our relationship... how stereotypical. I am totally broke...I am building a business from scratch and have zero disposable income. I pay for my CM with tax credits and somehow manage to make up the difference. I work every hour I can. I sleep 4 hrs a night if I am lucky...my CM does childminding because she likes it...loves children...her youngest is off to preschool and its easy money...she has 2 brand new cars, no money worries whatsoever and has just had a new kitchen, bathroom and landscaped garden. I wonder if that alters anyone's opinion? I guess that this info could be construed as drip feeding but I personally don't think our differing financial situations are relevant; I am merely responding to the overwhelming mood that I am taking the piss out of my "poor" childminder.

The financial situations aren't relevant - she's offering a service, you are using her services. If she's available for work she should be paid.

Did she charge you for the day she closed due to her child's illness?

I think you are missing the point which is that you should not have been charged when she couldn't have your kid...and you should follow that up to make up for today.

It doesn't alter my opinion. I thought YWBU because it is unreasonable to expect someone not to stick to a fair contract that you signed, and because you seem to think you shouldn't have to pay even though it's your reasons that are making her unable to work.

If anything, the fact that you are starting a business should give you more empathy with her position.

But you have realised it was unreasonable

you have a CONTRACT - you pay

you chose not to take him

My CM doesn't charge if SHE is ill - everything else we pay for - and holidays - half pay oh and it's after school care so I pay half all through the school holidays as well - and then have to pay for holiday clubs on top of that

My CM runs a business and I signed a contact understanding the above

YABU

No I got that FunkyBoldRibena. I need to bring that one up with her and just thrash out that point. I feel the premise is the same...contractually (however nice/kind/unusual it may be) if either she or my DS is unwell then no charge. if her immediate family are unwell she cant work. If my immediate family are unwell I can't get him there. There isn't an alternative for either of us. Its swings and roundabouts.

having just read your last post it occurs to me that what you could have done is say that it was your minded child that was in fact ill, then you wouldn't have had to pay her. (am not saying you should, just that you could) I am astounded that you don't have to pay if your child is sick actually and would not at all say that the contract is one-sided. As for it being "easy money", you are clearly bonkers! My CM has my two and others for ten hours a day. She gets no official lunch break when she can be off duty and juggles various school runs and the needs of her own family with being the most fabulous, hands on, arty crafty, inventive, loving and nurturing presence regardless of is her LO has been up in the night or whatever. She only doesn't work if she or her kid(s) have something contagious and as another poster says, can lose hundreds of pounds in a few days if she can't work, as most self employed people do. I could never in a million years do what she does (but I do teach in a secondary school which really is a doddle in my opinion, compared to what she does. Honest question (not goading) but why don't you have a go at it if all you can see are the advantages?

so for those of you who are hung up on the contract...there should be a caveat in the contract about any other situations that may arise where the arrangement becomes untenable. Some clarification on who pays for what when. I think if this situation had arisen the other way around...ie. me first with my sick DC then the issue would never have entered my mind.

FairyLights I love how you honed in on one comment...its easy in the sense that she was already trained & in possession of relevant qualifications, home safe and suitable, no particular financial need to do it so she has just my DS twice a week for approx 4 hours. So yeah...given the choice I would swop in a heartbeat.

yep..should have lied then... Stupid me.

Childminding is 'easymoney'

Why don't you try it then?

Why couldn't your DH ( if you have one) either stay home with the sick child or drop off the other one?

Any job is easy money if you love it and do it because you want to rather than because you have to. My DP was already at work. DS1 got sick at 6:30 am. Gratifyingly DS2 has been throwing up for the past hour so at least I was right not sending him with something contagious I also could have lied...I didn't...
I like and respect my CM. She does a fab job for the hours she has my DS. Please don't take my comments out of context.

Not sure what you wanted from your CM tbh?

I work on the principle that, if I am available to work the contracted hours, the parents pay for the service and, if I'm not available, I do not charge.

It has always been seen as fair and reasonable by parents and everyone always knew where they stood.

I certainly wouldn't agree not to charge for a child who was ill because I would still be available to work.

If I am unable to work through my own illness, my children being ill or for any other reason, the parents have to pay a different childcarer so it would not be appropriate for me to charge them.

To expect your childminder to make no charge, both when she is unable to work and when your DS is ill, seems unreasonable as she takes the hit both times.

Unless she charged you when she couldn't work due to her own child's illness (which isn't clear from your posts), it is not reasonable to expect her to lose out financially due to your child's illness.

When ds was at nursery if he was booked in for Mondays and there was a bank holiday we still had to pay, even though the nursery was closed - same thing for all other bank holidays / Xmas days etc.

If ds was sick, we paid. If ds went on holiday with us for a week we still paid.

It's shit but they still have staff to pay, they can't tell the staff not to come in because a couple of kids are sick so they won't get paid.

Unfortunately it's how childcare works.

It still isn't clear if you had to pay when the CM was ill. If that was the case, I understand why you feel as you do. In every circumstance I have come across in RL, you pay if you are unable to make a booked session, but not if the CM cannot make one.