...to stop my dd from facetiming.messaging this boy?

[plum100]

Hi I would value your advice,
DD is 9 and facetimes her friends after school.

We were out yesterday and she saw a boy from the year above - who is her friends 'boyfriend' . when she came home she told her friend via facetime and then her friend added then in to a group chat so they could all talk together.

Last night I went into her room to discover she was facetiming this lad.

Any way - I have checked the ipod this morning and the messages on there go something like this

him - don't you love me

her - why are you saying that ? you love xxxx?

him - no I don't .

That was about as bad as it got.

But wibu to say no more contact with this boy? For starters she is 9 FFS!!! I do not want this sort of chat already.

Secondly - he is meant to be 'going out' with dd friend -- how ridiculous does that sound!!! I can see potential fallouts etc between the girls and I don't want that.

Or am I being totally over the top. should I be thinking They are only 9 - what harm can it do?

My feeling is to say no more contact as I feel its inappropriate when she comes home tonight - but I am worried I would make things worse as I could be creating something that isn't there.Does that make sense>

Any advice please I will be so greatful !!! xx

YANBU FaceTime for kids that age is a recipie for disaster.

I think you maybe need to have a general chat about the use of FaceTime and other such social networking platforms so she can learn to use them sensibly and safely. Impress upon her that others could see the messages and misunderstand what is going on and might lead to trouble for her with her friends.

Thank you both - normally when facetiming her and her friends play giessing games and do shows with their bratz dolls!!!!

I don't think she should be facetiming anyone at that age!

I think you should put a stop to it, yes. The fact that she is saying' why are you saying that, you lovexxxx' sounds to me as if she does not feel comfortable talking to him anyway, as she recognises he is xxx's boyfriend (however strange that sounds about 9 year olds) You may find she is actually relieved if you step in and put a stop to it. It may be beyond what she can handle on her own at just 9.

I wouldn't be letting her face time to chat with friends. DS, aged 7, uses his ipod to facetime but only ever my mum.

Am I being naive to think that at 9 having a boyfriend is just sayong you are going out but in reality holding hands in the the playground?

I also am of the opinion she should not be face timing her mates at all! Too young.

If she is going to Facetime (and I personally think she shouldn't), shouldn't it be downstairs where you can monitor it anyway?

She shouldn't be on ft in the first place. If she wants to chat to her friends they can visit or can do in school. You need to be aware that kids are not as naive these days, yes they are 9 but some are engaging in very adult things. Take the face time away.

I would say no facetime at all at 9 - and def not in private in her own bedroom.

I did wonder of she was a bit young to FT , but then i thought well if she had her friends over they would be upstairs anyway and i wpuldnt hear their conversation then either. Doesn noone elses child ft then? Its seems dd whole class does!
Cockyfox i think the same - a boyfriend just seems to be the title.

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