is it ever ok to ask for a specific type of toy for a babies Christmas/birthday present?

[bluecheeseforbreakfast]

I suspect IABU.

Ds turns 1 in December, both me and DP have huge generous families.

Ds is a very active high energy child, he has been walking for 2 months, he seems to be constantly desperate to reach the next step of his development. I try to keep the toys we have at home fairly simple and subtle so ds can relax and explore them in his own time.

Ds has a few very loud flashing toys that people have given him, he tends to get a bit manic when he plays with these, his breathing gets quicker and he just hits all the buttons and then starts running around holding the toy eventually he throws the toy around (how these toys still work is a mystery to me! those toy companies should make phones, they would be indistructable!) We have one particularly anoying toy that starts playing music 5 minutes after it was last played with, so if ds has moved on to playing with his blocks or is looking at a book he is all of a sudden reminded of the crazy singing toy and starts the hitting/running around/throwing routine again.

I'm not sure if it is just ds who reacts to these sorts of toys this way because he has so much energy or if it is a normal reaction to noisy, bright toys, either way I'd like to avoid it if possible.

Is there a kind and not ungreatful sounding way of asking for maybe brio train set (a couple of bits not an entire train set) plastic animals to go in his little darm (we have a mummy and baby toy pig, he loves them but I think he might enjoy some more animals) books,more blocks, non electronic musical instruments, that sort of thing?

My family are pretty good, they tend to buy books, dp's family tend to buy big electronic play center type things. Dp's family always specify what their kids want on the birthday invite () their kids always want money.

It seems such a waste to keep the toys hidden from ds most of the time (I was thinking we could have a noisy toy saturday playtime and then go to hte park and run off the manic energy) but I don't want to sound ungrateful!

I don't think its ungrateful at all to make suggestions especially ones that still leave the giver some choice about how much they spend.

My parents and in laws do tend to ask if there's anything that DD would like. Failing that, I have dropped some pretty heavy hints (eg looking through a catalogue that came through the door 'ooh, that's a good idea. I bet DD would like something like this'. Or 'I think for Christmas I might get Dd some imaginative toys, they'll last longer'. Or I bring some toys round to their house and comment about how much DD likes her doll in front of them)

Of course it's ok! You write a list and email it to people who you know will be buying DC something. It's what all my family/friends do esp when DC are too young to write a list themselves.

I prefer it when my sisters ask for specific toys for there dc, I would rather a toy got played with than it just sat in a cupboard, big jigs train sets are also brio compatible and far cheaper and just as nice!

Yep, it's absolutely fine and much nicer to steer people towards what you do want than to steer them away from what you don't want, iyswim.

I was thinking the Ikea train set.. I think that is compatable too, must google that!

I'm glad it doesn't seem too unreasonable, I really appreciate the time and money our families spend on gifts, I think I was also guilty of choosing the brightest most flashy toy for young children before I had kids as I assumed that is what a small child would like.

Can you bring up in conversation that you've had to remove all of his flashing/noisy toys because they make him go crazy? even come up with a funny anecdote about his craziness so its not such a blatant 'don't buy my child one of those'?

I've done an Amazon wishlist for DS which people seem to have found helpful. I think you can use them to link to other websites as well.

Youll probably find people sighing with relief because it can be hard to buy for children especially babies.It can be hard especially if you dont know what toys a child already has or is recieving from someone else.

Blimey I hope so!! My DD will be 10 months at Christmas and we have given my in laws some ideas for Christmas because they asked and we researched it to find out what we thought would be good.
I have a brio trainset that was mine as a child and I loved it. I've kept it for her, and more things would be great for that. A lovely wooden trainset is a lovely heirloom gift too that will always be played with

We have a relative who insists on buying what they think DS should have rather than what he'd like. Result is a cupboard full of stuff he won't touch. We have tried (in the nicest possible way) to gently point them in the direction of toys he'd be interested in, but to no avail. It's going to be the same story this Christmas

I think it's great that you are so tuned into his needs - it's ok to suggest toys that won't wind him up - sounds like a good plan.

It depends on your families. On MN many people seem to think that uttering any kind of preference is rudeness on the highest level.

We've done lists since the year my sister got a word processing chip and an owl clock (too babyish) for Christmas. DHs family usually demand lists in the first week of november. If anyone says is there anything ds would particularly like then that's the time to say.