To ask you how much you think is reasonable to spend on Christmas presents

[PMDD]

Between my dh and I we have 9 nieces and nephews that we are close to. 5 siblings and their partners. 4 god children. Also both our parents are divorced so we also have 8 parents/step parent to buy for. We have 3 children that have stockings and presents too.

So in total we have 34 people to buy for.

I buy all the presents over 3-4 months to spread the cost, but the cost is huge.

I spend an average of 25 pounds on everyone other than my own children, which is 750 pounds. I spend about 250 on each of my own children. So 1500 on presents alone.

My dh is horrified and so am I. I can cut back but not to much under 1000.

Is anyone else in this position?

I agree with the 'presents for children only' suggestions. Otherwise, it can get really pricey. I'd also suggest dropping the spend per person if you are going to get for the adults. Unless it's something I know they really want, I wouldn't spend over £15.

I wouldn't be impressed if our families decided they weren't buying for adults. We're all celebrating, it's crazy to ruin the kids and ignore the adults.

Figure out what your budget is first, then split it between how many people you have to buy for, and get your budget per person. Then think about it, and them, carefully, and spend time rather than money finding something they will actually like for that sum.

My present budget is about £400 this year. Our two children will take up about £150 of that, which is a lot but they have a large joint present this year, but it's based on what they would like not how much it cost - as it happens it was under half price anyway.

Everyone else will get something that they will like and they will get us something we like in return and everyone will be happy.

I spend roughly £100 per each of my children (but they are close in age so often it's a joint present of &200) I recon to spend £10-£15 on other peoples children and £20 on grown up immediate family, there are no children except mine in the immediate family.

Simple - As much as you wish to within what you can afford.

In our house that probably amounts to about £80-£100 total on each of our two children, including stocking stuff. By agreement, we don't spend more than a token £10 on other adults in the family, and dh and I don't buy for each other. Maximum of £15 on my nephew and niece. There are no other children. We don't buy for our sons' friends.

We do secret santa for adults - so £10 for my dh's family and £10 for mine. I spend about £25 on each of my children, and spend lots of time playing games with them, Christmas baking and crafts etc, but they always seem to have loads on Christmas day anyway.

This year and last, all presents for children apart from my own have been home made.

eg. painted peg dolls, pencil cases, bags, dolly blanket and pillow...

Last year I managed to "do" the whole of Christmas for £100. I'd spend more if I had more money, but would probably spend it on Christmas outings with the children, visiting friends and family, etc, rather than presents, although there are some lovely things I'd get my children if they really wanted or needed them.

Between us we have 8 nieces and nephews, we spend a tenner on each so £80. We agreed wuth our siblings that we only buy for the kids, works out best for everyone that way!

Also, I buy on amazon and get the giftd gift wrapped and sent straight to them, saves on postage

PS. This means I don't receive any Christmas presents. But I don't mind even a bit.

This yr I've bought for 24 people, total £450 inc Santa. I'm having a gift amnesty with adults in future, I just can't afford it any more.

I don't 'do' presents at all, it all seems to be about greed. A dreadful waste of money on junk that will be forgotten about within days. And frankly I don't remember a single childhood christmas or present! But thanks to you lot the shops and credit card companies do a fantastic trade.

We spend about £25 each on family/family children but we only have 4 nieces/nephews, £10 on friends kids and I have one close friend I spend £20 on. I think £10-15 would be sufficient really (and not stingy). We also have agreed with DHs sister we don't do xmas for each other (so her and her DP) and just birthdays. This saves another £50.

We never spend £250 each on the children, we spend £100, I thought that was a lot (because people said it was). We do overspend if we can (this year they have a PS4 in addition to that due to a small windfall).

We also do the secret santa thing for everyone who attends xmas day dinner, we only spend £5-7 and quite often they are silly/rude pressies.

I'm fairly horrified by how much people spend. Maybe I'm just very poor (I don't feel it) but there's no way I could afford that kind of cash spending. I buy one present at around £20 for my 3 nephews and then get them a token gift each of up to £5 though often it's less. The same for my niece and nephew in the States. Close relatives may have £10-20 spent on them if they're lucky and my child gets a main present of around £25 and a stocking around £10 and I think that's excessive!

I agree that it is nice to buy for the adults too, DHs sister just didn't want to which is fine but we do for DHs dad, my parents and siblings. We also buy for 1 auntie/unle/cousin as are particularly close.

We never buy junk, we always ask each other for ideas which I like as you know you are spending your money on something they like.

I'm wondering whether the adults who don't agree with not doing presents for the adults would want their family and friends to bankrupt themselves to get them a present? I know I wouldn't.

the only thing that grates a tiny bit for me is that I'm the youngest in a big family. My kids are small children whereas most of my nieces and nephews are now adults. When they were kids I faithfully brought them presents every Christmas and birthday. But by the time my kids were born, some within the family had called a stop to present buying. Meaning that my kids birthdays aren't acknowledged whereas their kids had 18 years of presents out of me.

I value my relationship with my family, so I don't make a fuss about it, but I do think that my family have been somewhat disadvantaged by the set up. Actually, my siblings got 'Santa' presents until they were in their 20s, in order to keep the illusion going for me because I was still a child. Whereas big Christmas presents stopped for me at the end of primary school! That's a bit of a pain too!

I agree with stopping gifts for adults when children come along. OP, I'm sure you could find decent gifts with a lower budget for the kids too. You don't need to get hung up on spending exactly the same on everyone either - you could find one perfect gift for a fiver and then splurge £20 on someone else. I never understand people who buy something extra to even things out - if you know the kids will like your £5 present, great!

TreacleSoda - it sound like your kids get the raw end of the deal. In our family we stopped at 18 so the younger ones still got gifts while they were little. But if your kids are happy and they don't know any better, then look on the bright side - less crap to clutter up your home!

That is a shame treacle, our family always bought up to the age of 18 for cousins/nieces/nephews so everyone was treated fairly.

DHs friends all have much older children and he religiously bought birthday and xmas presents for their DCs every year. Once we had ours and asked what his friends DCs wanted for xmas several of them suddenly decided that their dcs got too much so we weren't going to do presents anymore. Great for their DCs who had 10 years of gifts from my then single DH. One or two said that we should stop gifts for their DCs but insist on buying gifts for ours as they are little.

My problem is that my SILs aren't married and are single so eventhough the adults dont buy Eid presents for each other just the kids, they expect/demand a gift.
So then it all falls apart as I cant buy just for DH's sisters, I have to buy for his two SILs as well. I try to do food hampers but my youngest SIL gets jealous of the dc receiving a gift instead of her! She is 36!

I help my kids make presents for everyone ( homemade booze and food in boxes and jars with cool labels, holly wreaths, paintings, ornaments, cloth toys, prints, gosh there's tonnes you can do) and I make most of my kids presents or buy them second hand. Can't abide the expense and waste otherwise. And want to teach my kids that half the joy is in making and giving. Think that wasting money on tat that makes others obliged to waste money on tat is ridiculous and a big scam. Christmas is about the joy of giving, not getting stressed about money. Use your imagination, spend some time inspiring your kids to think
If others and be creative and spend alot less money

And no I don't knit my own lentils. Or spend all my time sahming and blogging. I usually spend a couple of Sunday afternoons doing something fun with the kids. And then sharing that with the rest of the family.

For instance this year we went foraging for berries in autumn, made them into liqueur and took loads of photos. The photos I'm making into Christmas card montages and we'll bottle the booze and make labels next weekend.

For my own children £100 tops seems more than adequate. I buy them one large-ish present, usually costing between £50-£70 and spend the rest on about 6 smaller items such as books, games, CDs, clothes etc. If there was one extra special more expensive thing they desperately wanted I would stretch the budget but I don't see any point in spending more for the sake of it. Plus they get presents from relatives and friends so it all adds up to a pretty overwhelming amount of stuff.

Adding on DC4 who wil be here by next Xmas - £1735!!!

erm... hmm... may have to do some thing about that!

I only do my children and have spent 1800. spend as much as you can afford and no more if it means cutting a few out then go for it.

I now only buy for my own DC. No set budget - depends on what they need/want. Anything from £75 to £350 each.

DH buys for the IL's.

I declared enough was enough a few years back! Christmas has been so much nicer since...

I do buy birthday presents though and give people treats at other times of the year.

We only do presents for children and agree a reasonable budget £20-£30. I also spend less than you do on my DC. We do buy stuff during the year. I just feel that it starts to turn what is supposed to be a happy time into a burden if it becomes too focussed on spending lots of money.

We are comfortable so it isn't about what we can afford but more about what we want to afford IYSWIM.

Thank goodness DH's family don't do family presents for Eid he is one of 10 with loads and loads of nephews and neices.