to lock the cats outside and not feed them today?

[hestergraysgarden]

They had four sachets each yesterday. Four. Sachets.

And dried food.

This morning I came downstairs and thought it was unusual that they were not in the kitchen yowling for their breakfast - they usually start 'serenading' us at around 6 am but this morning there was blissful silence.

Then I found the roast chicken.

It was leftover from dinner yesterday. Carefully wrapped in foil, and put in the oven, ready for me to make another dinner with it tonight. The oven was definitely closed when I went to bed because I know what they are like with food, especially chicken. Those little fuckers managed to open the oven door in the night and pick it down to a bony carcass

WTAF?!?! Did they grow opposable thumbs in the night?!?!

Little fuckers.

Are they looking all smug?

What resourceful and intelligent felines.
An American friend had a pet raccoon with similar skills and a passion for expensive chocolate.

I would shut them out purely on the basis that if they've eaten chicken that's been sitting at room temp for hours they could possibly be throwing their guts up any time soon.

On the plus side you clearly have very talented cats!

We had to put a childproof lock on the 'fridge when we didn't have children. Big Ben cat would open it and the others would all gather round and help themselves

I don't think locking them outside will help - they have probably got a key

Clever cats, I think you should reward them for their ingenuity

my dog opened the oven and stole our spare roast potatoes the other week
they are evil thieving gits

Why wasn't it in the fridge? I'd have thought it should be refrigerated.

I feel your pain ,clever cats!

Oh dear!

(BTW - you really shouldn't leave it in the oven - it should be in the fridge. All it was doing was growing a lovely culture of bacteria - so probably best that the cats had it anyway)

runs to kitchen to check oven for left over Yorkshire puds

Yanbu, my cat isn't that clever but as soon as any meat comes out the fridge he is desperate to get in the kitchen.

My cat is also wowling himself through mountains of food.

Are they fattening up for the winter?

It would be in the fridge, but we've just done a weekly shop and there isn't room. I was going to try and make room in there this morning but I suppose I should be grateful they've saved me one job. Maybe they were trying to save me from food poisoning?

Somehow I doubt it.

We took them to the vets a couple of weeks ago about their appetites, thinking they have worms. Nope. It turns out the iddy-biddy moggie kittens we got three years ago are actually Maine Coons of dubious pedigree, which would explain why they are still growing.

There is nothing wrong with them. They are just greedy fuckers.

Further inspection has revealed paw prints on top of the oven, right at the edge. The oven opens downwards, so all I can think is that they stood on top of the oven and levered it somehow.

They are currently sitting insouciently on the patio...

YABU.

If you lock them out they will have more time to spend annoying people who don't want them in their gardens.

Lock them in the house, but out of the kitchen instead.

Many many years ago, my Mom had cooked a humunguous turkey (22 lbs or something) for Xmas. On Boxing Day, we'd left to go visit relatives in another part of the country, leaving my uncle (who lived with us at the time) in charge of the house and responsible for looking after Firstcat.

Got back a week later to find my uncle just a tad sulky.

Mum: Did you manage OK, Uncle'sName?

Uncle: Fine - although I would have thought you could leave me some turkey.

Mum: But I did! I left the whole .................

what intelligent Cats

I feel your pain/annoyance with feeding as I have two Maine coons n they never stop eating .

I've made the mistake many a time of leaving cooked meat or fish to cool on the side, and have had it devoured (or at the least chewed). I now cool off roasts etc in another room, with a shut door, or, if it's small enough to fit, in the microwave.

Am surprised all these animals can open oven doors though. Mine have never managed that - would have thought the catch was too stiff no matter how determined they were hooking their paws round the edge of the door. Mind you, have caught them trying to sample what was cooking on top of the hob before now.

And let them rub cat shit into the wound, WooWooOwl? Not bloody likely! Am still recovering from the time they learned how to open the cellar door and spent several weeks using it as their personal litter tray before poor DH went down for a can of paint and nearly asphixiated on the fumes (how they didn't drift up into the kitchen is beyond me).

Cozietoesie

(We found some bones in a cavity under the kitchen seating a few days later.)

Cats

Now I would have said that Firstcat was too lazy as well, Preciousbane. It's just a question of motivation.

Maine Coons?
Like having teenagers.
I had a cat that could open doors, knobs or handles were no obstacle.

Our kitten ate a whole bowl of brandy sauce one Xmas. We wondered why he was staggering around...and then we found the evidence.

My Maine Coon is a greedy bastard too (but a cat of very little brain - he has difficulty jumping onto the bed without falling off so would not manage the work surface, never mind being able to open the oven). He managed to access the dining table yesterday when I was in the throes of taking everything out to the kitchen after lunch (he can get onto the table as he can go via a chair and the window sill) and finished off the banana pudding that was sitting in its dish waiting to be put away.

After reading all your posts about Maine Coon antics I have decided that things are evidently not going to get better, so I request your help in wording this advertisement, which I plan to put up in the window of my local newsagents…

Free to Good Home

Two Maine Coon / Audrey II cross-breeds. 3 years old.

Feeding requirements: One 48-pack of never-on-offer steamed fish sachets every two days, one potato sackful of dried food every week, supplemented by the contents of your fridge and any unattended items. Washed down with water from a running tap or unflushed toilet. Followed by a kiss.

Leisure activities: Audreycoons do not require scratch posts as they are clever enough to source superior scratching stations. But if you forget this and purchase one anyway, never fear, they will jog your memory by tearing up your landing carpet and destroying the back of a door.

Cultural considerations: Audreycoons are Satanists and as such require access to a steady supply of adolescent rats for their weekly ritual killing, which will take place in your kitchen, and involve the regurgitation of unidentified rat gloop in the four corners of the room, and on the threshold of the internal door for you to step on when entering the kitchen, thus completing the ritual. Head will remain intact to add to their collection of religious artifacts. The appropriate place to store these is underneath the oven, but the backs of cabinets and fridges will also suffice.

Other notes: Audreycoons have a mortal fear of chickens and vacuum cleaners. They like to sleep on your face. Audreycoons weigh approximately 700lbs.