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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What do I get nanny for Christmas?

50 replies

mamayaya · 20/11/2013 21:51

Sorry am crap and can't find the chat or Christmas sections!

Nanny has been fab. Only does after school 4 days a wk, 1 dd and only since September but I split up with partner a month ago and she has been great - extra hours (paid for obviously!) as he wasn't there when would have been previously, really flexible. And so sweet and nice.

She is 23, works as teaching assistant in a primary in mornings, and is a pretty cool girl, has a bit of an Afro going on, cool clothes. Lives at home with her dad. (Ie I don't know what accessories/bracelet I thought initially to get her as is frankly cooler than me and no stuff for house).

My budget is a bit limited due to split, I would like to spend £30 if poss but will go a bit more and up to £50 if necessary.

Any ideas?! I am at a loss and only coming up with vouchers or cash. I gave her £20 for her birthday recently and she said she hadn't received any presents from family (think they may be Jehovah's witnesses) so i would quite like to buy her something nice...

Thanks for any ideas in advance!

OP posts:
ConventGarden · 20/11/2013 21:54

90% vouchers and 10% a thoughtful chosen gift from you xx

stoopstofolly · 20/11/2013 21:55

Presents are nice if you can think of something perfect for them- but I'm never that organised! I've given my nanny (also after school 4 days per week!) £50 M&S vouchers for the last few years. I know she appreciates being able to buy what she wants with them.

gordyslovesheep · 20/11/2013 21:55

ask her?

Catnap26 · 20/11/2013 21:58

Cinema vouchers?

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 20/11/2013 22:00

I would say cash in a nice Christmas card.

Catnap26 · 20/11/2013 22:01

Love to shop vouchers?covers lots of things then.i think vouchers is the way to go that way she can get what she wants.also perhaps get your dd to make something for her,it will be nice and personal.

NomDeClavier · 20/11/2013 22:01

Tough one! I see why you want to give her a physical gift although usually vouchers/cash is appreciated. What about something everyone needs but nice, like pens or notebook?

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 20/11/2013 22:03

Agree with CoventGarden- mostly vouchers but something small and thoughtful from you and DD.

Definitely a homemade, sparkly, gluey, messy, lovely card from DD!

Caitlin17 · 20/11/2013 22:05

To be honest, unless the vouchers are for shops she really, really likes I'd give a Christmas cash bonus and a box of chocolates/ bottle of wine. She won't be earning much and if it were me I'd prefer she can get something she really wants. Thats what I did when I had a full time nanny.

Original poster
mamayaya · 20/11/2013 22:19

Oh my god thank you for so many replies! Been doing my ironing. In my dressing gown. With a glass of red wine. Being a single mum is ok.

So if I give her say £30 cash plus say a nice diary as know she uses one and a bottle of wine and a home-made card from dd that is good??

OP posts:
Caitlin17 · 20/11/2013 22:23

That sounds good. I honest think a cash bonus is fine for the main gift.

Catnap26 · 20/11/2013 22:23

I would be pretty chuffed with that Smile

foreverondiet · 20/11/2013 22:28

Money, I think convention is to give extra weeks salary.

Original poster
mamayaya · 20/11/2013 22:35

I think a week's salary is beyond my means.... I pay her cash in hand (at her request) but have paid her when we were on holiday, when dd was sick and me off work so didn't need her and when exp has picked her up from school instead of normal 6pm so don't feel I'm tight in general, just a bit pushed at present as am paying her alone plus all bills. My ex is unreliable to say the least Confused

What about say topshop or house of Fraser vouchers? I am feeling major stress about this for some reason - prob as no 'd'p to buy for! Thanks for advice..!

OP posts:
Caitlin17 · 20/11/2013 22:44

I honestly can't remember how much I gave, it might have been as much as a week's salary, but my situation was different. When I had nannies they were full time employees who only worked for me, they paid tax and I paid employer's NI and OH and I both worked full-time.

What you suggested, £30 and a nice gift sounds fine. I really wouldn't go down the voucher route.

Talkinpeace · 20/11/2013 22:48

I pay her cash in hand (at her request)
hate to put a damper but be VERY careful as you are not in compliance with employment law

Caitlin17 · 20/11/2013 22:57

Talkinpeace, not necessarily, it depends on whether the girl is an employee. When DS was too old to need a full time nanny but still needed after school collection we used a nanny who was legitimately self employed and worked for at least 2 other families who also didn't need full time care.She paid her own tax and self employed NI.

Talkinpeace · 21/11/2013 12:40

we are drifting rapidly O/T but its an important issue.
If you pay somebody cash in hand who works for you, YOU are the one potentially committing the offence if checked.
If they are self employed, ask for their UTR and a written receipt, even if paying cash.
Tie up your camel, THEN trust in Allah

cingolimama · 21/11/2013 12:45

The best gift from an employer is always CASH!!!!

hettienne · 21/11/2013 12:49

A regular job working 4 days a week will be an employed position - it doesn't matter that it is part time or if she has another job.

OP - if you are paying her illegally then be very careful, it is you that can be caught and fined not her.

valiumredhead · 21/11/2013 13:32

Cash, always!Grin in a lovely xmas card.

luckylavender · 21/11/2013 13:49

If she's a Jehovah's Witness then a present and a card may not be at all appropriate. Ditto wine.

WaitMonkey · 21/11/2013 13:50

I like your idea and Topshop vouchers would be good.

Pigsmummy · 21/11/2013 20:40

Cash. That never offends

Beastofburden · 21/11/2013 21:10

Cash and diary sound good. Wine, as long as it won't cause ructions with her dad.

But you ought to be paying tax and NI - she is so not self employed.