sex offender wants to see his son?

[pajamapants1]

My ex partner has recently being sentenced with 5years on the sex offenders register and a 3year community order for sex offenders rehabillitation. He rang me the other day saying he wants to see his son, social services have told him he's allowed. I rang ss asking if this is correct and they said yes, the only thing I can do is get a residency order and a no contact order against him. They said this is because my son was not a direct victim. Can anyone shed any light on if this is true or not? I can't understand why they would allow something like this?
Thankyou for any help! Posted on legal too but posting here for traffic.

OK ready for the flaming

OP have you ever, even for a second, suspected he was a danger to your son?

2000 images are not downloaded in a day. He was doing this while he was seeing his son (I don't mean while your son was in the room I mean over a period of years),

I know this is not a victimless crime. I know the conviction is for a serious offence but surely there are two questions.

Is the father a danger to his son?

Is there any reason to stop contact if he isn't? By that I mean do they have a good relationship? Would your son miss out from breaking contact?

Before the flaming, a conviction does not necessarily mean he is going to hurt his son. Yesterday we had a long thread deleted which was basically about a mother leaving her daughter with mother's boyfriend and the child being murdered. As far as I know that was that man's first offence, no convictions up until then but there were warning signs.

I agree with all the comments about talking to SS and the police officer in charge of 'managing' your ex.

I can't understand why they would allow something like this? Because the court issues the punishment in this country. Because your son may not be deemed to be at risk.

Taking out any offences and who might have said he is allowed to see his son- your ex has asked for contact. You don't want him to have contact. You say no, then the onus is on your ex to pursue this through court.

Do you think he will do this bearing in mind the costs and the hassle? Is it worth just digging your heels in and saying no to se what he will do next?

sashh - just because the son may not be 'at risk' of being sexually abused by his father does not mean that the father isn't a danger.

IMO, as parents we are there to influence; guide and shape our children and somebody guilty of such disgusting crimes should therefore have no part in any child's upbringing.

OP: Say no to him.
Let him take you to court.

You must be devasted.
Best wishes to you.

Different jurisdiction (Scotland), but I have a relative on the sex offenders register for offences against young teenage girls (so technically a hebophile -sp? - but still absolutely horrid). Police advice (which believe me I didn't need - was more than happy to follow this course of action off my own bat) is no contact, not because DS (being male and younger) is at direct risk, but because of the possibility of undue influence and normalising this sort of behaviour.

Agree with others - lawyer, residency order, no unsupervised contact.

I'm a criminal lawyer and we've had a big surge of arrests for this type of offence recently - various reasons, including other countries getting on board, and reporting stuff on their sites to UK police.

The SS involvement is extremely inconsistent, from area to area, and even within the same area. My involvement effectively ends at sentence, but we do occasionally have questions from SS, or from the client.

Sometimes SS look at the types of image - eg male or female. Sometimes they take the automatic view that there is a risk and say contact should be supervised in the first instance. Sometimes they say no risk up to the point of conviction and then suddenly jump into action. Sometimes they faff around and change their mind.

Your problem is that this is after that process, so the onus may well be on you to dig your heels in and let him take you to court, at which point SS should be told to get involved.

Thanks for all the replies, my fear is that if I wait for him to take me to court he may get access supervised/unsupervised andI would have to allow it, were as if I took out a no contact order first then surely that would make it harder for him? sashh would you let a convicted sex offender see your child? I got a text this morning saying he loves me and we need to get back together we've been split for 6 years. He just wants to cause my family hell he could hardly be bothered to see ds before unless it was convinient for him!

Pyjama I would ignore all communication from him, and take advice from the experts from here. I am so this seems quite frequent

I would contact the experts on here littlewhitebag, and kungfung. Spero is another mumsnetter with experience

I can't actually believe what I'm reading! What's wrong with the world?! If he's a registered sex offender then surely everybody in the world would agree that's he's given up any rights he had to see his son?

Unbelievable.

So sorry for you OP.