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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that a 4 yo and a 6 yo don't need to go in a stroller?

81 replies

princessalbert · 15/11/2013 16:36

Saw this on tripadvisor earlier

^Hi there. I have a baby jogger elite and am thinking of going to Paris.

Did you face any issues?

I have a 4 and 6 year old and that is why an umbrella stroller is not an option but having just came back from Tokyo, the stroller really saved our backs (imagine having to carry a 4 and 6 year old that you can't expect to walk the whole day)^

I cannot imagine putting my Ds in a pushchair at age 4, let alone 6. Am I the only one who found this bizarre????

OP posts:

Gileswithachainsaw · 15/11/2013 18:15

I think it's also important to remember that this isn't just round the local town. They could be flying late at night and just wanting the kids to be able to rest whilst waiting for cars/taxis to show up or for the long walks between attractions they plan to see.

Not worth ruining a holiday over a buggy tbh.

GoldenGytha · 15/11/2013 18:18

We hired pushchairs for 4 year old DD2 when we went to Florida,

Her 7 year old sister declined the offer of a "shotty" though,

Doesn't bother me what other parents do with their DC, none of my business.

SpookedMackerel · 15/11/2013 18:18

I think it's one of those things where, once you stop doing it, it very quickly seems odd and babyish. Whereas if you don't stop, it's just that thing you do and doesn't seem babyish at all. (Well maybe by age 6 it does a bit, but I can see how you could get to 4 still using it sometimes.)

Our buggy broke just before dd turned 2, so she had to walk. I occasionally miss being able to load it up with shopping bags, but generally life is easier without it - we don't have a car so use the bus a lot, and I hate buggies on buses.
But if it hadn't broken, i'd probably still be using it sometimes.

Maybe people get into a bit of a habit of using them when they don't need them, and it just hasn't occurred to them to stop. OR maybe they really do need to use them, they have good reasons that we know nothing about, they haven't just drifted into it. You can't know about specific individuals - yes, most 6 year olds wouldn't need to be in a buggy, a minority perhaps do.

teacherwith2kids · 15/11/2013 18:19

Missponty,

That's a point. They may well be the kind of parents who want to be able to have 'exactly the same holiday as they have child-free', make no concessions to the children at all and are using a pushchair as a way of allowing them to do this.

(We have relatives like this -never take their children's needs into account in ANYTHING - i really do mean anything -and then moan mightily that e.g. their children 'spoilt the holiday' by 'being noisy during our 14 hour non-stop drive across France to get home' - and yes, that is a judgy remark but oooh, those poor children)

intitgrand · 15/11/2013 18:26

I can think of circumstances where people might want to put kids that age in a buggy.Certainly when you are out all day everyday so the kids can have a nap during the day meaning you dn't have to be back for bed at 7 pm.Or when you have many children to keep an eye on in a busy place it might be good to have the opportunity of containing the 2 smallest.
Also my dsis had a virus at 6 or 7 which gave her rheumatism for several weeks afterwards.She hated being in a pushchair, but her legs just hurt too much to walk for a few weeks

Mattissy · 15/11/2013 18:34

We went on a very walking heavy holiday when dd was 3.11, we took the stroller. It was more to do with the speed she'd walk rather than her ability to walk. She rarely got in it. On the other hand, my ds, who was 8.0 would've happily sat in it the whole time, in fact had to be tipped out of it several times, lazy sod! Lol

KnittedJimmyChoos · 15/11/2013 18:38

Oh dear, oh to see the world in such a black and white way

LondonNinja · 15/11/2013 18:45

Oh, who cares??

No one would judge parents who ferry the kids everywhere in a car, but would judge a parent me for walking to the park, running around and then sitting child in a buggy because I cannot physically carry all my shopping home as well as a tired child?!

Really, it's no one else's biz.

inhibernation · 15/11/2013 18:47

My dd is 4 and I use a buggy for her when I collect her from school. She has Cerebral Palsy and is also recovering from neurosurgery. It may not be obvious to the other parents that she's disabled so yes some of them stare probably wondering why a girl in Reception is in a buggy. At some point we'll switch to a wheelchair. People will still stare only I expect it'll be a more pitying type of stare.

MrsSchadenfreude · 15/11/2013 19:19

I think if they don't have any special/additional needs, and are not ill, then children of 4 and 6 don't need to go in a buggy. Neither of mine used a buggy after the age of 3, and they had a 25 minute walk to nursery every day.

DoItTooJulia · 15/11/2013 19:28

Judgemental drivel OP.

MYOB.

smileyhappymummy · 15/11/2013 19:37

I went to disney Paris with my 10 month old and 6 year old this summer. We took a pushchair and there were times when the baby went in the sling while the 6 year old had a rest in the pushchair For example walking back to the hotel after watching fireworks when it was 11.30pm and she was exhausted. She didn't NEED to go in the pushchair and I wouldn't have taken one just for her but it was nicer for her and for us at times. No regrets.

Lucyccfc · 15/11/2013 19:40

When my DS was 4, we took a stroller to Disneyland Paris and he happily used it. When he was 6 We also took advantage of the free stroller/buggies at Doha airport at 10pm, when we had 3 hours to wait for a connecting flight. He wasn't impressed, but soon fell asleep in it.

ImTenAPenny · 15/11/2013 19:41

Yabu just a bit.
My dd is nearly 3 1/2 and I fully intend to use the stroller right through winter and into spring where she will be almost 4 and will take it on holiday when she will be 4.
On holiday back in august it was 40 'c and even I couldn't walk 15-20 mins without having to seek shade and rest and I certainly would not ever expect a child of any age up to 6 to be walking in that.

After the age of 5-6 I would assume there was maybe a mobility issue for a dc in a buggy and would mind my own business.

PiratePanda · 15/11/2013 19:46

We don't have a car and we walk everywhere, often several miles in a day. For short trips we now go out with just the scooter, but anything longer than about 2 miles and DS 3 won't walk any further and insists on going on my shoulders. Frankly I'd rather push him in a pram despite feeling a little embarrassed that he's too old for it.

I do wish people would stop judging on this subject; you have no idea what their circumstances are.

Cheesy123 · 15/11/2013 20:00

My seven year old would sit in pushchair if I let her! My 2 and 5 year olds won't!

womblesofwestminster · 15/11/2013 20:10

The thing that makes me force my 3 year old into her buggy is the sodding dawdling that would occur otherwise. Takes an hour to get to the corner shop. Sod that!

GobbolinoCat · 15/11/2013 20:25

I was out with a friend once and we saw an older child in a stroller, she said to me " thats the sort of thing me and my sister dont like to see, look why on earth isnt that child walking"

She and her sister never bloody walked anywhere! They were total car freaks, driving the shortest distances everywhere. they would never ever walk into town with the pushcair to get shopping or anything like that.

so YUABU.

BakeOLiteGirl · 15/11/2013 20:45

This really fucks me off this argument. I don't have a car or drive and I walk miles. Sometimes my six year old sits in the bottom of my Phil and Teds and the three year old in the top because they are knackered. Yet It is OK to drive children in cars for shorter distances.

sharesinNivea · 15/11/2013 20:55

Oh my god. I had a pushchair obsession amd actually cried when I sold my last one, a Bee, several months ago as my son had reached school age. Now I find so many people still using them at age 4, I'm beginning to feel intrigued at the thought of getting another pushchair again!

The only thing that puts me off is looking daft with a 4 year old in one, but I admit I do miss it for carting shopping around as I don't drive. My 6 year oldies a notoriously slow walker amd the 4 year old is going that way too. They get plenty of outdoor exercise not having a family car, but the thought of getting another Nipper or Landrover is intriguing (he was too big for the Bee even at 18 months really).

PoppyWearer · 15/11/2013 21:06

My 5yo still needs a buggy on big days out where lots of walking is needed because of (real, proper, diagnosed) mobility problems that result in acute pain if she overdoes it.

Not severe enough a mobility problem to be classed as a disability or require a wheelchair, and most definitely not evident to the uninformed passer-by, unless I do some LOUD PARENTING asking her how much pain she is in it has been known .

We get a LOT of judgemental looks when out and about, especially as I do tend to drive to school rather than walk these days, when it isn't that far. But all of her energy is consumed by school-based PE. And she can't even managed all of that.

I don't give a shit. I would rather she sits in the buggy and people judge me than that she suffers another second of pain. Should I buy a wheelchair so that people don't judge? What's the point when she is still small enough to fit in a buggy?

"Children have loads of energy, no?" Well, actually, no. Mine doesn't.

YABU, OP. We are going on a city break next year and we will absolutely be taking a buggy.

Lilicat1013 · 15/11/2013 21:35

I am amazed that anyone is able to push a double buggy with a four year old and six year old in, that must be heavy. My own pushchair is hard to push when my older son uses his buggy board and that is with a three year old and a baby.

I used to think quite judgmental thoughts about older children in pushchairs (just think them, not stare or make comments) but since have a son with additional needs and meeting more parents of children with additional needs I am much more aware of the reasons that an older child may use a pushchair.

Even if additional needs aren't a factor I am more aware in general that you can't judge a family's situation from a tiny snapshot of their lives. I try and think twice now before jumping to conclusions, not that it always works but I do try to remind myself I really know nothing about their situation.

madamginger · 15/11/2013 21:46

I have 3 year old ds2 in the buggy for the school run, he is a dawdler and takes bloody hours to walk anywhere.
I don't give a shiney shit what anyone thinks so yabu.

Pearlsaplenty · 15/11/2013 22:09

I definitely think a 4 year old could do with a stroller for a busy day of sightseeing. I know quite a few 3-4 year olds who have strollers as they walk a lot.

6 year old, not so much but it depend on the size of the child/fitness levels etc. I guess it would be good option to have.

bobblehead · 15/11/2013 22:17

We specifically bought a cheap stroller for dd1 when we went to Disneyworld when she was 6 (already had an old one for dd2 who was 4). We were walking around the parks for around 12 hours a day, having late nights and it was a life saver especially if we wanted to get somewhere quick! She walked alot too but it made the holiday so much more enjoyable being able to put hot tired kids into a buggy!

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