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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not help my friend finding a new accommodation?

9 replies

SweetSkull · 14/11/2013 11:39

My friend's landlady gave them notice so now they are desperate to find somewhere to leave. They want a 2 bedroom flat.

She called me yesterday asking for help because I have lived in the are for quite a long time and have moved whit in the area a lot too. Also I know lots of people and have experience searching in the rights websites and dealing with landlords, agencies, etc. They are new-ish to London and don't speak/read English very well.

So she was telling me that she would definitely not move to certain area of the town because there are too many Muslims there...

Now, our town is nice and is fairly mixed, it has people from so many different countries/cultures and backgrounds...but there is one part of the town where there are essentially white English people with money and she would have to move over there if she wants to avoid having Muslims leaving near by. Problem is she can't afford living in there.

She can't even afford to move TBH, they have no money for deposit or rent upfront and they currently live in a damp 1 bedroom flat (2 adults and 2 kids -7 and 1). Once she brought her buggy inside the flat for the night and it was full of mould following morning.
They will be extremely lucky if they find another decent 1 bedroom flat for what they pay (dodge landlady/crap property/ no contract, etc), never mind a 2 bedroom in a 'naice' enough area where there will be less Muslims around...

Anyway, I work full time, I have my family, my hobbies and interests. But I am always making time to help her out and she usually asks for a lot of help.

But this time, I think will pass, because I don't want to hear crap like this anymore and I am even concerned now to be seen as a friend of someone who has such shallow views.

I am not sure if she is pure racist and ignorant or just blinded by her own religion...also in the country where we come from, we don't get so many foreigners so maybe she is still getting used to the mixture in London...(not really an excuse I don't think...)

OP posts:
Helpyourself · 14/11/2013 11:44

Straight to the homeless persons unit! They'll be in a better position without your help by the by and she sounds a 'mare!

SweetSkull · 14/11/2013 11:47

Oh they can't go to the homeless unit because they need to live in this area and to be close enough to her daughter's 'naice' faith school.

And ooops sorry for the English mistakes in the OP.

OP posts:
Quoteunquote · 14/11/2013 11:49

www.shelter.org.uk

give her shelter contact details, sand end her details of places she can afford, no matter where they are located, she will just have to get over herself, who knows she might find after moving she might realise her mistake and like her new neighbours.

SweetSkull · 14/11/2013 13:38

Thanks

I'm not sure about their immigration status and I'm not sure wether becoming homeless will affect their right to remain in the UK.
Also the husband works full time apparently, so they could find cheaper accommodation in other areas in London.
But they want this area here.
I know they have friends in less desirable areas and they never wanted leave near them.
Also they can't read English very well so I ft think I will direct them to CAB. Spoken English is easier for them.

OP posts:
ophelia275 · 14/11/2013 13:56

Where is she from? If it is part of the EU then wouldn't they have the right to some housing benefit? Perhaps she has had bad experiences in her home country with some Muslims and is scared (irrationally)?

SweetSkull · 14/11/2013 14:08

There are no Muslims in our home country.
They aren't from EU union and by what they say regarding immigration status and income, they would certainly be entitled to some benefits but they don't 'want' to claim anything I'm not sure why. I've tried to help towards claiming in the past, but they don't fully disclose what is their situation and they seems to use a solicitor for everything regarding the law...also there has been some lies in the past, the friend said something to me and something else to other friend when we both were helping them through some other difficult situation (visa).....

OP posts:
SweetSkull · 14/11/2013 14:09

So I'm a bit wary now and not wanting to involved myself in unnecessary drama...

OP posts:
EldritchCleavage · 14/11/2013 15:27

I've tried to help towards claiming in the past, but they don't fully disclose what is their situation and they seems to use a solicitor for everything regarding the law...also there has been some lies in the past

Keep your distance I think. If they aren't going to be honest with the authorities then you can't really afford to get involved.

AdoraBell · 14/11/2013 15:36

Yep, don't Get involved passed 'CAB is on this street', if you really want To help them.

I definitely wouldn't want To end up having to explain my involvement in a visa aplicación process where someone was found To be less than completely honest. Even if it was only To help translating a few words.

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