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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find this woman to be needlessly bloody rude?

34 replies

Chrissy178 · 08/11/2013 12:00

Had to go downtown to get my 3 year old DS re-registered since DH and I married after his birth. After we did that we decided to look around the shops since we had £6 left on an M&S card to spend.

As we walked along outside the shops in the centre we mostly stuck to walking by the walls, there wasn't a lot of people about so plenty of room to walk around us. Some woman walking toward us, instead of walking around us, pushes past DH and DS and hisses at DH "move your bloody child then". DS didn't seem bothered by it but it really irked me. AIBU or was there any need to be so rude?

I suppose I wanted to vent since this morning has been pretty shit. I had to bite my tongue after a cyclist tore up the path nearly hitting our pram with our 2 week old DD in while we were walking to registry office. :/

OP posts:
CocacolaMum · 08/11/2013 12:04

No she sounded like an utter cow. Some people are just mean.

Amy106 · 08/11/2013 12:10

You are not being unreasonable. There was no need for her to be so miserable and so unkind.

MrsWolowitz · 08/11/2013 12:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2goatytocare · 08/11/2013 12:12

She sounds like a misery, what did your DH say?

SkinnybitchWannabe · 08/11/2013 12:12

Oh thats made my blood boil!
I would not have bitten my tongue.
Rude bitch

Lvcat · 08/11/2013 12:13

I have found that the general public, in general, are massive dicks.

You're not being unreasonable. What a miserable b@&ch xxx

Goldenbear · 08/11/2013 12:15

She was rude and I would've told her so. Mind you, depends on her age. If she was really old I wouldn't have said anything. We live in a block of flats and an lady who is in her late 60's is always moaning at us about various issues as she is the head of the board of residents. DP just laughs in response to her moaning at us as he says he's not going to engage in a cross verbal exchange with an old lady. This woman is only a little older than our own Mothers!

Original poster
Chrissy178 · 08/11/2013 12:16

DH just carried on walking, he doesn't like to pick fights or argue with anyone. I wasn't even aware she'd said anything until he told me. It did anger him more than it did me though, as he's downstairs right now ranting about it to FIL - and when those two start ranting, it could last a while. ^^;

OP posts:
Original poster
Chrissy178 · 08/11/2013 12:17

The lady looked about my age - mid-20's.

OP posts:
neiljames77 · 08/11/2013 12:27

There's nothing wrong in expecting good manners. I held the door open for a woman recently at a shopping centre. I hold the door open for anyone, rather than let it just close in someone's face. She just gave me a dirty look and walked past me. I said sarcastically, "don't mention it". She then turned around and said to me, "what d'you want? a f*ing round of applause?"
I didn't have to say anything though as another woman who was nearby decided to verbally tear a strip off her.

squeakytoy · 08/11/2013 12:29

"there wasn't a lot of people about so plenty of room to walk around us"

not sure why you expect everyone to walk around you... and I am wondering if you were one of those families all holding hands so that other people HAVE to dance around you to get past..

Original poster
Chrissy178 · 08/11/2013 12:38

No, we weren't all holding hands. DH held DS' hand, I was pushing DD's pram a little way behind them. This was in a huge shopping centre.

We're not the type of people who expect others to bend over backwards for us. We are more than willing to move out of other people's way and (I especially as a result of social anxiety) don't like inconveniencing others. What really irked me was the way she referred to my son, the tone she used - all in front of him.

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 08/11/2013 12:42

Pedantic comment Squeakytoy. How have you managed to conclude all that from that bit of description? There was plenty of room - that is the point. Even if they were walking together, the ample space around would've allowed this to be a harmless activity!

SeaSickSal · 08/11/2013 12:44

She was rude and horrible. But I wouldn't let it bother you, who knows what had happened that day to make her like that. Just don't give it headspace, why should it spoil your day.

harticus · 08/11/2013 12:46

Forget about it.
World is full of arseholes - don't let her take up a millisecond more of your day.

everythinghippie29 · 08/11/2013 12:50

The lady looked around my age- mid 20's

She ain't no lady! What a horrible person.

I had an old 'dear' shake her head and sigh loudly at me today because I didn't 'move' enough/ quickly to allow her to pass in a small shopping aisle. I know I'm 8 months pregnant, huge and slow, but it made me sad. Sad

Goldenbear · 08/11/2013 12:51

I'm the kind of entitled person that expects to walk how I want and with whom I want without some rude misery telling me to move my child out of the way.

scubastevie · 08/11/2013 12:57

Just remember she must be really sad/have a shit day/life /jealous of you whatever to be that angry and rude to someone. Pity her and be glad you're not that sort of person, and get on with your own fab life :)

ZangelbertBingeldac · 08/11/2013 13:01

In these sort of situations I try to have a think about whether there was anything I could have done differently.

She was obviously very rude, and YANBU about that.

But I don't walk around just expecting other people to walk around me. The world is based on give and take, so I would have shown more courtesy to others than you were showing.

Quangle · 08/11/2013 13:05

A couple of years ago I took the DCs (then 20 months and 3) to Brighton for the day. Just me and two toddlers. We went by tube to Victoria station so to get from the underground to the main station we had to walk up lots of steps. I had the buggy and all our stuff slung over my back and a child in each hand plus the little one was holding onto the hand rail. I deliberately chose a quiet staircase so we could take our time and it was only about 20 steps. Plus it was 9am on Sunday morning so pretty empty.

As we were about half way up I heard shouting and assumed it was not related to us. Finally I realised two youngish women behind us (in their twenties or thirties - both with enormous suitcases) were shouting at us. And they were shouting "get your effing children out of the way" over and over again.

I would never expect a stranger to offer me help in a situation like that - although it would be gratefully received. But to shout abuse at me? Who are these people?

Of course YANBU. Some people are really unhinged.

vtechjazz · 08/11/2013 13:05

So....your DH and DS, two abreast followed by you and pram, yes? So, entire group no more than two wide. Nope, yanbu....and if I can't find fault in pavement etiquette nobody can!

vtechjazz · 08/11/2013 13:10

Wow, cross post with zangel who obviously can. This woman saw a group, had time to asses the situation and still managed to get right up in their faces before barging through....she was entirely at fault.

Goldenbear · 08/11/2013 13:14

I expect people not to walk into me- how else does society function successfully if we are all so het up about our 'right' to not have to walk around someone with a pram and toddler, despite there being ample room to do so- ridiculous!

ZangelbertBingeldac · 08/11/2013 13:17

"if we are all so het up about our 'right' to not have to walk around someone with a pram and toddler"

Sorry, I missed the bit where people were talking about their 'rights' and getting 'so het up' about these rights. Can you point it out, please Goldenbear.

pianodoodle · 08/11/2013 13:21

Mind you, depends on her age. If she was really old I wouldn't have said anything.

I would have! I'm not going to give some rude mare a pardon just because she's old.

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