To tell my kids to stay away from the cat?

[LittleMissGerardPoppyButler]

The (not so) darling husband is taking the kids to see his sister and her partners new house at the weekend while I am working. Obviously i mustnt want to see the new house as he couldn't wait until next weekend when I'm free

Anyway they have had a rescue cat for a couple of months who is aggressive and has attacked them more than a couple of times. (I know this as they regularly post this on fb)

He was talking to the kids tonight about how exciting it was, and I said be careful of the cat please. He rolled his eyes so I asked why, he said oh don't be stupid let them make their own mind up!

The kids are 7 and 6 and already a bit wary of animals (I try to encourage them but not force them). I am worried that this cat is going to scare them.

So was I being unreasonable to tell them to be careful and ask for them not to be left alone with the cat?

I have nothing against cats by the way, and I am fully prepared to be flamed. :o

Why are they wary of animals anyway?

I don't know why, eldest is very sensitive to noise, and very jumpy (has other quirks too, currently discussing with school SENCO) and think youngest just copies him a bit.

I'm not a huge animal lover but I don't mind them.

My three cats insist you are BU. I wouldn't take much notice of them though. They're all thoroughly soppy idiots who wouldn't hurt a fly, and the biggest one allows my youngest nieces to ride her like a horse whenever they visit.

as you can see from my user name i am a cat person but you are not being unreasonable if the cat is child aggressive better at their age that they are wary than have a life long fear of cats , one of my cats isnt that keen on kids and my grandchildren know not to go near him and to fuss the softy cats instead

I don't think it's unreasonable to expect the adults there to supervise the cat/children if the cat is known to be aggressive.

I was scratched by a friends cat once and got an infected lymph nodecfrom it not life threatening fair enough but still.

Their cat has been reported on FB as very aggressive with them and attacked them more than a couple of times.
OP, of course you must tell your young DC to not approach the cat, and your DH to be especially watchful.
YANBU. Shame about the cat though, most are loving or just ignore strangers.

ds is twitchy around animals for no reason I can think of. This makes me take more care than I would otherwise as a twitchy or nervous child is more likely to startle or frighten an animal and if they can't get away they may nip or scratch.

You are very sensible

i would definitely tell the kids to leave the cat alone. the cat will appreciate it if its that aggressive!

YANBU to remind them that the cat might want a bit of its own space and to be careful of it. Part of learning to live with animals is learning to respect their personal space and not to dominate them, lest claws and teeth be used to tell them off!

I tell visiting kids to ignore the cat or just stroke her gently on the head -if you move too quickly or eyeball her at her level, she has been known to give a warning swipe. Mostly she will just run away though. No one has been hurt but I do think children need warning (especially if they have a cat you can pick up and cart around or sit on!)

Yanbu

We used to have a cat who would run away rather than swipe, and we have a rabbit who is the softest thing and when they were younger were a bit rougher with it (obviously I showed them how to treat animals and stopped them if they were going to hurt it when they were little, ok now they are older) so they are used to our pets being soft, they aren't keen on animals in petting zoos etc though.

I worry that they will assume the cat is ok to stroke, when it isn't, and they might be a bit rough stroking it as kids can be sometimes.

I wouldn't be so worried if I knew they would be watched, but I know the kids will just be left to it, OH has said as much. Common sense isn't his strong point, yet if I mention something I'm overreacting or nagging

I do have anxiety so know I worry excessively sometimes :o

Depends how kids treat the cat. If they are upsetting or teasing him -- then it is right to tell them to stay away.
Otherwise, the worst thing a cat can do is scratch.
What is unreasonable, that 6 and 7yos would be frightened of a cat.

It'll probably hide when they all turn up.

I would be having discussions about how to stroke/deal a cat. However, if the cat is known to be aggressive/nervous I would be warning them to stay away. Cats as a rule don't like kids much. My incredibly soppy and clingy cat (to me) hates children and will scratch them if they try picking her up. Luckily she won't attack unless provoked so visiting children who are warned to leave her alone, and then get scratched recieve little sympathy from me. (i'm talking age 6 and up, not toddlers).

You're very sensible. You might be able to tell from my username that I'm a cat person, but cats are all different. Some are daft, soft soppy sods like my mog who would hit the deck for a tummy tickle faster than it takes to say 'kitty'. My parents have a cat that will suddenly wrap it's jaws around your wrist and try to snap your arm.

Cats are predators, we like to think they should all be soft benign creatures but they're not and that's just nature. Good on you for helping your children to develop realistic expectations.

My parents have a scratchy cat. We just stay away from her when we visit and its fine. A lot of aggressive / tetchy cats prefer to be left alone anyway.

YANBU. My grandmother had a furry ball of spite aggressive cat when I was a child, Mum always warned me to stay away from it because that's the sensible thing to do, admittedly I didn't always listen and i got scratched a lot but at least I knew it was just a rather nasty cat so didn't get scared of other cats.

Our cat can be a bit tetchy, I usually warn people...

My friend brought her toddler round one day, before I had a chance to say anything, she spotted the cat, ran up to him, gave him a great big hug, and ran off squealing happily!!

The cat just sat there looking puzzled and a bit embarrassed

Definitely not unreasonable. My saint of a cat administered a soft paw slap today after some outrageous goading from DS. He was in danger of having his back hair ripped clean out otherwise.

DS found it hilarious, Cat was clearly disgusted with himself and spent all evening hiding and looking aggrieved. My point, I think, is that if a small child can push my easy going and child adoring cat to slapping then a set of small children can easily cause a rescued cat with issues to attack. Warning the weans is only fair to them and to the cat.

YANBU.

Particularly if the adults who should be supervising can't be relied upon to do their job properly.

My cat bit me today, so I'm under no illusions about how they can react.

Not unreasonable, although at your DC's age I don't think there's too much damage a cat can do. Having said that I'm perhaps not the best judge. We have two cats, one is not too keen on DD. When she was at the cruising stage she was going along the side of the sofa where the cat was sleeping. I didn't see exactly what happened, but heard the hiss, following by the sobbing, cat had bitten DD on the face. Two puncture wounds, a trip to a&e and a week of antibiotics. Oops, poor parenting, although id like to point out i was actually sitting on the sofa too! I'd like to say she's learnt to leave the cat alone, she hasn't, although I think they have developed a mutual respect for each other!!

YANBU, and I'd agree with Xoch's solution - if they understand that it is this particular cat that is aggressive (don't know there is human equivalent they know to help with explaining?) and why, then it shouldn't increase their wariness around other animals.