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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not get "pampering girls' nights in"?

87 replies

samandi · 07/11/2013 10:33

Are they really that fun? Wouldn't it be more relaxing to put gloop all over your face when you're by yourself? How do you eat and drink while carrying out all those beauty treatments? What's the point of it all if you're going to stuff your face with ice cream and chocolate? And do all women really love ice cream and chocolate that much anyway? Confused

Sorry there are a lot of questions, I am just hoping someone can explain the appeal and I'm wondering if they're really that commonplace :-)

OP posts:
harticus · 07/11/2013 11:33

My idea of total utter fucking hell.
But then so is shopping.
Would rather go to the dentist than the hairdresser.
And I don't have a shoe fetish or fancy any particular movie/telly stars.

I am a bit crap at being a woman really.

SolidGoldBrass · 07/11/2013 11:33

My idea of hell. And most of my friends would agree - nights with each other are either about going out or, if meeting at someone's house, it would be about drinks, eating, gossip and possibly board games/craft activities. It's also true that I have hardly any female friends who give a crap about most 'beauty' treatments as it is - no manicures or spray tans and not much more than a regular wash and a dollop of something moisturizing for the rest of it. (We like make up for colour and mucking about with, but not all the time).

But, like others have mentioned, this is predominantly a media invention a) to sell cosmetics and b) to perpetuate the idea that women are silly and trivial, that they do have a duty to be good to look at but that the actual tasks this necessitates are silly and trivial. ANother example of how women can't win, really.

bigbrick · 07/11/2013 11:36

harticus - also agree on shopping.

WhatTheFoxSays · 07/11/2013 11:38

Lol does anyone actually do these things? I don't think I've ever met anyone in real life who does and this seems to be reflected online.

TunipTheUnconquerable · 07/11/2013 11:42

'LaurieFairyCake - Perhaps the beauty aspect isn't that much fun but as it needs to be done it's better with alcohol and moral support, is that kind of what you're saying?'

Ah, interesting theory. Kind of like when I was an undergraduate and we had a shitload of Greek irregular verbs to learn, we would get together with our mates with drinks and snacks and practise them together.

Though on balance I would have more fun with the Greek verbs, tbh.

LaRegina · 07/11/2013 11:44

I don't get it. I've been invited to a few over the years but I've always declined. I'm all for lying in the bath, face pack on, surrounded by candles, but I tend to be on my own when I'm doing so Smile

Fakebook · 07/11/2013 11:50

I'd hate this. I've never been into beauty treatments with friends though. My sister is and visits spas for facials and stuff with her friends. We used to have a Sunday night beauty night when were younger and that used to be fun.

I also hate shopping with friends or people in general.

squoosh · 07/11/2013 11:51

I have to shop solo. Group shopping is not fun.

AnkaretLestrange · 07/11/2013 11:54

What sgb said.

I am a vain twat and wear make up all the time, do my hair etc but that is just part of getting ready.

The idea of having a spa day, pampering treatment thing at home as some sort of social activity or 'treat' is anathema to me.

KellyElly · 07/11/2013 11:54

I had one of those nights with a mate where we were drinking wine and 'pampering'. Too much wine was had and I woke up with streaky fake tan and badly done nails Grin. Should have just stuck to the wine and saved the pampering for a spa day with the professionals!

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 13:14

I go to the shop buy what i need and then go home shopping lunch more shopping isn't for me either I am pretty rubbish at this woman thing Grin

I never understand why some women need to have an excuse to get together oh we are having a pamper night oh we are having a candle party, nobody really cares imo it is an excuse to sit and chat why dont they say come over for a night of crisps nibbles and wine/vodka/beer/tea

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 13:14

Oh jings i said nibbles I do apologise

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 13:16

a woman I know organises pyjama parties for her friends they all go to each others houses to get pissed socialise with their pyjamas on Confused

merrymouse · 07/11/2013 13:25

It's a bit odd isn't it. Most of the stuff involved in beauty treatments isn't that social. If you are a teenager and it's all really new and exciting I can see the appeal, but not if you have been painting your nails for 20 years.

Original poster
samandi · 07/11/2013 13:43

Well I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't get it! :-)

I had one of those nights with a mate where we were drinking wine and 'pampering'. Too much wine was had and I woke up with streaky fake tan and badly done nails

Now that is a very good reason not to do it.

OP posts:
TunipTheUnconquerable · 07/11/2013 13:55

I love the way so many of us are mystified by this Grin
It makes me feel normal.

Maybe it's like at primary school where girls are always wanting to do each other's hair. I was always being given offers of makeovers at secondary school, too, because I was so frumpy.

MrTumblesKnickers · 07/11/2013 14:04

I've never heard of this other than on TV, does it actually happen?

squoosh · 07/11/2013 14:05

It's kind of like that cliché of women having giggly pillow fights whilst clad only in their bra and knickers.

I know that I'm forever doing that!

Rosencrantz · 07/11/2013 14:07

Pretty sure it's about the company OP. Anything my mates and I do together is fun, we'd love this. Mostly because we'd get drunk in the process.

FestiveEdition · 07/11/2013 14:09

Surely its a teenage girl 'thing'?
As a grown-up ....just show me the way to the spa, please (though I don't mind doing those days with a friend)

Girls night in? just wine, nibbles and good company please! Unadulterated by dripping cosmetics and the smell of leg wax.

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 16:56

It's kind of like that cliché of women having giggly pillow fights whilst clad only in their bra and knickers

sqoosh have you been watching grease and singing look at me im sandra dee Grin

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 16:58

maybe women who do this just like the facepacks and whatever thing I just dont understand it all together can they not just get stuck into the drink as lets face it thats all they are there for, the women I work along side talk about face creams and beauty regimes and I honestly think i have fallen from a spaceship,

dont get me wrong i get along with them great just when they start talking acryllic nails i switch off

Preciousbane · 07/11/2013 17:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

exexpat · 07/11/2013 17:14

I can't think of anything worse than a pamper party. It sounds like something invented by a teenage magazine.

Unfortunately, it seems to have taken hold, and my DD's school PTA is having a "mums' pamper evening" soon, with all sorts of 'therapists' booked, presumably so you can get your face covered in gunk or your feet massaged while in the company of lots of women you don't even know very well.

I won't be going.

mrsjay · 07/11/2013 17:15

Unfortunately, it seems to have taken hold, and my DD's school PTA is having a "mums' pamper evening" soon, with all sorts of 'therapists' booked, presumably so you can get your face covered in gunk or your feet massaged while in the company of lots of women you don't even know very well.

good god , I went to a ladies fund raiser it was full of all that crap I was miserable and got drunk