Should I have stood up for myself, or WIBU to just let this go?

[RevoltingPeasant]

We live in a pretty decent neighbourhood - nothing fancy, but quiet and lots of families and OAPs. At the bottom of our street is a pub which I've always thought doesn't really fit - it's very Sky sports n loud music, and there are always lagered up men sitting outside.

Last night I went for a walk before bed on my own. I walked past the pub, not paying much attention except just to clock there were two men outside.

Suddenly one of them stood up and shouted "oi, my friend wants to "

Whereupon the other stood up, approached the little fence thing around the pub garden - so quite close to where I was walking - and started screaming you fat cunt, jog on fattie at me.

I just sort of raised my eyebrows at him and walked past - I was damned if he was going to make me cross the road or act intimidated - but I still feel kind of cowardly. Should I have said something? What right does he have to scream drunken obscenities at women?

I feel like the safe answer is no, say nothing, but it boils my piss that women effectively have to take this abuse. AIBU?

I would have told them to fuck off, but it probably wouldn't have been the smartest thing to do.

What a bunch of twats!

YANBU at all. What a shitty thing to happen.

I would have let it go, they are just sad arseholes with tiny dicks who get their kicks intimidating women, glad you didn't give them the satisfaction of crossing the road.

You did exactly the right thing. They wanted a reaction and you didn't give it to them.

No reaction is often the best reaction to this sort of idiocy. They are looking for a reaction.

Very intimidating tho.

I wouldn't have said anything because getting away from them seems like the most sensible thing to do if you're alone.

If they behave like that they probably have fairly shit lives, so I'd feel sorry for them.

You did the right thing- they were looking for either a confrontational reaction or for you to be visibly intimidated. Showing casual disdain means they are just left looking stupid- best you can do in the circs.

It's disgusting that this goes on at all though and for you!

How horrid, I am glad you said nothing on this occasion though, if he didn't mind screaming that out at you, goodness knows what else he would have been happy to do.

What sort of nasty brain would emmit such filth and vile, and he has to live with that brain.

Wankers. Would have just muttered I think. Ignore them. Men are fuckers sometimes.

You did the right thing but you should've reported it.

What sort of man shouts vile insults to a woman on her own ?. You did the right thing, these type of twats don't deserve your breath, knobheads.

I'd have complained to the landlord. Pubs - no matter how rough - don't want their customers abusing the general public.

Thanks. I just keep thinking this would never happen if DH was with me. Whereas I am much the more confrontational of us two!

It was on the tip of my tongue to say something but they were both standing up and as it was rubbishy weather there was no one else in the street. And there were two of them.

Gah.

Brian that was sort of what was in my mind when I described the pub as not fitting in. Not sure the landlord will care much about the neighbours. Maybe I should though, go in one weeknight fairly early or a weekend lunchtime and ask for a word.

Or maybe just let go.

I think this is one of those situations where you will always think "Oh I wish I had said x, y or z" or someone else will tell you they would have said something. Ultimately though, you will never know what those fuckwits were capable of so the wise thing was to walk away and say nothing.

Just thank your lucky stars you don't have that coming home to you, pissed on a Saturday night. I'd be putting a pillow over his face.

You could mention it to your neighbourhood policing team. They might have a word with the landlord. If there are a lot of complaints, it could affect the landlord's licence.

Im quite bold so i wouldve said " shut the fuck up you moron"( i cant help myself)maybe not best idea but i hate bullies.

OP, FWIW, I think that you did stand up to them. When some people have a drink, they get aggressive & fight. That was their mind set when you went for your walk. You ignored them, did not allow their aggression to intimidate you to change your plans. You modelled the correct behaviour & incredible strength of character by remaining calm, not stooping to their level & continuing on your route. In doing this you did stand up for your rights by refusing to be intimidated or descend to their level.
Well done, I think you were very brave

I think you did the right think. Utter twunts though. Has anyone else had problems with the pub?

These are the kind of people who make me glad it's illegal for me to own a handgun. I'd shoot 'em - or feel very much like it, anyway.

In a broader sense, why is it seen as ok in a general sense that some men behave like this? Why does our society just say 'oh well' to this? Why isn't the pub landlord coming out to throw them out?

Is it part of a chain (Punch, Mitchell & Butlers etc?) if so I'd be inclined to send an email to them letting them know about the anti social behaviour & disinterested landlord.
They might be happy to address it for you if the LL is risking their licence.

Sorry that happened to you though, some people are just vile.

the LL will care if he ends up with the police in because his patrons have been threatening or intimidating passers-by. It is his responsibility to ensure his patrons aren't drunk, isn't it - he isn't meant to serve intoxicated people, is he? Or did I make that up?

Agree if it's a chain with getting in touch with head office.

Agree, let the Neighbourhood Police team know about it, and area manager of chain if it's a tied house or managed.