Or is FILs partner?

[shebird]

Just been to see FIL for a few days. He lives a 3.5 hour drive away so we don't see him very much. My DH and DCs were very much looking forward to seeing him but his partner was grumpy and moody throughout our visit as she often is which sort of ruins the trip. It is pretty obvious that we are an inconvenience and she can't wait for us to leave. While I don't expect her to roll out the red carpet I would think as a grandmother herself she should at least have some understanding of our DCs wanting to see their grandad.

We do not stay with them when we visit so we are not intruding and really she only has to put up with us for a few hours a couple of times a year. It just makes me so mad that my FIL sees her family all the time but we get a few hours under duress. Couldn't she just pretend to be pleasant for a few hours?

What is your relationship with her like? Any underlying undercurrents frpm the past?

She sounds nasty to me. What does your say or how does he react?

your dad say

Sorry, tired. your FIL

She is a bit odd at times she has been friendly but this is usually when some of her family are around and the next time hardly says a word. DH and I are always friendly and make an effort but it all just feels fake and hard work TBH.

FIL just shrugs it off and makes some excuse for her. I just feel sad for DH and DCs as she is making it difficult for them to have a relationship.

So FIL sees her family all the time but his own son's DC only twice a year for a couple of hours each time. She should be welcoming not seemingly resentful.

That could be what she wants, to have FIL as GD for her DC especially if her ex doesn't see them. I also feel sorry for your DH and your DC. What about DH's DM?

You would think so but I think she tries to be as miserable as possible so we won't visit too much.

MIL is great and is very involved with her grand kids but her and FIL are not on good terms.

I think you are right that FILs partner wants him as GD to her grand kids. She is constantly talking about how wonderful her family are when we are there, as if she feels threatened. A bit sad really for a grown woman.