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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think my daughter is not missing out. Or is she?

25 replies

SwishAndFlick · 29/10/2013 14:15

I was talking to my friend this morning and the subject of technology came up. Basically how advanced kids are now a days and how much more techy they are compared to us. We're mid 20's by the way.

I said we only have one laptop at home that we use. Mainly for email, skype and facebook.
We don't have smart phones or tablets to play games on and don't have a tablet for dd.
DD dosen't ask to play on my ds and she dosen't even know how.

Am I setting dd back? should I teach her more or let her try out the laptop? My friend thinks I'm depriving dd of these things and Im doubting myself now.

OP posts:

TEErickOrTEEreat · 29/10/2013 14:17

How old is your daughter?

NadiaWadia · 29/10/2013 14:17

I don't see the necessity for tablets for very young children. In fact, I think it is sad, they should be exploring the world through their senses at first hand. But how old is your DD? Not very old I imagine, since you are only mid-20s.

Mrmenmug · 29/10/2013 14:17

How old is your daughter?

nomorecrumbs · 29/10/2013 14:17

What exactly would she be missing out on? As long as she knows how to send email, do basic word processing, know how programs open and work etc. by the age of 7 or so, she's not going to be behind.

Original poster

SwishAndFlick · 29/10/2013 14:19

Sorry my daughter is 4 and a half..

OP posts:

Mim78 · 29/10/2013 14:19

How old is dd?

You could probably let her try out some things on the laptop - maybe from the CBeebies or CBBC websites?

I wouldn't worry that you don't have a tablet though.

Also they do ICT at school so she won't be missing out. And kids pick these things up really quickly.

misskatamari · 29/10/2013 14:19

I guess it depends how old your DD is. Personally I really dislike very young children being allowed to play with iPads and the like (I watched an interesting show a whole back which talked about how this can affect brain developing, encouraging a release of dopamine which is similar to that which addicts have) so I'm very against children who are very you do using tech.

However when a bit older I think using technology (such as computers) is a skill kids will need so would probably allow it. I know a lot of people disagree with me though and happily let their toddlers etc play on their iPhones/pads etc. Just seems wrong to me but I think I'm in the minority.

Crowler · 29/10/2013 14:19

The answer is no, and I'm sure you know that.

fuzzpig · 29/10/2013 14:19

No she isn't missing out.

She will have access to stuff at school.

Touchscreen devices are very intuitive anyway so when she does start using them she won't take long at all to catch up. That is also apparently the case with regular computers - I read somewhere that early use doesn't really give an advantage in the long run as whenever access starts they just learn quickly.

How old is she? You could maybe let her type on Word or try out cbeebies games but it's hardly essential :o

TEErickOrTEEreat · 29/10/2013 14:20

No. She's not missing out.

dozily · 29/10/2013 14:20

She'd be missing out more by spending all her time in front of a computer screen like some kids. However no harm in introducing her to the cbeebies / cbbc websites (assuming she's somewhere in the 3-8 age range).

misskatamari · 29/10/2013 14:20

Sorry appealing typos - thanks iPhone

misskatamari · 29/10/2013 14:20

Oh my god. Appalling!

Mim78 · 29/10/2013 14:21

I agree it is not a good thing when young kids are permanently glued to tablets, which is probably the danger once you get one unless you are v strict with it.

WorraLiberty · 29/10/2013 14:21

She'll be using tablets at school soon enough so I wouldn't worry about it now.

fuzzpig · 29/10/2013 14:21

Ah x post on age. I guess she is at school then? Maybe let her type the letters she is learning at school? If she wants to that is.

hopskipandthump · 29/10/2013 14:22

I read an article a while ago about a school that a bunch of Silicon Valley e-preneurs were sending their kids too - the school had no computers, no gadgets, no electronics. The e-preneurs said that they thought screens weren't great for young kids and that Steve Jobs didn't have computers at school and he did all right.

I tend to agree (background in IT). My kids (6 and under) don't have much tech access at home. Very little TV, occasional games on my phone, and that's about it. I think it leaves them more time for imaginative play, and there's plenty of time ahead for sitting in front of a screen.

Original poster

SwishAndFlick · 29/10/2013 14:32

Thanks for the re assurances. I guess I was a bit worried as I'm not the most up to date with technology when most people my age are iyswim.

DD has never asked to go on the laptop so it never entered my mind that she might be behind compared to other kids especially as my friend was saying how her dd plays angry birds and some other games.

OP posts:

thehorridestmumintheworld · 29/10/2013 14:46

Anything with screens can be a bit addictive but if you have a computer why not introduce your child to it but have a time limit and be strict about it. It will be useful for her to know a bit about computers as she grows up and starts school but also she needs to understand there is a time limit on playing with it and it is not healthy to play for too long. You can learn a lot from educational sites etc so I wouldn't say don't let her use it at all, but rather get her into good habits from the beginning.

mojojomo · 29/10/2013 14:51

There's loads of research showing that screen time (tv and other screens) should be limited for children over 2 and ideally banned for children under 2. TV is particularly bad for babies because unlike a responsive human, the people on TV ignore the baby's attempts at communication. A good way to learn the skills needed for a career in IT (e.g. software development) is to practice sorting / categorizing and practice all types of problem-solving skills.

Tailtwister · 29/10/2013 14:56

I don't think she's missing out OP, but I don't think children using technology is 'sad' either. Children pick up these things extremely quickly and they use computers in primary schools now, so I imagine that once she starts she'll come up to speed almost immediately.

I agree that there's a good case to limit screen time as mojojomo says, so I don't think you need to go out of your way to introduce her to it.

fuzzpig · 29/10/2013 14:57

I really, really wouldn't worry about your DD not playing Angry Birds :o

AChristmassyJerseySpud · 29/10/2013 16:56

my DD's are 6.5 and 2

We haev no tablets and DH and i just got our first smart phones.

Neither DD has missed out they are more interested n toys.

NewtRipley · 29/10/2013 16:57

I don't think she's missing out. If you have them it's a constant battle to stop them from over-using them, so save yourself the hassle

LynetteScavo · 29/10/2013 17:02

She's not missing out.

It takes about 15 seconds to figure out how to use an ipad. Before we had one, I took my 3DC into an Apple store and within seconds they had all found the website they wanted.

I think it's good for all households with children to have internet access, but it doesn't need to be used constantly.

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