To think DDs teacher isn't very good and to speak to the head?

[FigRolls]

Dd is in year 1. She's a really good reader but hasn't moved up a level since June. She reads the reading books in under a minute and often is given the same one repeatedly over a few weeks. She's becoming bored and I've written on her reading card how easily she's reading them and asked for something more challenging but still she's on the same level. I spoke to her teacher at the end of September and she said she would listen to dd read and see what she thought but she still hasn't and dd hasn't read one on one at school since early this year. They do guided reading but dd is suspected selectively mute so doesn't really participate as far as I can gather; her teacher didn't know.

Dd didn't talk at all last year at school and barely whispers to a TA this year. She has friends but doesn't talk to them at school. She's doing small group work to try to encourage her but her teacher didn't know how this was going either but said she was determined to get her talking yet had no strategies to share. Dd has asked that I go in and help a couple of mornings per week and says she thinks that'd help her talk but school have never taken up this offer. I'm doing lots with dd at home as she just doesn't seem to be learning much at all at school. I'm all for helping but I don't feel I should have to be buying more difficult reading books etc. AIBU to think her teacher isn't being very good?

YANBU to speak to the head and the SENCO. I would. You don't have to go in making accusations about the classroom teacher being no good. Just say you are concerned about dd and explain the problems.

yes, Judge, clearly all of us who have children with SEN should just teach them at home right? rather than expect teachers to actually do their job

OP, you might find some useful advice over on the SN children board on here.

i just feel for teachers - they should have smaller classes so teachers can help children like ops. complaing about the teacher after one short conversation is not on. speak to the teacher again & seek help from the doctor/senco. also teach her to read to you - why should everyrhing be done to one teacher - do parents not teach at home anymore?

well, a lot of them don't, or can't, no. If they happen to be illiterate or don't speak english or have drugs problems or have 3 children and live in a b&b, for instance. Should we say 'tough luck' to all those kids unlucky enough not to have good home support? Good teachers can, should and do support and teach ALL the children in their class.

Not suggesting OP is not supporting her child at home, but of course teachers should and are expected to teach children with special needs, whatever they are.

but judge the teacher should be acknowledging the problem and getting people in who CAN help.
no-one is suggesting she magically cure this child. but her responsibility is to the whole class, including those with special educational needs and she should expect that some children will need more support and be able to give it. that is part of her job.

yabu - the teacher has 30+ pupils & i doubt she has time to try & coax your dd to read. It is her job to coax the OP's DD to read. That's the whole point. And why do you feel sorry for the teacher? She knows how to read. I'd worry more about the little girl who may not be learning to do so.

And as for expecting every child with SEN to be paired with a parent who has the time, patience and education to teach them themselves... that's just not going to work out, is it?

I once had a child who refused to read to me (ASD rather than SM). So she read to her Mum and it was recorded - I was then able to assess her reading based on the video. In the days of iphones it's really not that difficult to organise. (Yes - and I was very careful to make sure the parent had explicitly consented to the child being recorded on my phone, and that she knew I'd deleted the film after I'd used it, and that the Head Teacher knew what I was doing).

I agree that is the teachers lack of knowledge of the situation and her realisation that sm isn't just something you can persuade a child out of. I would ask for a meeting with teacher and senco together and come up with a list of strategies.

Ds2 was almost silent in school attached nursery and beginning of reception- it was becoming dangerously close to sm but his fab teacher worked hard on diff strategies and he is becoming more talkative ( not the chatterbox he is at home, but we are getting there) Don't be fobbed off- get in there!!

I think you definitely need a meeting with her teacher and the Senco. I would also insist on going in a few mornings, surely this is the best way to encourage your daughter to speak in school, by stimulus fading. I've only taught one SM child in secondary education, she had clearly been ignored in primary school, hoping she would grow out of it and was crippled by anxiety. I only heard her speak freely once in five years.

The teacher sounds as if she is ignorant about SM, and unfortunately, possibly not willing to listen either

I also think a meeting with the Senco and the teacher is in order

I would make an appointment to see the teacher again before you go to the head, you can ask the outcome of what she said she was going to do when you saw her in September.

Ultimately, you need this teacher to be on your side if your dd is going to be in her class for the rest of the year, and it's unlikely to to help matters if she feels like you're going over her head. She's also more likely to let you come into her class to help if she doesn't feel threatened by you, so I really think it's worth trying to be nice but firm with the teacher before going to the head.

Another way of doing it is to ask for a meeting with the teacher and the SENCO together, that way the teacher will have another colleague keeping an eye on the situation and she's less likely to let it slip.

A spirit of 'lets do it together' , tends to be the best approach I say that as a teacher and a parent of a child with dyslexia who has needed a lot of input.

Arrange a meeting with the teacher and senco , come with suggestions of what has worked and ideas that you could implement including you coming in a couple of mornings a week.

Be firm but fair ,that something needs to be done .

OP, when you say "dd is suspected selectively mute" can you expand on that?

is it just that you suspect it? or has she already seen the GP or been through any kind of assessment process?

Only asking because obv if you have the (even vague) backing of any kind of professional you might be surprised at how quickly the teacher changes her opinion.
It's always easier, imo, if you can go in and say "dd has seen x,y,z we believe a,b,c and we'd like to..."

disclaimer: most teachers aren't like this, but I have met a couple who are!

There's only 15 children in DDs class for the record but I do agree that the number of children is irrelevant and teacher shouldn't be ignoring dd. We can't keep saying the teacher doesn't have time to coax dd; the teacher has not tried to listen to her, for all she knows dd may read to her straight off. To keep having dd miss out on things because its assumed she won't talk isn't fair. Dd read all her words to helpers/TA's last year - reading from a page is very different to talking freely or initiating conversation. Bunda - I suspect it's SM as she has not spoken at school even when in great discomfort. I spoke to the GP after 9 months of no talking at nursery school, he said to wait and see at primary. Reception teacher said she was settling in then that she's just being awkward, but I disagree. When I spoke to her year 1 teacher she just said she was determined to get her talking but had no ideas how. Dd is desperate to play with her friends after school as she hasn't been able to play with them at school and its making her unhappy.

DH is assistant head in a primary schoo and just told me that with a little boy who is selective mute at his school, they have a dog coming in and the child reads to the dog (!!) I didn't know that even existed! There's a special needs' specialist TA in the room but she pretends to do something else and not listen in. The child spent weeks whispering to the dog but his confidence has improved and he now reads louder.

Blueberry - my daughter would adore that!

I would definitely go and see the Head. Your DD was branded 'awkward' in Reception and now in Year 1 her teacher is 'determined to get her talking' but has no idea how and seems totally ignorant regarding the issues involved. Plus she's made no attempt to engage with her for literacy purposes.

I'd be seriously unimpressed tbh.

I assume from your posts that SM is not as yet a firm diagnosis and I do think you need to go back to your GP and get more support/confirmation of exactly what might be causing your DD's reluctance/inability to talk. This would benefit everyone involved.

The teacher seems both ignorant and unwilling to do anything other than ignore your daughters needs. Not acceptable and a real risk that she's setting up your daughter to have massive problems in the future due to falling behind and refusing to engage with her needs.

I would be going in to the Head and asking for senco/ everything and everybody else involvement to stop this happening.

I have taught 2 selective mutes - and had a son who was one. What is unacceptable in this case is the lack of plan or strategy.

In one case, the child would read (quietly) to a chosen adult, but would not converse. Would point to a 'multiple choice' type answer, but not speak a verbal one, and would write a few words in response to a comprehension question - so assessment of reading was easy.

In another, the child would read to a friend, but not to an adult. Little by little we extended that strategy - to an older reading buddy, to that buddy in the school library where other children were passing, to that buddy in the classroom where adults might be passing, to the buddy in the continuous unobtrusive presence of the TA.

In both cases, this work on reading was supplemented by a careful intervention strategy under the guidance of external SALT experts, and support from parents - so if the parent said 'read this book with expression' we would believed her, because we had worked with the parents to show them what we needed in terms of a child reading.

The problem is dd talks to the GP, the problem is just within the school. I showed her teacher a book dd read at the weekend - it's about five times the length and difficulty of her school reading book but all she's done is move her up one box.

Please do make an appointment to speak to the head. Whether or not your dd gets any kind of diagnosis, there is clearly a problem that needs addressing.

Even without the speach issues, I would be seriously about a teacher who has not listened to a child in her class read for an entire half term.

It doesn't matter whether DD talks to the GP (at least it shouldn't). With any anxiety related issue context is important. Your GP is not a child mental health expert and should refer you to CAHMS for an assessment. There is some good info here. Go back to the GP and get a bit bolshy, you'll probably have to push for a referral. You need porper input from a specialist who will work with the teacher and the school. Good luck