to think that ill-looking reborn dolls are incredibly creepy?!

[Kacie1985]

I don't necesarily have a problem with the normal baby ones, but the premature ones with tubes and things on freak me out! Who on earth would want to buy those?

I don't like the whole pretending the doll is a baby. I can see the merits of a doll that looks as if it has downs or is ill for a child who has a sibling with a medical condition or even a child with down's syndrome.

@salsmum I remember reading some time ago that these dolls could help people with dementia. I can't argue with that.

@ howsuper I've had a horrible late miscarriage myself. I personally find these dolls rather morbid, but that's just me. I watched various documentaries on this subject, some of which I have posted links to in this thread, and I did feel great empathy for some of the ladies involved. However (and I know this might sound a bit off) I thought that some of these ladies could have benefited a lot from more professional help. Some of them definitely need it.

I saw a programme about them a while ago. And even one woman's husband was creeped out by the one she had just got. He just said I just don't like it. sorry. It was a replica of her grandson who was alive and well only older. I don't see a problem with dolls but taking these strange objects out for walks feeding them and having whole rooms in a house dedicated to them is really odd.

Cross post. Very sorry to hear this Lunaticfringe.

My grandma has Alzheimers and has a doll that she holds like a baby and seems to find soothing. Aside from that the idea of a house full of baby dolls gives me the jeebies.....

Salsmum that's very interesting. My grandmother has dementia and is in a care home (and lost all but my mother at birth/shortly after) and I think it would benefit her a lot. I know a care home we looked at had a reborn doll, which was the reason we avoided it, but I kind of regret that now, as I think it would help.

I'm so very sorry for your loss and pain, Lunaticfringe.

LunaticGringe - my heart goes out to you. Very well said.

*Fringe! Sorry for the typo - been up for 15 hours.

I had an extremely prem baby, and I can't even look at the pictures, I don't want to remember her so ill. I definitely would not want a replica doll of my child fighting for her life its just weird.

*dd is 4 now and much healthier.

I can't stand them, they're horrible in my eyes but if some women draw comfort from them I can't judge them.

Annagramma that is such a shame because I think having a reborn in the home indicates that the activity leader knows 'what works' for some of the residents..Last Christmas I bought a DVD which had different log fires (real flame effects) on it...near Christmas we turned some of the lights down...put the 'fireside' DVD on and played Christmas carols on the C.D. player, it was lovely and cosy and my lovely residents really enjoyed it (so did a few of the staff too)...I also bought a snooker table which flipped over to a air Hockey table..we had a lady with a Dementia who was a whizz at it and it was wonderful when she had a game with her sister and won!!. I know that Dementia can be very isolating (my Mum is in final stages of Dementia and my Mum in law had it too) so for this lady to be able to re-connect with her sister was great. I loved working with the elderly and learnt so much...wonderful people! .

salsmum it's lovely that you're able to use tools like this to help people.

I think what's worrying OP and rather a lot of other people on this thread is the almost casual use of reborn dolls in daily life. Especially deliberately disabled dolls. It's (jumps out of closet) really SICK!

If a reborn doll is genuinely helping a grieving mother to handle her loss, of course I don't want to interfere in that process.

But some of what we're hearing about is floating dangerously close to Obsessive/Compulsive behaviour.

salsmum your experiences are really interesting and I am glad the dolls are helping. Out of interest what happens if you use ordinary dolls? Are they rejected by the residents?

While I appreciate these dolls do help some people and have no problem with anyone who wants one getting one, personally I still find them freaky because they look like still, unmoving and frankly dead babies.

Salsmum your posts are lovely.

People will try to cope with infertility or the death of a child in different ways...but even if you don't understand the use of reborn dolls I think it's so gratuitous and hurtful to come on here and say they are 'creepy' and wrong, whatever your own experiences.

I have my own opinions too but who the hell am I to judge or make people feel that little bit more alienated, that little bit more sad?

I am so deeply sorry for everyone on here who's gone through the devastation of losing dc - now I'm hiding the thread as I think it is horrible.

I tend to think any doll is scary. Its the eyes...

Sals - what a lovely post. Ive seen what happens when an actress comes into a home dressed in 1940s clothes and using music and common items from the time talks as if the past is today. Everyone comes alive and its so lovely hearing these lovely people stories and seeing the comfort this gives. Wii also is an amazing invention with the bowling game being the most popular in one home i visit. I can see the reborn dolls helping as alot residents have friend(soft toy,doll) that sits with them and gives comfort. Thank you x

Salsmum, that's lovely.

At a friend's house I nearly screamed when Baby Annabel turned her head towards me. All dolls are creepy ! Those life like babies that women buy for themselves are terrifying .

Howsuper I think you are exaggerating a bit. No one is saying that the people who like these dolls are creepy or that having them is morally wrong. Clearly they are liked by many people and actually give comfort and help to others...the dolls themselves can still appear creepy to some of us. I also find snakes and spiders creepy and can't see why anyone would have them as pets, but that still doesn't mean that there is anything wrong in having them as pets or that it is horrible of me to call their pets creepy.

the dolls themselves can still appear creepy to some of us.

Apparently there's a reason for that. I was reading an article about why heavey handed Hollywood facial plastic surgury can freak people put. Apparently humans are programmed to be repulsed by anything "not quite human". Ie we tend to pull back from something of orgins unknown trying to pass itself off as one of us. Or something like that anyway.

Yikes! Why is the baby monkey wearing a pink baby-grow? That's strange

Salsmum

Really interesting what you say about people with dementia and these dolls. People with dementia are denied so much physical comfort in some cases and the ability to "care" for others. I can think of several people I used to work with who would have responded to these dolls.

I was genuinely surprised when my mother told me a few weeks ago that my grandmother (recently diagnosed with dementia) is very happy indeed in the home she's not been in long, with one of these dolls. It does indeed work. Apparently she feeds him/her (it changes!) biscuits although obviously without much success..!

She had a stillbirth and one of her three other DCs took her own life nearly 30 years ago so once I'd thought about it I realised how something like this could give her comfort. I haven't seen her myself as we live six hours away since July (she was still at her own home then, very interested in my DCs too!) so I don't know if she knows it's really a doll or not, but I am very glad something is making her happy. She needs it.

Although I am a bit more over the (not very old) woman I saw in Bluewater a few years back with one in a VERY expensive pram, buying baby clothes for it in one of those expensive boutiques. She was seemingly a regular as well from the way she was chatting to the sales assistant! Still, I have to wonder what she has gone through for her to be that way.

"Uncanny Valley" is the term I think you're looking for over things not looking quite human and creeping us out!