AIBU or is my DSiS re: Nits

[siblingrevelry]

My niece was sent home this morning (or rather, my DSis was called and informed she had head lice, and so naturally said she would come and collect & treat her).

My DSis is mortified, and feels like it's something to be embarrassed about. She has been regularly checking for lice since the letters went out a week or two ago, and just hadn't seen any so was satisfied that her DD didn't have them. She is now worried about what other parents will think.

Surely we've moved on from the times when head lice were thought of as something bad? We know they thrive in clean hair, that they are transferred from head to head, so would you judge a mother or child if you found out they had them?

So AIBU in reassuring her, or is she BU in worrying too much that people have an issue with this?

I would judge a mother if she didnt treat them.

I would not judge anyone who collected their child and treated it straightaway

I'm surprised the school phoned about it tbh - singles her out in front of everybody for a start. Could they not just have sent a note home with her?

What NoAddedSuga said.

The school are actually on quite dodgy ground here. They shouldn't have sent her home. The guidelines tell them to just inform all parents.

As a childminder I wasn't even allowed to check children's heads in my own home so how do they know she has them?

Your SIL should be aware that the only way to know if your child has headlice (unless they are crawling with them) is to comb through with conditioner and a nit comb and examine what comes out on the comb. She has just found out the hard way that you don't generally just 'see' them.

A quick comb and condition to get out any live lice and she can go straight back into school.

I can't imagine anyone at our school judging her - nits are constantly being passed round. I wish they'd send kids (including mine if necessary) home straight away tbh as it might help sort the problem.

Ask her how she is checking her dd for nits though. One thing I've learnt from nit-magnet ds1 is that you can't tell just by looking, even when children have short hair. I nit comb both boys once a week to check them and have never seen a nit/louse free in their hair, only on the comb.

I dont see how shr can have been checking and missed them tbh, esp if the school noticed straight away!

was she scratching?

I get pissed at my bil and ex sil for not treating (they always say they do but they don't! mil does it off her own back!) and then letting their kids all over mine without warning.

a 'heads up' if you will goes a long way

I have to say after working in a school you can see headlice without 'checking' for them. Sometimes one of the little blighters can be seen walking along a hair at the top the head for example. School should not have singled her out though.
Your Dsis shouldn't be embarrassed. Headlice can spread very quickly in a class. I check my hair with a nit comb in the shower when I'm conditioning, rather than looking for them.

DD2 would be mortified if they sent her home and I would tell school I was not coming.

Her class constantly have nits, it's no big deal.

I have to say after working in a school you can see headlice without 'checking' for them.

You can if the child has a bad infestation but if the SIL had been looking and not seen them, the school staff weren't likely to just happen to notice.

Apparently she was scratching, someone checked and found some eggs, so not actual lice as yet.

I've shown this to my DSis and she's now starting to get annoyed at the fact she was sent home!

I thought the itching was caused by the excretions of the nits. One louse laying an egg on one afternoon wouldn't have caused allot of scratching i wouldn;t think.

I think your DSis needs to comb through every night weather she thinks there are nits or not. That way you catch any babies straight away before they breed on. A child can be clear of nits in the morning and have an adult or two egg laying on them by home time :(

Apparently she was scratching, someone checked and found some eggs, so not actual lice as yet.

I think this is a big no no.

The HPA guideline recommend treatment only when live lice have been seen (not sure why) and that the child should not be excluded.

the eggs could be old nit cases and may not indicate a current infestation - thats why you should only treat if live lice are found. If they didnt see any lice then it is even worse that she was sent home.

www.hpa.org.uk/webc/HPAwebFile/HPAweb_C/1194947358374 - says no exclusion required and to only treat if live lice are found

Honestly, it's ridiculously hit and miss sending DCs home for having lice.

In DD1's thick, naturally multiple shades of brown hair you never see them without combing.

In DD2's fine blond hair the little beggars walk bold as brass along her parting.

Goldmandra- eggs don't spread from one child to another, live lice can. If someone is treating using the wet comb method (which is the recommended one), then they will have eggs in their hair as they can't be combed out. The wet comb method takes a couple of weeks to be completed successfully, the idea is as the eggs hatch you comb the live lice out. Would you really want a child to miss a couple of weeks of school while the treatment was completed?

I think Goldmandra was saying she didnt agree that the child should be excluded and that their hair shouldnt have been checked at school

Thank you ilove.

That's what I was saying.

The school should be following the HPA guidance and the child should not have been sent home.

Would you really want a child to miss a couple of weeks of school while the treatment was completed?

Absolutely not! See my earlier comment;

A quick comb and condition to get out any live lice and she can go straight back into school.

I don't judge. But when I was in Boots a woman was in the queue in front of me and bought nit shampoo.

The woman serving her after she'd left made a face at me and said, sorry I have to go and wash my hands right now, and walked off with a disgusted look. Like people who's children have nits are filthy and dirty.

I felt like slapping the daft cow.

I judge people who judge people who's kids have nits TBH.

Op said the child wasn't sent home, her sil chose to pick her child up early to treat her. There is a difference.
I don't judge families/children with nits. I get really annoyed when those children are not treated for it and don't have their hair tied up each day. The 'nitty one' in dd class would waft her hair about the other girls trying to spread them. She thought it was funny to spread them round. The other girls stopped playing with her as they were so fed up of the wet combing each night. The problem has only stopped now this girl is no longer in dd class and touch wood no problems since before the summer holidays.

the school shouldnt have phoned her in the first place and then she wouldnt have had to have gone home early. Maybe she felt obliged to go and collect her because the school phoned her - they obviously expected her to come and collect her or they wouldnt have phoned in the first place.