AIBU, or is he?

[AugustaCarp]

DD started nursery a couple of weeks ago, and has been I'll pretty much the whole time. I started a new job after mat leave (she's 1 now), so have only been there a couple of weeks. This weekend she's developed conjunctivitis so we decided to keep her off today (she's got a nasty cough and cold, too). I've got a lot on at work and so DH was meant to stay at home with her today. I've got a ridiculous amount of work to get through which I should have done over the weekend, but he worked instead of me as he thought he was going to have her today.

This morning, I've woken up coughing blood. Been to GP, chest infection an have been signed off for a week. The bastard has gone to work, leaving me with a sick baby.

AIBU to think he should have stayed at home, even though I'm also here?

Phone him and ask him to come back.

That's awful for you and i hope you both startto feel better soon. It's impossible to answer your question without knowing how flexible his employment is about short notice requests for leave.

Did you ask him to stay? What can he realistically do for her that you can't, at 12mo and too infectious to go to toddler group or anything?

He would 90% be staying to look after you I think, which would be absolutely lovely because you're clearly feeling absolutely rotten, but is also a total luxury. Would you have expected him to do so eighteen months ago?

Get well soon. I find in such circumstances that CBeebies is an excellent additional parent.

What an arse ring him up

Does he get paid for being off work?

To be honest I think it's part and parcel of being a parent. If you're ill you just have to get on with it. Both me and DH have been at home ill with a poorly DS.

I think yabu although it does really suck. Given that you or you DH are definitely going to have to take more time off in the future when your dd is sick it makes sense not have two people at home using up days off.

It's a struggle I know I always feel a bit resentful when I'm ill and still have to carry on but it makes financial sense.

Have you told him you are very ill and to come home?

I often have to paint things in six foot high lettering for my husband, he is not very good at reading the signs.

It's very common for dc to pick up constant bugs in their first 3-6 months of nursery. I was in a similar situation to you - I hope you have an understanding manager. It's also good to plan back up and double back up for these eventualities.

I used to dead the phone ringing - guaranteed a weekly call that someone had been sick in the nursery and DC's temp was rising.

People try to reassure you that they get through all the illness in nursery and then don't miss a school day when it really counts.

But that's pretty hard to explain to your employer!

Get well soon.

Just to add, stick cbeebies on, dose yourself up and have a day on the sofa.

My DS is allowed to go to nursery with conjunctivitis providing he has eye drops to treat it.

Depends how ill you are/feel and whether your DH gets paid when he is off and whether you need the money if he doesn't.
I think many parents have had to cope with a child when they are ill too. Its nice if a partner can stay home to look after things - but if not you just have to cope!

Not sure whether it makes any difference, but he's an academic. No one would notice of he was there or not, and he can work from home.

Yes, I guess DD although ill is full of energy, and I feel like I'm dying.

No, I think I am BU. Just pissed off about it!

LTB

I will Midget, just as soon as the bastard shows his face

In your particular circumstances he should come home.

Good. That will learn him