To be a bit  at my ILs?

[phantomhairpuller]

SIL has recently started seeing a new chap. They've know each other years, went to school together etc.

10 years ago, he was involved in a nasty car accident and is now disabled as a result of his injuries. He has lost the use of his right arm, he wears splints on his right leg and his speech is now slurred.

He has confidence issues as a result of his injuries and is very self conscious.

He met the family for the first time this weekend (and there are a fair few of us!) and, according to SIL, it was a huge deal for him.

It all went really well, he fitted in brilliantly and everyone had a lovely day. But as soon as him and SIL had gone, MIL piped up "well, he is VERY disabled isn't he?!"
Cue the rest of the family joining in. Someone even said "does [SIL] know what she's letting herself in for?"

I was sat there like

Now, I know it's normal when someone new comes into the family, to scrutinise a little bit, after the first meeting etc. But, as far as ILs were concerned, it was all about his disability. Like it is what defines him.

It actually made me feel quite awkward and I ended up having to leave the room as I was getting a bit annoyed!

I spoke to DH about it when we got home and he agrees that some of his family's views were a bit off. But he thinks I'm overreacting by feeling annoyed and he thinks that most people would notice the disability before the person in that kind of situation.

I can't help but feel a bit about their attitudes.

[Catsmamma]

And your or dh never said a word, just got annoyed and left the room?

[Laurel1979]

YANBU, although it does sound like something my parents would do. My mum actually got a chamois out of the drawer when I brought a new (bald) boyfriend home and we were discussing hairdressers.....

[sebsmummy1]

I have a zigzag mouth too? Is it to do with having emoji enabled on our iPhones?

[decaffwithcream]

I have the emoji on an ipad.

First one I've seen in a title.