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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Eye contact is suddenly an issue

36 replies

Doubtfuldaphne · 08/10/2013 23:29

Is it weird to look someone in just one eye when talking to them? With some people I find myself doing it usually if they're quite confident types that stare at you or look very directly at you when they're talking to you. . I panic that I look weird but I come over all shy (I'd rather be seen as shy than weird)

OP posts:
SarahBumBarer · 09/10/2013 16:56

I don't make eye contact. I tend to look at the persons nose with occassional breaks to stare desperately thoughtfully into space. I don't think anyone has ever noticed.

ShatnersBassoon · 09/10/2013 17:12

I focus on the bridge of people's noses to save flicking from one eye to the other. I started doing it when I had a teacher with a pronounced squint and didn't want them to think I was uncertain of what to do.

Doubtfuldaphne · 09/10/2013 18:49

What is the Kevin Mcloud thing by the way?

OP posts:
WahIzzit · 10/10/2013 11:34

I tried gazing at dc's teacher's 'bridge of nose' today but I kept feeling I must look a bit cross eyed. I couldnt do it. Oh well will try her eyebrows tomorrow!

ShatnersBassoon · 10/10/2013 15:09

No, don't gaze at them! Just use that as your focal point to let them know you're listening.

Crinkle77 · 10/10/2013 17:01

My god this is something I have never really thought about. Now next time I talk to someone I am going to be concentrating on how I am looking at someone rather than on what they are saying

ouryve · 10/10/2013 17:05

I look at mouths. It helps me to hear what people are saying, properly.

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 10/10/2013 17:12

Despite the fact I work in retail and deal with customers all the time, I find it incredibly uncomfortable to look people in the eye - I look at noses an awful lot, or just 'unfocus' my eyes so it's a blur. I have to know someone well (or have had a drink Grin) to look them straight in the face. It works fine, except when I go off and look something up and then realise I only have a vague idea what they look like in order to find them again Blush

DontPanicMrMannering · 10/10/2013 17:21

Oh ffs I've just found midwife trying to work out if I can look at both eyes, just one eye or flick between eyes.

I'm on a packed train and the people opposite now think I'm odd.

DontPanicMrMannering · 10/10/2013 17:22

*myself!

GreenShadow · 10/10/2013 17:38

I also look at mouths rather than eyes.

It's only in the last few years that I have realised I do this and now do try to look at eyes, but I find it really hard - doesn't feel at all natural to me.

I'm not hard of hearing, but having become aware of this little quirk, I have realised that I think I am lip reading to some extent.

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