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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Call from nursery : your daughter's hair has been cut off

213 replies

emoo777 · 08/10/2013 15:35

DD is 3 1/2 and we have been growing her lovely blonde hair, so that it was easy to put into a ponytail. I have just had a call from nursery to say the children were 'playing hairdressers' and before they saw what was happening her hair had been massively cut off. It was several inches below her neck and now apparentely can't be put into a ponytail and they suggested I book a hair appointment to even it up!?? WTF?! 3 year olds with scissors and not properly supervised? I haven't seen it yet as I have to work ahead of picking up the children. I can't work though as am furious - I don't know whether to cry or shout. What do I say to them when I pick her up? Surely this shouldn't have happened?
Help!!!
xx

OP posts:
moldingsunbeams · 09/10/2013 17:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mathanxiety · 10/10/2013 05:30

Hmm at the idea that 'free play' can or should involve using scissors unsupervised. I seriously doubt OFSTED is cool with this. Why bother with staff at all if lack of supervision is an educational plus for small children..

[I agree with Dobbiesmum]

ToffeeWhirl · 10/10/2013 17:17

Relevant discussion eyfs.info/forums/topic/29839-parents-issues-with-scissors/here about scissor safety and supervision during the Early Years. Looks like hair cutting happens fairly frequently... Hmm

JugglingFromHereToThere · 10/10/2013 19:26

Ooh, thanks Toffee, that looks like an interesting forum to explore (work-wise)

mathanxiety · 10/10/2013 22:21

On a board where the topic is hair cutting then I would expect the issue of hair cutting to be mentioned a lot, but it doesn't mean it happens frequently in the broader context, or that this is a risk every parent should accept as normal.

ToffeeWhirl · 10/10/2013 22:36

No, the topic on that board isn't hair cutting, math; it is parent's issues with scissors.

I don't, incidentally, think what happened to the op's DD was acceptable. I just included the EYFS discussion as background to the discussion.

Personally, I would be very upset and concerned if I was the op.

mathanxiety · 11/10/2013 05:39

'Have you done continuous provision planning and a risk assessment for your technology area? Perhaps it is worth showing the parent this risk/benefit information so that she can see the reasoning behind your setting doing things the way you do? Also in reassuring her of all the measures you take to ensure children are taught how to use scissors safely, and how you reinforce the safety message at every session? Whilst you may not have an adult at the workstation every minute, I'm sure the children aren't exactly unsupervised whilst they are there, are they?

Often I shake my head and tut a bit when parents say this kind of thing, until I remember that most parents don't have the training and knowledge we do, and that scissors can be very scary for parents because they see all the dangers and few of the benefits. Sometimes it does feel that we're educating the parents as much as the children, but I think it is vital that we help parents to understand why we do things as much as telling them what we do!'

What a patronising pratt.

The parent (whose daughter's finger received the 'benefit' of free access to a scissors in a zoo nursery classroom) is a hysterical twit who needs to see how rational the teaching staff are, the method behind the madness?

So easy when you're not the parent whose child had her finger cut or her lovely hair shorn. Bloody right we see all of the dangers and few of the benefits, and yes, when children can cut hair or cut a finger they really are as unsupervised as the parent imagines they are, and it is a problem. Hmm

mathanxiety · 11/10/2013 05:41

'We did have an incident with scissors last year so to cover ourselves should anything happen, we always put 'Give Scissor safety talk before starting activity' in our planning so if anything does happen we can show our planning if something did happen.'

Hmm
ToggyD · 11/10/2013 09:05

"Hmm" if the wind changes you'll stay like that.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 11/10/2013 15:21

Yes, I'm not very keen on the "cover ourselves" comment.
If it reminds an adult to actually talk about being careful then that's slightly different.

mathanxiety · 12/10/2013 07:19

It doesn't exactly shout 'We care' though, does it, and I think a lot of (ignorant and badly trained, etc) parents would like to see supervision around scissors and not some sort of lipservice to the 'ridiculous' idea that safety is important.

Hmm Hmm

I have to say, reading that forum a bit was disheartening in the extreme, and not just because of the poor grammar/spelling, etc. There are some very arrogant nursery workers out there.

bubalou · 12/10/2013 08:16

I worked at a nursery for a year
and not only is the pay minimum wage and they make you work parents evenings, school fairs & team meetings etc with no pay it is hard work. That's all fine but then most of the time you are understaffed because of the ridiculous staff to children ratios that are set out.

At the time in my room it was 4 children aged 2 per staff member. Sounds manageable - except they are all potty training. One has an accident you have to take all 4 with u and watch them whilst changing & cleaning the dirty 1. Also - staff have to have lunch breaks and toilet breaks - they don't give you extra staff to cover these!

We never had a hair cutting incident but there were a lot of bites or fingers trapped in doors and trust me we tried our very hardest and we adored the children we were looking after, we didn't just see it as a job.

It's horrible that this happened and I would be gutted but it is a sad fact that nurseries are all about profit and so their poor staff have to do the best they can with the little resources they have.
Hmm

KaFayOLay · 12/10/2013 08:19

I got a "you're child has lost her finger, meet us at a&e" call from nursery. I'd have been over the moon if they'd said hair instead.
It's all realative isn't it.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 12/10/2013 08:25

I'm sorry KaFay. How awful for you all Sad

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/10/2013 08:29

Just because worse things have happened to others..and I am truly sorry for losses suffered...doesn't mean people aren't allowed to complain about more minor issues.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 12/10/2013 08:44

We had a chipped tooth incident with dd at school. That was quite upsetting. I did the same myself when I was at school, as did my DSis.

everlong · 12/10/2013 08:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KaFayOLay · 12/10/2013 09:29

fanjo It is hair, hair grows. So she sports a pixie cut for a while, big deal.
Save the complaints for something worth complaining about I say.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 12/10/2013 10:29

The flip side of that, though, KaFayOLay is that maybe if no-one complains about the minor haircutting incident that arose from insufficient supervision of children with scissors, then the next poor-supervision-with-scissors-related incident could involve more serious harm.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/10/2013 10:30

Kafay..it still shouldn't have happened.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 12/10/2013 10:52

But KaFay's comments come from a horrible experience for her dd.
I hope she was OK - or as OK as she could be after what happened ?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/10/2013 11:14

Yes..sympathies to KaFay..but that doesn't mean the OP can't complain either

RM0104 · 12/10/2013 12:01

just read this.OMG I would be furious, from a safety POV. Angry its totally unacceptable.

FitzgeraldProtagonist · 12/10/2013 12:55

Pfft. It happens. DS spirited away a pair of scissors from craft table (he is 3) wandered over to computer and cut off the mouse. Now who got the bollocking there?

Not pre school that's for sure. DS got sent to the pre school head for a telling off. I got ticked off for presumably having bred a feral child and not taught scissor safety (no access to scissors what so ever at home) by pre school manager.

I said that at home he is properly supervised. and got a look like it was still my fault. The other school parents' view was that I should have been horribly embarrassed.

I was embarrassed my son had damaged property with scissors. It's not on. I was not particularly cross with the school. They can't watch everything.

fedupoffeckingschool · 12/10/2013 13:08

Omg a pc mouse!! Lucky it wasnt an electric lead!