To think my friend doesn't want to know anymore

[Doubtfuldaphne]

Old friend who I hardly see anymore due to living miles apart has quite recently had a baby. I was so happy for her I chose a lovely present and posted it. I am also due to visit her soon as arranged just after baby was born
I haven't had any acknowledgement of the present even after asking if she got it. Wibu to send yet another message asking if we can still visit or just leave it now
It really makes me sad as she is such a great friend even though we are nowhere near as close as we used to be.

She is probably exhausted and having lots of messages, give it some time then message her again

Are you sure there weren't any complications or maybe she has PND, a bad tear, etc?

Maybe she just hasn't got down to sending you a message with the new baby. No need to overthink this. Try in a few weeks to check in how she is doing.

Sleep deprivation, still being in post birth pain/discomfort, not having a minute to herself, meaning to write/text and not getting around to it.....

Give her a break for a few months

How long ago did she have the baby? Do you have children yourself? She probably just needs some time, she'll be busy!

If she is anything like me, she is stunned with the shock of having a baby, hallucinating from tiredness, frantic about breast feeding/reflux /jaundice/infected c-section scar (delete as appropriate).

I barely knew my own name for the first couple of months, so the idea of keeping in regular touch with friends would have struck me as the oddest idea ever. I doubt I knew where my phone was for several months! I did eventually emerge.

Which is a long way of saying cut her some slack. She's busy at best, having a really hard time at worst.

I think you're all right.. I seem to have forgotten how hard it is when you have your first baby! I wish I lived closer to her so I could help her out. I'll message her in a couple of months :)

She might have had complications, a C-section, post-natal depression, mastitis or she's just exhausted. Not everyone pings back into full health and sociability so soon. It took me several weeks to write thank yous, having suffered several of the above. I was so grateful that only one person chased me for a thank you.

If you are coming far and staying? or even just staying for several hours then maybe she just can't face the thought of that just now. It's different from people popping in for an hour from just up the road. That can be arranged or cancelled with little notice but you coming to visit is a commitment.

I wouldn't stay long as I know what it's like having a baby. I did say to her that I know how new mums need their space and I gave lots of encouragement and tips when she said how hard she was finding it. She did however say how much shes looking forward to me coming over.

If its her first she could be in chaos. I remember my first. I don't think I got dressed for the first month. I lived totally in my own bubble. I didn't reply to text, answer phone, barely left the house, thank you cards were months later.

I would just send a wee text saying you sent her a present and when she is ready for visitors to let you know as you can't wait to visit.

Gosh I didn't get around to thank yous for at least 6 weeks, unless I saw the person or spoke on the phone.

I am ahem relaxed though.