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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect DH to at least say something positive about my weight loss?

13 replies

ElBombero · 04/10/2013 11:03

DS is 4 weeks old.

Started cutting out the crap food this week. I've found it really hard n moaned a lot about being hungry. So weighed in this morning and lost 3pds!

Over the moon, rang to tell him all he said was "oh right well it's not slit is it" I was mad said thanks n hung up the phone and cried (just abit. Am I still post natal enough to be weepy?)

Text him to say he was insensitive and that it was unkind. He just text back saying. Please just get some sleep ConfusedConfusedConfused

OP posts:
Dawndonnaagain · 04/10/2013 11:08

Okay, well done on your weight loss. However, YABU! you are being a bit too sensitive, sounds like he's concerned about you if he's telling you to get more sleep. In fact, if he's not bothered about your weight, he sounds like a good and sensible chap who accepts that it's not all that easy to lose babyweight quickly. Oh, and you shouldn't be trying to at four weeks, he's right, get plenty of rest, it's good for you and ds.

CoffeeTea103 · 04/10/2013 11:09

I think you are being a Bit sensitive. You said you have moaned a lot. Maybe he just got tired of hearing if it , and when you did lose the weight he wasn't too excited because of the moaning. Don't be too hard on yourself, it's only a month.

KatoPotato · 04/10/2013 11:10

What is 'slit'?

Remember your body weight can fluctuate up to 5lbs in one day. DS is still only weeks old, get some sleep, eat what you fancy.

Get some sleep while you can!

KatoPotato · 04/10/2013 11:12

As an aside, I've lost over 4.5 stone in the last year. DH hasn't really actually mentioned it AS SUCH! He just says I'm doing well going to the gym etc.

Original poster
ElBombero · 04/10/2013 11:12

Sorry typo.
His response was "it's not a lot is it?"

Just winds me up that he could of said something kind/positive n he knew that would of been it. Nothing to say well done is it.

OP posts:
CaptainSweatPants · 04/10/2013 11:12

Don't worry about weight loss just yet

BreconBeBuggered · 04/10/2013 11:25

Before I read your OP, I thought 'Well, there's nothing more boring than a regular breakdown of somebody else's weight loss', but now it seems as though either you are giving yourself too hard a time or somebody else is putting pressure on you to lose weight far too early after your pregnancy. Four weeks is nothing. Starving yourself to the point where you're complaining about being hungry so often is not a good thing. No need to stuff your face with pies, but you should be eating sensibly, meaning not going hungry. Your body will sort itself out in good time.

Blokescantbuypressies · 04/10/2013 11:29

His comment wasn't terribly supportive and he really could have done better.

However, from his side, the following may apply:

  • you called him at work, he's busy trying to do his job, maybe right in the middle of something urgent;
  • probably in front of a load of other people;
  • maybe in front of his boss;
  • so he can't "talk" to you at length;
  • then he gets a snotty text from you;
  • he's probably also sleep-deprived, hence the "get some sleep while you can" comment.

(I've been on this side of conversations . . . . . )

Original poster
ElBombero · 04/10/2013 11:35

I know I am, it's me. Just carrying all this extra weight (2 stone pre preg weight). I'm EBF'ing so constantly got DS attached to me, up all night, leaking dripping boobs everywhere, full of baby sick. Just wanna feel abit more normal again Hmm

OP posts:
troublegirl · 04/10/2013 11:48

if breast feeding you need the calories or you risk your milk drying up. don't try losing weight till at least 4 months. if breast feeding the weight will start to fall off once breast feeding is well established anyway.

feed baby, sleep when baby sleeps, eat regular snacks at least ever 2 hours, drink plenty of water. forget about everything else and rest

BreconBeBuggered · 04/10/2013 11:52

If you're breastfeeding a newborn and trying to lose weight you'll be as hungry as an abandoned Alsatian. However much you try to explain it, there's no way on earth your DH will know how you feel physically right now. Give the deliberate weight loss a swerve for the moment. All you need to concentrate on is getting plenty of good food and resting whenever you can.

pootlebug · 04/10/2013 11:53

You're only 4 weeks post birth - go a bit easier on yourself!

You're up half the night, breastfeeding....no wonder you feel like shit if you try to radically cut back on food too. Knackeredness makes you crave carbs. Breastfeeding makes you starving.

The weight WILL go if you want it to, but give yourself a bit more time. I think the best thing you can do to make yourself feel better / normal / etc is to go out and walk. Put DS in the buggy or sling and get some exercise. You'll feel much better for it and it will also help shift the weight, but in a more gradual way.

mrsjay · 04/10/2013 11:55

you are being over sensitive why are you worried about baby weight your baby is 4 weeks old you need to eat to feed your baby I don't think your usband was being mean to you he was being concerned the weight loss means nothing to him because your wellbeing means more get some sleep calm down and relax your baby is 4 weeks old

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