To go out tomorrow night?

[Thereistoomuchconfusion]

I have a new job. Had a text tonight asking if I wanting to go out to see some live music with my new work colleagues. I am scared to go as feel awkward in new social situations however I think it would be a sensible thing to do. To help gel with the team.

But....my dh always goes out on a Thursday always!! I have occasionally broken this rule by telling him 3-4 weeks in advance and this will be ok but never to ask the day before I have tried this before and it wasn't pretty.

I told him about the text but nothing was said. If I insist on going he will sulk and it will piss me off and will end in argument. I don't want to argue so it would be easier to just not go. But I kinda want to go (although apprehensive as don't really know anyone).

So come on mn jury wwyd? (I realise this isn't life or death well it could be if I go and he sulks about it!!)

Does your DH sulk cause he'll then miss his regular night because of childcare issues or something?
If so - then maybe a bit more warning would be better.
If not, and it's just because you're going out without giving him plenty of notice, then tell him to grow up.

Oh yea sorry because he will have to stay in, because of our children aged 5 and 2. He wouldn't care if I went out otherwise (in the nicest possible way). I should say he also goes out wed and Sundays as well not drinking or anything for hobby type things.

And how often do you go out? Drink or not drink related?

He goes out 3 times a week for himself, if you rarely go out then tough shit to him weather its short notice or not! Be different if you made a habit of giving him short notice or it meant him having to cancel something fairly important. But him having to miss what I assume is just a few pints etc which he does weekly isn't going to do him any harm.

It does sound like a good opportunity to meet your new colleagues outside of work but there'll probably be more, with more notice.
How about just testing the water with DH.
Mention it in a "I kinda fancy it if you're ok to stop in with DCs" way and see how he takes it.

He does sound a bit grumpy if he gets in such an arse but if you're not really that bothered then it might be easier to just avoid the inevitable argument on this occasion if he doesn't take the suggestion well.
I do think he should be more open to having to change his plans at short notice occasionally without being a baby about it. Most DHs would recognise this as a good opportunity for you to help you with starting a new job and encourage/ support you to go.

I think really that's why it'll end up in an argument because I will play the 'well I never get to go out card', due to my hours at work it only leaves us 2 nights in together Friday and Tuesday, to Which he will reply well you should go out when you have the night off but tbh I cannot be arsed, so my argument falls flat on its face, and there is also that part of me that actually wants to see him sometimes