Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

To think nursery might not be sustainable for us?

19 replies

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 08:16

A bit frustrated here! Started back at work about a month ago and DD has been very happy at nursery.

However, she has a bit of a sensitive stomach and has occasional isolated incidents of vomiting or an odd nappy. Every time this happens, she needs to be off nursery for a full 48 hours, in spite of being completely well otherwise.

Now I'm not criticising the 48 hour rule, which I know is there to protect the children. I also fully understand that the rule can't be flexed on a case by case basis.

But I'm just wondering how this is going to work for us going forward. All my absence from work is tricky, I'm using up all my annual leave (DH travels a lot for work and our families are abroad). We're thinking of getting a regular babysitter for these occasions but that would be paying double childcare.

Has anyone else been in this situation and found a good solution? I expect childminders would have the same problem, and a nanny is expensive for just one child...

Thanks

OP posts:

SheldorAFK · 01/10/2013 08:22

When did first started nursery she picked up all sorts of vomitting bigs and colds etc, it seemed like she was I'll literally every week and I had to take a fair bit of time off work as holiday to accommodate. But after a while, around 3-4 months it started to settle down and now she doesn't get ill anywhere near as much as when she first started.

pinkdelight · 01/10/2013 08:26

This made me give up on nursery and switch to CM. yes, they have the same rules, but DS got sick way less often. He still got socialised and picked up enough bugs to sort the immunity thing - had chicken pox before starting preschool at 3.5 but just wasn't hit with so many bugs so fast so young.

HeySoulSister · 01/10/2013 08:28

A babysitter? For a full day?

Original poster

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 08:44

Maybe babysitter is not the word I want soulsister. We've found someone who is a nanny who can potentially look after DD on the two days she doesn't nanny. Would be great to have that cover for the whole week.

But if you have other ideas please let me know!

OP posts:

Original poster

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 08:51

Sheldor I hope it's a case of building up immunity. My worry is DH has a very sensitive stomach so could it be something generic?

OP posts:

Icelollycraving · 01/10/2013 08:58

Ds picked up every bug going joining nursery. It is terribly hard,I really do sympathise.He caught conjunctivitis from just viewings at nursery,chicken pox my first day back from mat leave.
I advertised for an adhoc nanny & got no replies at all.
If you have someone will do it,snap them up!

tinkerbellvspredator · 01/10/2013 09:05

My childminder is okay with one bad nappy, she says she only counts it as diarrhoea if there is a second one.

Princessgenie · 01/10/2013 09:10

My nursery are very flexible. 'Loose' nappies are okay - especially when accompanied by 'teething symptoms'. Or when she is totally fine in herself and therefore not 'poorly'.

She also got constipated and would strain until she vomited. The first day they asked us to keep her off for 48 hours; I realised as soon as we got home what was happening so they said they were happy to have her back and would just make sure they were prepared if she started to strain.

Have you talked to the nursery?

EST0106 · 01/10/2013 09:12

At my nursery I'm sure it's 3 bad nappys in a row, not just one, that seems a bit OTT! Agree with the others who say it will settle down. DD had constant colds etc for the first few months, fine now.

SeaSickSal · 01/10/2013 09:14

My childminder is fine with nappies as it is often teething which causes the funny nappies. With sickness she just asks them to be taken home until they are well.

It hasn't meant that my baby has been sicker because the rules are less strict. I think the 48 hour rule is often closing the stable door after the horse has bolted anyway.

Tailtwister · 01/10/2013 09:22

It's a nightmare, you have my sympathy OP. Both mine caught everything going during the first few months and I had to take annual leave to cover it.

Is taking some parental (unpaid) leave an option? Some companies allow this, although I believe it should be taken in blocks of a week. Might be useful if dealing with the likes of chicken pox though. I also worked from home occasionally.

DingbatsFur · 01/10/2013 09:29

Your scenario op is one of the reasons we switched to a cm. Our nursery had lots of wonderful rules about rashes and sickness, the vast majority of which were picked up in the nursery. V frustrating.
In the end we opted for a lovely cm who had none of these issues and because there was fewer children there was less sickness.

Original poster

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 09:37

Thanks all for the sympathy.

I think the sensible thing to do is probably to see if it will get better in the next few months. The nursery & staff are so lovely and she really enjoys it so would be a shame to have to switch.

I will however speak to the nursery manager about flexibility.

Lots of working late after bedtime and profuse apologies to boss and colleagues in the meantime...

I'm glad some of you say it does get better.

OP posts:

elliejjtiny · 01/10/2013 09:41

At DH's nursery the rule is 2 bad nappies in a row. When DS1 went there I just used to tell them if he was teething or eaten lots of chocolate cake the day before as that would give him dodgy nappies and they were fine with it.

MistyB · 01/10/2013 09:53

DS was very poorly at nursery and suffered. His immune system was weak (and still is really) and he has food intolernances / sensitivities.

After six months of everyone saying that it would get better, we got a nanny. It changed my life, no longer sitting at the edge of my seat at work feeling sick every time the phone rang. He was happier, less ill and I was much more relaxed. Our nanny had her own baby of the same age which made it a little more affordable but the additional cost versus actually allowing me to carry on working paid off!!

Original poster

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 09:55

Yes, in the nursery's defence it is two bad nappies here as well, but that can easily happen: they occurred close together yesterday and she's not poo'd since.

As per my OP I do think they're doing the right thing, but it's just a bit frustrating right now!!

OP posts:

neunundneunzigluftballons · 01/10/2013 09:59

We had to change to a childminder for this reason. It went on and on and every snotty nose ended up with a GP visit and an antibiotic. She was never really sick but DH and I were taking a half day off each at least every other week.

Original poster

Wildwaterfalls · 01/10/2013 11:25

Just trying to think of options... Anyone know if au pairs would look after a child a full day if they can't go to nursery (in exchange for fewer hours other days)?

Thanks

OP posts:

tablefor4 · 01/10/2013 11:42

Au Pair might, but if s/he had a regular language class (which is the usual reason for them being au pairs) s/he would be reluctant to miss it.

I sympathise it is really tough, I remember it well. Stick it out at the nursery to see if it settles, but CM might be your option or a nanny-share.

Flip