I have lost my job.

[Caff2]

It's a major disaster. I have had to tell my childminder that until I get a new one (and I'm trying really hard, in tough circumstances) I cannot pay for childcare. She is understandably pissed off. But. I didn't want this to happen. It was sudden. We could lose our home, she's losing her pin money for kids' activities.
Our childminder is not registered, not OFSTED checked and cash in hand, a good family friend, which is how this arrangement came about, and I'm SORRY it's gone wrong with my work, but she's the least of my problems at the moment.

Aibu to have her low down my priority list for feeling awful about how losing my job has effected everyone?

YANBU

For the sake of calming troubled waters, perhaps you could suggest that she registers herself as a childminder and offer to give a good reference and recommendation on an internet advertisement.

er..

not just tax. Both OP and the childminder owe national insurance unless the payments are below the limit.

On the rest of it, I think that the friend can care for the kids as much as she likes, as long as she isn't paid to do it. It's the being paid that makes it a formal arrangement that comes under OFSTED and such.

A good friend would have been round to yours with a bottle of wine or some chocolates and an offer to have the kids for nothing until you find a new job and get back on your feet. Shame.

OP, you don't need more stress on the tax front now, but in the future I would encourage you to go the legal route, because it is so much better not to be looking over your shoulder the whole time.

Yes, taking cash in hand is legal, as long as earnings are declared on tax form.

So OP do you owe your friend for childminding services or are you up to date?

Do you want her to continue to mind your child whilst you look for work, and do so for free?

Surely the OP would only owe NI if she was employing the childminder... in the legal sense of "employment".

well of course she is pissed off, she has lost her job too!
that makes two of you.
will you use her again?
you need to keep her on side - unfortunately this is what happens when money gets in the way of friendship.

When you work illegally you forego employment rights so of she is owed money IMO she can go whistle for anything you owe her.

She doesn't sound like much if a friend!

I think if you owe her money for childminding services rendered then you should pay sorry

Thanks for replies - I don't owe her money, we're paid up to date, and of course I'm not expecting her to look after child whilst I'm not working. She phoned this morning, much more friendly, said it was just a shock which I completely understand, it was for me too!

I have two applications done. Hopefully things will turn around quickly. And yes, we will have to rethink the whole registration thing, assuming I do get a new job. My confidence is pretty shot just at the moment.

that's good op. glad she rang and explained. just before Christmas is bad isn't it.

trying to stay positive, but it's quite tough at the moment.